User:Animalted/Red Army Choir

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What's that on stage? Is it a bird? No. Is it the Red Army Choir led by Alexander Vasilyevich Alexandrov? N-...yes... The bulk of might of the Soviet Army, the Red Army Choir is the country's best and only musical ensemble. Not heard of it? Here's some house-brand names you might have heard of. They are also to be known as 4th Guards Army and on behalf of Stalin's command in 1942 as the Red Hot Singing Molotovs. Their first performance took place in the Battle of Kursk. The angelical singing voices of their T-34s were a tough match against the screeching German Panzers who were later drafted into armed service by their victors who said in an exclusive interview with the History Channel that, "They were baritones at best". This put a damper on the morale of the Wehrmacht which some historians suggest and Hitler admits that it was the main reason of the retreat to Berlin, that, and the fact that millions had died. And so, the Red Army Choir performs well in this stage and the legacy begins.

edit 1944 Warsaw

A breakthrough came to the "singing prancies", as they have been nicknamed by the Germans in probably the summer of 1944, the year of the Russians in the Chinese calender. The Red Hot Singing Molotovs, marched up to Warsaw in the midst of an unusually late snowstorm, taking in mind that this was Poland. Again, the German war machine was no match for the singing prancies who, despite being outgunned, poorly-gunned, non-gunned, gun-lacking, outgunned and flanked could push on through and sing and resist the boos, taunts and tomatoes of the German audience. Behind the lines, those freed from Trebleinka were hoping for a better life under the leadership of another extremist, communist, anti-Semitic man, but their hopes were unexpectedly short-lived. One man states to us that those freed from Trebleinka were later moved to other Soviet camps, this man was executed.[1][2]

edit 1945 Berlin

There has been some technical difficulties in writing this due to the following: 1945. 19+45=64 There are two numbers, so... 64÷2=32. This year was in the 20th century which everybody knows, was screwed up which leads to...flipping the 3 and 2, we get 23. 23. 23!!! Also, the following: Hitler killed himself on April of 1945. 4+1+9+4+5=23. 23. 23!!! But anyways, the story told by the last surviving member of the original band goes as such. The rest are thought to have disappeared during an untimely abduction.

edit Footnotes

  1. Historical accuracy is non-existent in this article, beware...
  2. Consult a Grade 10 history book if your soul is on the verge of collapsing soon.
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