User:Aleister in Chains/archive14

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edit Pardon?

I couldn't hear you over all this silence. Pup 12:22 07 Jan '12

Hello Puppy, my old friend. You've come to talk to me again? Al seconds later, Russian Christmas '12
I have come softly creeping, spilling seed while you were sleeping. Pup 01:12 07 Jan '12
The vision you just planted in my brain, still remains. Aleister soon after
And hence the sound of silence. Pup 01:24 07 Jan '12

edit I make me laugh.

...and that's all that matters. - the Masked Crumpeter 14:08, January 9, 2012 (UTC)

edit HowTo:Be Happy

It hasn't been imaged yet, but I'd like your feedback. Whaddya think? Pup 12:45 10 Jan '12

Just read it, now want to kill myself but am too depressed to do it. Al's Grill 13:00 10-1-'12

edit That thingy in the UnSignpost

It's referring to your (non-)judgery during the Turkey Day Ball. Sir SockySexy girls Mermaid with dolphin Tired Marilyn Monroe (talk) (stalk)Magnemite Icons-flag-be GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 21:44, 11 January 2012

Huh? I made a joke entry in the judge's column, saying I would only judge the swimsuit competition. I wasn't even here then. And this one reads as if I was a judge in TAW. I guess I'm going to have to buy a big white wig and judge something to make up for my one-liner. Aleister 21:48 11-1-'12
p.s. Well, I see what he did there. Then he piled on. Better get my wig.
Well, it seems everybody thought you were serious about being a judge. I guess people are so used to your silliness that they didn't even notice you were just kidding. Sir SockySexy girls Mermaid with dolphin Tired Marilyn Monroe (talk) (stalk)Magnemite Icons-flag-be GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 21:57, 11 January 2012
I've already punished myself enough. Leave me be in my shame. Aleister days later, maybe minutes, I dunno.

edit UnBooks:My Tedious Day

A user read my article, went to VFH, and voted. Then, another user read my article, went to VFH, and voted. Next, a different read my article, went to VFH, and voted. Then, another user read my article, went to VFH, and voted. Next, a different read my article, went to VFH, and voted. Then, another user read my article, went to VFH, and voted. Next, a different read my article, went to VFH, and voted. Then, another user read my article, went to VFH, and voted. Next, a different read my article, went to VFH, and voted. Then, another user read my article, went to VFH, and voted. Next, a different read my article, went to VFH, and voted. Then, another user read my article, went to VFH, and voted. Next, a different read my article, went to VFH, and voted. Then, another user read my article, went to VFH, and voted. Next, a different read my article, went to VFH, and voted. Then, another user read my article, went to VFH, and voted. Next, a different read my article, went to VFH, and voted. By now, the article was featured.

Thank you for voting for UnBooks:My Tedious Day on VFH! --Pwn head Sir Xam Ralco the Mediocre 02:08, January 13, 2012 (UTC)

Thank you's which look like the article they're thanking about. Aleister 11:45 13-1-'12
It makes me want to almost not point out the missing word. Pup 01:07 13 Jan '12
If the missing word is "you", not missing but done on purpose, sounds better that way. If the missing world is "foxhole", then, ya. Aleister 15:51 13-1-'12

edit <small>

</big>Hi. 1234 ~ 16px-Pointy 11:39, 13 January 2012

<medium>Yo. Aleister waves</medium>
<significant>I feel unloved Pup 01:08 13 Jan '12 </significant>
<other>Yo. Aleister waves</other>
<mollified>Hey Pup 01:21 13 Jan '12 </mollified>
<mould>Ho. 1234 ~ 16px-Pointy 15:47, 13 January 2012 </mould>

edit Great UnNews

You are quite a promising n00b. After a most important meeting, we concluded that we'd like to keep you around! Go see the vid I put on my userpage! Snowflake mini Mattsnow 17:56, January 13, 2012 (UTC)

Thank you. I hope to write well news someday. If only! Ah, a vid, I haven't uploaded a sound/watch thing onto this computer yet. Do you know of one, Adobe or something else, which won't cause any trouble and play the moving pictures and sound-making yew-tubes? Thanks. I better do a couple more topical unnews' soon, I enjoy the off-the-wall. The newest one is actually just a long caption to the pic of the guy biking underwater which I found here someplace. Moor soon! Aleister 20:42 13-1-'12

edit I'm an idiot at times

A friend of mine has a blog that you may be able to steal images from for one of your pages. [1]. I can't believe it took me this long to think of it. Pup 11:45 14 Jan '12

Thanks. Isn't stealing against God's law, or SOPA or SOPHIA? I'm surprised you'd suggest it. But I'll consider warping my moral code and will look a little later. I just logged in for a few minutes to snoop around and throw some words on the screen, then push the "save" button, and see the words which look like they're typed on a piece of paper suddenly jump into something which looks like they're printed in a book. Thanks again, Yes, it is I minutes later
As long as you take less than 10% of the original, and you cite where you sourced it from, then it's not stealing - it's research. Actually, our biggest legal defence here is that it's parody, which is a defence against copyright violations. The fact that we're NFP also helps, as there is no loss of earnings as a result. The issue with SOPA for me that clinched it is that it will be possible for the site to be blocked prior to any legal proceeding. This effectively means we will be classed as guilty until proven innocent, and we would then have to fight to get back online. It's a complete reversal of legal process as laid out in UNHCR. True, as a collective we're not a human, but neither are the companies who would bring up a complaint, and that kind of process being passed into law, no matter what the cause, is a scary ass precedent. We know that the 'net is a forum for free speech, and government is trying to find any means possible to shut it down. china tried it, India are pushing for it, and Egypt effectively did shut it down for a while. It's a bad, bad bill to be allowed to pass, and if it gets through in US then it will make the firewall over in Australia they are trying to bring in one step closer, not to mention what it could do world wide with countries that don't have the illusion of moral correctness that we have. Pup 01:08 14 Jan '12
Yes (and I was just kidding about the stealing, let's download every picture and laugh and laugh and laugh). I don't think many people here realize the seriousness of SOPA. They're saying "Oh, let's protest by touching up the potato". The point of a template covering the entire main page, with a big symbol of the Houseland Security Department telling people that this site is closed on order of SOPA, is that's what people will someday find when they log on if it passes. People here aren't willing to "close" the site for 12 hours, imagine what they'll think when it's closed and gone. So joining wikipedia and many other sites is not even common sense, it's just about essential. It has a few more days to sink in though.000000----I took a look at your friends witchy site, very nice. Lots of good history and pics of witches. I like the article on Generals and witches here, and it shows that all women are essentially witches and those who know it are even better witches! And if I ever figure out how to upload an off-site pic I will steal lots and lots of those and hide them in a corner of uncy where SOPA will never find them. Aleister 14:34 14-1-'12

edit Tebow UnNews

It was my fault for not checking when you told me to, but yeah, I took it off the front page. It's funny but kinda too short lol. I'm gonna keep an eye on you! Snowflake mini Mattsnow 14:45, January 16, 2012 (UTC)

Here are the smoldering remains: User:Aleister in Chains/UnNews:Tim Tebow routed in NFL playoff game. Snowflake mini Mattsnow 14:46, January 16, 2012 (UTC)
I was thinking of if there was an openly Jewish player - or non-Christian - on the other team it could be construed as proof of one faith being more superior than the other. Pup 06:10 19 Jan '12
Tom Brady (the offensive captain of the other team) is an open Zoroastrian. Does that count?  ~ BB ~ (T) Icons-flag-usThu, Jan 19 '12 9:30 (UTC)
Ahura Mazda kicks Jehovah's arse! Pup 10:06 19 Jan '12
Them's fightin' words.  ~ BB ~ (T) Icons-flag-usThu, Jan 19 '12 10:10 (UTC)

edit The most important message of your life Aleister

Please read this because this is the most important message you will ever read. Its importantness is so utterly urgent that even the urgentness of this message is desparately immediately important! This important thing cannot possible occur without your urgent participation. Do think about the desparate immediateness of this message and do the right thing. Okay Ali? --ShabiDOO 05:36, January 19, 2012 (UTC)

edit Seriously.

I intended for an anti-SOPA protest. But you changed it into an anti-anti-SOPA protest. I wanted Uncyclopedia to support the anti-SOPA cause and you decided to line up with Viagracom and Rupert Murdoch. But anyway, thank God we try to undermine the pro-SOPA cause. GiratinaOriginForme |Si Plebius Dato' (Sir) Joe ang Aussie CUN|IC Kill 800px-Flag of the Philippines svg | 11:16, January 19, 2012 (UTC)

Good news: At least the coding wasn't as flawed as Wikipedia. I'll note Jimbo Wales this next time. GiratinaOriginForme |Si Plebius Dato' (Sir) Joe ang Aussie CUN|IC Kill 800px-Flag of the Philippines svg | 11:25, January 19, 2012 (UTC)
I thought you were Jimbo Wales! Aleister 11:32 19-1-'12
More like Jimbo South Wales. Pup 11:35 19 Jan '12
This is one of those two-talk page conversations. High praise and salute to Joe on his talk page. Yay Joe9320! Aleister 11:40 19-1-'12

edit I blame you

I have been singing to myself I'm Bipolar Girl, in bipolar world. I'm a spastic - it's fantastic. Pup 11:35 19 Jan '12

Well, you are "on the Radio", so you have to sing something. Or at least hum. A friend of mine came to read BipolGirl and came across Bibowler Girl instead, and was confused. hee hee. Al 11:39

edit Non-white background thumbnail images

Just so you is aware, when using thumbnail images on non-white background you get an ugly outcome due to the wiki way of doing things. There is a hack to get around it, which I just stuck in a template at {{ImageNW}}. If you're popping images into something like Game:Randomness Online, this may help formatting. Pup 06:14 21 Jan '12

Thanks. On my screen settings, whatever they are, the images you sent look exactly alike. But since images change on different settings, something I've yet to understand, I'll save the code somewhere and use it. I was going to put more images into that game, and will try to incorporate your coding if I remember, although that is iffy when the bells start to ring and I think crows are jetliners approaching in a dense fog. Aleister 13:16 21-1-'12

edit Hi

I'm glad that you felt the same way I did about Bathtub. I bet if you'n'me tweak it enough, we can git it featured. And by "you'n'me", I mean "you", because I've got fifteen different pots on the stove right now, and I keep setting new ones on the burners.  ~ BB ~ (T) Icons-flag-usSun, Jan 22 '12 12:40 (UTC)

Yes, bathtub could be easily featurable. It is written very well, and doesn't need many tweaks. I'll look at it to see if there is any stupid, but it was interesting and creative on first read. I saw your list, and noticed many of the pages you wanted to stay were huffed. You could ask an admin to bring them back, probably in your user-space, and with a few tweaks they'd be fine. And if a page with a "fix" tag seems good to you, please make a couple of edits and take it off, as it seems the pages tagged are usually huffed after the tag expires (I didn't realize that until recently. Way too many red links thorughout the site now). Bathtub! Put a ring around it! Aleister 13:36 22-1-'12
I know how to get a page un-"deleted"; it's just that I bit off a few deleted articles already, and they're festering in my user-space. If I were aiming to make surströmming, I'd have plenty now, but as I wasn't, having barrels of fermented herring is a business I don't want to be in. I'm still able to read those articles from Google's cache, and when the cache expires, at least there's still the mirror site. Also, I wasn't sure what the criteria were for having "fixed" a {{Fix}}-tagged article, and as they're usually tagged by folks who have been here longer'n me, I didn't want to tread on any paws by removing them.
As for Bathtub, it succeeds the Stupid Test, as it is a lovely artichoke, and devoid of inanity. It is just a wee bit short, and lacks images. We need to play some twisted jazz into it. ~ BB ~ (T) Icons-flag-usSun, Jan 22 '12 14:40 (UTC)
You are a saver, and probably a collector of things. I have quite a few stacked away myself which I should take a few hours to get up to speed (one of my problems is I don't like releasing a page until it is well polished, so when I work on the saved ones I'll probably put in mucho time). Have put some pics on bathtubs talk page, and actually did a plagerism check to see if the page was sporked but it seems mostly created here. Ah, importantly, there is a forum right now which is proposing removing the mirror site, you may want to look at that. Maybe the criteria is if we look at a page and it's obviously wrongly tagged, as bathtub was, it can be safely removed. I removed some of the tags on pages on your list, and on the last few I asked others to look at them to see if my intoxicated judgement is correct. Thanks for the points-in-a-good-direction, and now I must take leave of both my senses and this editing session. Bathtub! Aleister some minutes later
As for removing a {{Fix}} - if an article as it stands is worthy of redemption, usually that can be done with only a few minor cuts and tweaks, and you can then feel free to remove it. If it's an issue of it being too stubby, then move it to an Undictionary article and remove the tag. As long as you're not removing a tag from something that has no redeeming value, you're unlikely to have anyone complaining about what you've done with it. If there is a disagreement about an article, then we can use VFD to determine the worthiness of an article. There is nothing wrong with nominating an article for VFD and voting keep. It's unusual, but I've done it before. Pup 07:43 22 Jan '12

edit HMC 2012

Be the first to sign-up. If you are the first five people to sign up...I will add .5 to your score :) here. Happy Monkeyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy !! --ShabiDOO 16:26, January 22, 2012 (UTC)

edit Retirement

Was rather short lol, I already missed you guys! Just a day off and I'm motivated again. Weird. Snowflake mini Mattsnow 01:30, January 23, 2012 (UTC)

Who are you again? Aleister 1:31 23-1-'12
I remember some time ago there was an Inuit Canadian user...who wrote some nice articles. Or was the user from France? I think the user was a French Eskimo, maybe that user is this Mattsnow. Or perhaps some half human half depraved roman god of something? Welcome back...who ever you are Mr/Mrs. Mattsnow. You'll find a lot of things have changed. It's a new world here for you to explore. There is a page for "adopt a retiree-come-back users" for those who have lost touch with the website. I'm too busy by having a life...but Aleister should adopt you for sure Mr/Mrs Mattsnow. Three saludos! --ShabiDOO 02:03, January 23, 2012 (UTC)
Nice of you! I'll take the AANL option (Adopt A No-Lifer) lol Snowflake mini Mattsnow 02:05, January 23, 2012 (UTC)
Zombiebaron adoptisized me on my return. Pup 03:26 23 Jan '12
And look at the "come back wonder" you are now! --ShabiDOO 19:18, January 27, 2012 (UTC)

edit Moon

Have you seen the movie starring Sam Rockwell? Pup 02:41 29 Jan '12

I have. Cool movie. Did you know it was directed by David Bowie's son? Well, now you do. Bizzee "The Talk Page Hijacker" Beever 02:54, January 29, 2012 (UTC)
You mean Duncan Jones, born Zowie Bowie, who changed his name to his father's surname at birth, David Jones, who for his first few recorded albums was known as Davy Jones, but changed his name so as not to be confused with the singer of the same name. I'm glad you brought that to my attention. Pup 02:58 29 Jan '12
Dang, thought I was the only one who watched the DVD director's commentary and bonus features. And read Wikipedia.  ~ BB ~ (T) Icons-flag-usSun, Jan 29 '12 3:09 (UTC)
You might be - I'm the one who has an unhealthy obsession with David Bowie after seeing how tight his pants were in Labrynth. I even had a crush on Jennifer Connelly and loved Dark City as a result, but my hatred of Russell Crowe forced me to avoid Beautiful Mind. Pup 03:12 29 Jan '12
If you can find the Neil Gaiman/Amanda Palmer parody of Labrynth that's also worth watching. Pup 03:14 29 Jan '12

edit HEY ALI

Spam666 For you. I'm spamming you! But...on less than five pages. So it's okay...right???

Anyways...I have been really really wanted to have a colab of the four of us: You, Mattsnow, Magic man and I. And I thought a great topic would be spam. An article either on the actual tin canned meat (which ive never seen but Ive heard is awful) or about computer spam, in any form (HowTo: Spam your way to success), (HowTo: Cook with spam without getting cancer) or something. Anyhoo...I dont think its a question for any of us IF we are going to do this, but when! WHEN!?!??!

Enjoy the rest of your weekend and here is a small version of the spam image...just for you (and two other people): Spam666

--ShabiDOO 14:06, January 29, 2012 (UTC)

Please don't spam my page. Haahahahahaahahahahaheeheeheehee. I want to do a collab with you guys, that would be fun. Don't know about spam though. I'm a vegetarian (a stop-short vegan because if a good cookie or butter candy is lying around, then there's pancakes...) so I don't think I would do spam justice, as if anyone can. The most unappealing of topics and food. I guess I can try and I can do my best to make all meat sound like spam, heehee, if you'd like. Thanks again for the offer. Aleister 18:23 29-1-'12

edit More junk mail

Spam999 I shoved this into your slot!

Anyways, I uhhh, totally respect your wish to not write an article on something because you don't like it. What would parody writing be like if we did!? ;) I just picked the spam topic because I put a picture of spam on your page and I thought it would be best to give an actual reason behind my dickery (making fun of the whole spam thing) by suggesting we write about it. I honestly don't care that much (though it would be fun). So, are you busy right now, or up for a colab with the three of us? If so, ideas for topic?

Spam999Spam999Spam999Spam999Spam999Spam999Spam999Spam999Spam999Spam999Spam999Spam999Spam999Spam999Spam999Spam999 --ShabiDOO 01:51, January 30, 2012 (UTC)

Hello, sure, any collab. Spam is actually fine, I would just knock it though and not praise it. I've got lots of things I'm intending to work on and am procrastinating on all of them, yay! So sure, pick a topic any topic and I will not help very much but some! Yay! And you have got to put that letter pic on Lyterya's page, as big as possible. That would be a good thing. hahahahahahahaheheeheeheeheehee An idea, why don't we all collab on an UnNews, that would be kind of unique and we could leave it on user space for awhile. Have you come up with more or some good Walk into a bar jokes for that page? It should shape up in a year or so. Jeez, you remind me of so many pages I want to work on. Must go not do them now. Al 1:57 30-1-'12
Lyrithya has banned me several times when she has run out of patience with me. I think theres a 50/50 chance that would happen again if I put a huge picture of that spam on her page. That, or she would revert it in .00005 seconds with a comment in the summary box that would raise the hair on your kneck. I do, however, entirely sanction you to do it, if not indirectly encourage you, if not passively beg you to, if not suggest that if you don't there will be consequences, though I am NOT telling you to. That would be your action, and your's alone! You know...that unnews piece is a GREAT idea. Though, it would have to be a piece thats not immediately timely, but a sort of ongoing thing that will still seem relevant in a week or two (if not forever). I'll see what the other guys say, but we can do two at the same time (spam and some perrenial news piece) and you can sort of kind of help out with stuff when you think its worth your while. Ideas for a perrenial unnews piece? --ShabiDOO 02:09, January 30, 2012 (UTC)

edit The fenomenal four

I thought it might be better to have a little informal and stress free user page to organise stuff and the like (so that other users dont get tired of seeing our conversations about it on our talk pages, get jelouse, and then sabotage us. Its HERE --ShabiDOO 17:57, January 31, 2012 (UTC)

edit Bevel

My dearest Aleister. I read the Bevel article. You are a great writer and I like your style, but I find this article kind of long. IMHO it could use some cuts and a tightening of the theme in general, though it certainly doesn't lack jokes. Don't hate me, but I'm not going to vote for. It will be featured for sure anyways, so I probably didnt even have to write this, and my conspicuous absense wouldn't have been noticed. I just like to be very sincere with my VFH voting. I'm sure that this wont put you into a two year long depression resulting in two half hearted suicide attempts and a final very sucessful one where you jump out of a plane during a transatlantic British Airways flight. At least I hope so :) --ShabiDOO 22:00, February 1, 2012 (UTC)

Hello. No, that's great, criticism is really good. What parts are long? I put lots of data on the '60s movements in there, so maybe more jokes interspersed would help? Pointer outer of any part which doesn't flow is appreciated. Al half hour later

edit Just put your hilarious UnNews on the frontpage

Dr Paul small

So fast. Snowflake mini Mattsnow 11:55, February 3, 2012 (UTC)

Thanks Matt! Compliments and donations are gratefully accepted. I'm hoping it's original, and the Onion or the Simpson's or some simpleton stand-up comic in the Hamptons hasn't done this, but it's too obvious of a twist that its gone undone until now. Fun to write though. I like Gem the best. Al minutes down the road
That's cool when you write something while lolling. Snowflake mini Mattsnow 12:02, February 3, 2012 (UTC)
Great pic! And funny. The last time I lol when writing was last week, when I wrote that sick joke in the walk into a bar collab. It took a long time to polish because I was laughing so much. I'd taken it from two talk page comments I'd just made, put them together, and addededited, lol the whole time. Brings back memories, thanks, good times back in the day. Al minutes
Sometimes inspiration comes at the weirdest time, for me it sometimes happen while jogging or cycling or even while I'm sitting on the toilet! LOL, if you want to see more pics and LOL your ass off, there's a lot on Know Your Meme, I just discovered that site. The entry about Rick Perry's ad "Strong" made me lol for half-an hour. What a douche! The fact that someone wrote that for a presidential candidate to say on national TV is soooo ridiculous lol Snowflake mini Mattsnow 12:13, February 3, 2012 (UTC)
I think it was Jon Stewart who pointed out that Perry was wearing the Heath Ledger jacket from Brokeback when he made the anti-gay ad. Life imitates art. Al Be Here Now
LMAO, i'm still lolling, the Herman Cain entry is awesome too. Did you see that insane smoking ad?? The only entry that makes a candidate look good is the Ron Paul one. Internet people know best! Snowflake mini Mattsnow 12:21, February 3, 2012 (UTC)

edit Collaboration

I would like you to help me do some of the design, so that it resembles the new facebook. We'll be working on the articles together to make a story of how Facebook came to be in the style of a Facebook post. GiratinaOriginForme |Si Plebius Dato' (Sir) Joe ang Aussie CUN|IC Kill 800px-Flag of the Philippines svg | 04:53, February 4, 2012 (UTC)

What? Ha ha ha, I'm not good at design, especially if it involves code, and I've never been on Facebook--so I'm epic flail at all points on this compass. Thanks for thinking I was good at that stuff though (Puppy is one guy to bark at about this stuff) Al hours later

edit I've written one "Into a bar" joke

It's in the "political" section :P Snowflake mini Mattsnow 09:44, February 4, 2012 (UTC)

Good, and I see you're polishing it. Hahahaha, when you leave it alone for an hour I will swoop in and edit in suggestions (collab), and then drink to your joke upon walking into a bar. Aleister 15:49 4-2-'12
Oh, go ahead. I'm through. Snowflake mini Mattsnow 15:52, February 4, 2012 (UTC)
OK, but then you go back and change my changes, and we play and play and Funnybony or Puppy joins in, and soon the joke will be one of the best 2012 GOP presidential candidate jokes since 1995. Al minutes then
Tag, you're it. Al going to eat and stuff minutes later
I'm like you, I'm tired of that deletion binge. I wrote something on BF talkpage. Snowflake mini Mattsnow 16:22, February 5, 2012 (UTC)
It was good knowing you. We are in a minority, and will be taken to the uncyclopedia FEMA camps soon. Maybe I'll get to bunk with Zana! Al seconds later
LOL. I propose the creation of a new award: Huffer of the Month! Much more prestigious than Writer of the Month. Snowflake mini Mattsnow 16:29, February 5, 2012 (UTC)
I must go now (to FEMA camp), but check out a couple of the pages I "saved" in the past half hour. Dirty Old Men can be a classic, want to work on it with me? Needs a few pics, but those should be easy, and we can link Fieal Piety, so TKF will want to save it too! Al minutes later
I hope you don't expect me to do any work on walk into a bar/American politics jokes. I'm still trying to get my mind around the fact someone named Newt is somehow involved. Pup 09:15 05 Feb '12
Yeah, there's a Newt, and a Willard, and a Santorum. Funny if it wasn't so sad that the gang who wins gets to fuck up the world's economy, ecology, and good spirits for a few years. Newt will probably lose to Willard, unless Willard opens his mouth without a teleprompter. And then the guy in office now has a go at Willard, and all hell can break loose. An ugly scene, with an older guy, Ron Paul, watching from the sidelines seeing if he wants to play in the fourth quarter. Al minutes later

edit Please don't change it whenever el Kırby calls me Dan

...because that's actually my real name, okay? And el Kırby is actually a friend of mine IRL. So he has the right to call me that. ~Pleb Sig-banner the magic! Dan the Hedgehog TheHappySpaceman Eclipse BANANA BATLETH 23:19, 02/05/2012

Also, I wanted to ask what you thought about my (original) joke on "Walk into a bar." So... whatcha think? ~Pleb Sig-banner the magic! Dan the Hedgehog TheHappySpaceman Eclipse BANANA BATLETH 23:25, 02/05/2012
We try and avoid IRL names, as some of us prefer to be known by our psyedonym (although I am called PuppyOnTheRadio IRL). It's actually a ban able offence to put personal info of any other user up here. Al was probably doing it in your interest. Pup 04:12 06 Feb '12
OK Happy Dan Spaceman, got it. Puppy was right. I remember once when MadMax exposed my real name, Senator Kay Bailey Hutchinson (R-TX), and my colleagues gave me hell for about five minutes, and then moved on. Which joke was yours? I haven't kept track of who wrote which one for the most case. I'll have my staff get back to you. Thanks for your question. Sen. Kay Bailey Hutchison 12:20 6-2-'12
Your middle name is Bailey? What a looser! Pup 12:23 06 Feb '12
My mother's maiden name is Bailey, and she was a heir to the Barnum & Bailey Circus fortune and freaks, and we lived with freaks and roller coasters when I was growing up. There was this one guy, Cycloppo, who had one eye but I think his other one was covered with cheesecloth and make-up. Mom would prefer him. Then the elephants got loose one day, and we never saw Cycloppo again. Kay (R-TX) 12:34 same day
Never underestimate the value of depth perception when dealing with elephants. Pup 12:36 06 Feb '12
Well put. Poor Cycloppo. I was so tramatized by the situation I asked my staff to write an unnews hostile to elephants, which they did over the course of the congressional session. Sometimes I'll dream of elephants, but then it dissolves into memories of mom and Cycloppo, and all is muddled. Thanks for your question, and I'll have my staff get back to you. Senator K. (R-TX)
Talking about elephants made me think of those things they have that are reputed to be very long, which made me think of a joke about walking into a bar. I'm not sure about it, but I'll add it anyway. Pup 12:44 06 Feb '12
@Aleister Mine was the one about the horse who said "I'll have something funny to say once the winner of the punchline contest is announced by the magazine." --Dan
Hello. Good enough, though tweaking may shift it a bit. I like horses. Kay 1:02 7-2-'12

edit David Boreanaz married to Emily Deschanel??

Really? I can't find anything that supports that. Tinymasaru.gifpillow talk 21:44, February 6, 2012 (UTC)

Ah, I seem to be wrong and in this case it's one of those "I always knew" things. I've "always known" they were married for at least three years now, and have discussed it with people, and have heard from people about them maybe getting a divorce (this actually happened) and now, like you, I find on wikipedia that they hardly even know each other. Remember the old tv show "Quantum Leap", where history is changed (lots of films afterwards on the same theme). On this one it's like I know they were married but there is nothing that shows that they were. Weird, and thanks for calling me on it. Aleister long time later, several hours
If I say their characters on that TV show are...uh...well, I dunno if they're married, but they've definitely gotten each other pregnant...will I be letting the joke go flying over my head? ~ BB ~ (T) Icons-flag-usTue, Feb 7 '12 1:23 (UTC)
Flying over the heads of all who have heads. A cute writer (and by cute I mean her language style)(although she's probably cute too)(I will send her candy and puppies) here has written a page called Bones (TV series). And I still "know" they were married, just like I once knew for all my life that paisley was a color until I found out it wasn't. I knew what the color was too. Aleister minutes later
I just left a message on Romartus's talk page you may want to take a look at. And maybe even reply to. We are some pesky Uncy underlings, aren't we? Snowflake mini Mattsnow 02:42, February 7, 2012 (UTC)

edit Yeah...

Yeah, I'm always there to guard edits from unregistered users from time to time. It was a pleasure! -- UserTalkContributions 23:47, February 7, 2012 (UTC)

edit Ali

Here is a riddle for you. What number comes after 5 and before 7 and rhymes with mix? --ShabiDOO 00:52, February 8, 2012 (UTC)

5.6 The contest is days away! Al seconds later
Im so excited my bladder and bowels exploded at the same time. And everyone just laughed. It was so much fun. --ShabiDOO 00:59, February 8, 2012 (UTC)
Are you writing a page yourself? I could send you a topic at the kickoff time, and you can play too. Seems like you're missing the fun, or maybe you like to watch. Yeah, that's it. You like to watch. Kinky. Al seconds after that post
Why don't we do a totally informal competition amongst a small amount of users and we can judge each others articles. I think that would work out better :) --ShabiDOO 18:20, February 8, 2012 (UTC)
No. Admit it, you just like to watch. Kinkier than a nun's pajamas. Alkyie 18:22 8-2-'12
Avoid Lyrithya's talk page then. She reacts violently to kinky talk. Pup 12:25 09 Feb '12
I saw that stuff about the mattress earlier, I thought she smothered you with it? Cats, not puppies, are supposed to have nine lives. Life's true reward: Buffy, episode 7, season 6 Aleister 00:36 9-2-'12

edit Your thing

(moved to storage locker/awards page)

For direct yet skilful attention whoring. MrN Icons-flag-gb HalIcon.png WhoreMrn.png Fork you! 01:17, Feb 9
Thank you, this is really nice. I wasn't attention whoring, I was just very happy with that edit and had to share it with the world. Well, with a small world of users anyway. I haven't looked at your edits on Gandhi yet, but that page is shaping up very well. Do you mind reverts? Thanks again! I will prize this, thing, and share it with my vanity page. Al minutes later
I only give the award as a desperate attempt to boost my own level of self importance.  :-) Yea, sure revert the hell out of it. You have edited it loads, and know a lot more about Gandhi than me, so I'm sure you know best. I just made a few suggestions, and left a comment or 2 in the history. I was not that bothered about the pic of golem either, and if you are sure it's better go with it. I don't see what you are talking about with it myself though it just looks like the kinda thing which would be spammed onto any old article... Oh... I just found this!!! MrN Icons-flag-gb HalIcon.png WhoreMrn.png Fork you! 01:33, Feb 9
That Gandhi find is hilarious, the first pic looks chopped and the article reads like it could fit in here. Your self-importance is obvious at first glance, and we are lucky to have you back here, at least for as long as you stay, or stray. From your note you moved the Golem pic again, nooooo, Golem, come back! I had moved it down the page per your crying in your soup, and the page does look better, but it fits well near the bottom with the crayone and all. I'll go look at it now. Gulp. Al minutes later
My pologies, good edits! I tweaked the lede a bit. Seem okay? And Golem lives, he lives! My precious (which is what Golem whispered in the ear of all his lovers. I'm still laughing at that article you found). Ah, some good TV on in a few minutes! Al 1:55 9-2-'12

edit There you go you retard

Foolitzer Nominated for the Foolitzer Prize
This user has been nominated for the Foolitzer Prize—you can vote for them or nominate your favourite users at Uncyclopedia:Foolitzer Prize.
Snowflake mini Mattsnow 14:37, February 10, 2012 (UTC)

edit Your happy monkey topic


Your topic my dear Aleister is: Homophones (grammar)

  1. Write the article on your namespace
  2. I'll be judging the articles based on creativity, originality and cleverness.
  3. Good luck, you have until tomorrow night (23.59 UTC, 6:59PM ET) to finish.

(happy monkey just lost control and judged the competition ahead of time)

--ShabiDOO 11:57, February 11, 2012 (UTC)

edit You've Been Nominated for Perv of the month!

This is not a bad thing, but it might result in funny looks from all your coworkers. You can vote for yourself/nominate others here. Cheers! ~Pleb Sig-banner the magic! Dan the Hedgehog TheHappySpaceman Eclipse BANANA BATLETH 23:54, 02/11/2012

Thank you. This is one of the greatest honors of my life. Not to win it, just to be nominated. But have you met Maniac1075? Take along some wipes. Aleister 00:00:00 12-2-'12

edit JCs wallet

I'm reminded of the line from Young Guns, I'll make you famous. Pup 05:57 12 Feb '12

edit I'm vandalizing your talkpage

Hope you don't mind.--Iwillkillyou 333 TALK What's it like to be a heretic? 00:08, February 14, 2012 (UTC)

Kid1Kid1Kid1Kid1Kid1Kid1Kid1Kid1 Kid1Kid1Kid1Kid1Kid1Kid1Kid1Kid1 Kid1Kid1Kid1Kid1Kid1Kid1Kid1Kid1 Kid1Kid1Kid1Kid1Kid1Kid1Kid1Kid1 Kid1Kid1Kid1Kid1Kid1Kid1Kid1Kid1 Kid1Kid1Kid1Kid1Kid1Kid1Kid1Kid1

I don't mind, as long as you go read the only page I've whored in over a year, James Bevel on VFH. hahahahahaha heeheheheheheeheeheheheheeehahaa huh? I've always liked this dancing thing, and now I am lucky to have what, 54 or so of her. Thanks!? Al seconds later

edit Damn Wikipedia!

Stealing our bar jokes! Pup 12:31 15 Feb '12

Ah, now we have something to outdo. Some of the jokes on our page are too "easy" to be original, or at least read as original. Although one or two surprised me when I couldn't find them by googling. Odd that wikipedia has that page. Good find. Alkster 17:19 15-2-'12

edit Justin Bieber is an Dark Brotherhood Assassin

Better be careful about saying Justin Bieber jokes.--Iwillkillyou 333 TALK What's it like to be a heretic? 21:50, February 15, 2012 (UTC) Justin Bieber Dark Brotherhood

hahahahahaha there is no pic, so he is so dark he couldn't come into the light. hahahahah Al seconds later
p.s. whoops, there he is, and he's still not scary. Could whip him with one hand tied behind my back and my other hand holding something else.
I don't know. Dark Brotherhood Assassins are known for their deadly skills. (Oh, and I made this image btw)--Iwillkillyou 333 TALK What's it like to be a heretic? 22:12, February 15, 2012 (UTC)
It's very good, and very small (that's what they tell me too). If I see Bieber within 100 feet of me it will be him that's singing soprano. What? He already does? Well, I'll make him wish he was a tenor. Al 00:48 16-2-'12

edit The Really Big Button That Doesn't Do Anything

I've pruned and repotted this. Did you want to fertilise it? Pup 12:25 16 Feb '12

There is a button? And I don't know what you mean by fertilizing it. Does it have anything to do with plopping? And will it take time away from my duties at "Jed Clampett's wallet"? And why aren't you a perv nominee, what's wrong with people. Al I don't know how long after
I made a sig that tells you how long after. (About 28 minutes now.) And why do I not know about perv, and why aren't I? Pup 12:55 16 Feb '12
I forgot about your sig, and you can't see it while editing so it's not accurate for that. Last I looked it was six minutes ago. Would you like me to add things or take away things to your very good button article? I'd be honored. Or did you want me to put mulch and stuff on it. Al 6+ minutes after Puppy's last post
I havent even looked at the page and I WANT TO PUSH THE BUTTON!!!!!! LET ME PRESS IT!!!! --ShabiDOO 01:06, February 16, 2012 (UTC)
The short answer - add whatever you think will add to it. It's only just long enough to keep it out of stub status now, and a couple of quick paragraphs from you will take it from okay to good. I think there's enough in this to help it survive here. Pup 09:36 16 Feb '12
I've taken it from "okay" to "VFD". If the section I added is worthless, please destroy it forthwith. Or add more historical nonsense to it. But one question I've often wondered about. My edits made the "contents" box appear, and that messes up the black background. Besides collapsing those boxes is there some code trick which removes them entirely? I've seen some people put them on the side of an article, although that wouldn't fix the problem here. Thanks, and no, I didn't push the button, at least today. Aleister 3 hours later
I meant to say - I like the edits. It now reads like something that was written by a random bunch of people, rewritten by me, and then expanded by you. Or to someone else, it is pretty cool. Pup 12:11 17 Feb '12
Thanks. It could be much better, but I don't know how. The page looks very good, and I tried to push the button (as almost everyone seeing the page will do). Is there some way to link the button to some weird trippy page, maybe that gif of the guy floating in the air with waves of space gif'ing black and white behind him, only really large and scary with a background of other scary black and white (I now need a pint of flashing black and white beer). Did you know Michael Jackson died? Next thing you know Whitney Houston will accidently suicide herself (lol, never'll happen). Al minutes later
As long as Steve Irwin is still alive, I'm fine. I was thinking having the page reload 80% of the time the button is pushed, and the other 20% throwing them somewhere completely different. Or something like that anyway. Something like setting it up that someone presses the button and nothing happens, but if they keep going something does. But I'm flummoxed as to what to do yet. Whatever it is, it needs to be very different. I also want to redo the picture of the button to make it even more tempting to push. Pup 12:29 17 Feb '12
Sounds very interesting, and I want to press it now. Maybe you can bring the button along on each new page, and they press it again and it keeps getting weirder and weirder and eventually brings them to some strange wikipedia page or something. Al future Al
I'm sure I can do that! Pup 12:43 17 Feb '12

edit LOL

I know why you so mean. Yo momma named you Aleis. ~ BB ~ (T) Icons-flag-usThu, Feb 16 '12 13:58 (UTC)

Yeah, this guy comes in to promote himself here. That's even frowned upon on wikipedia, which he probably thinks this is. An' my momma do no such thing, dog. Aleis 14:01 16-2-'12
"All the young girls love Aleis...'tender young Aleis' they say..." ~ BB ~ (T) Icons-flag-usThu, Feb 16 '12 14:22 (UTC)
Ah, Ok. /slowly backs out door keeping one eye on BB for sudden moves or tripping motions Aleister 17:49 16-2-'12
Nonono, it's an Elton John song about a know what, nevermind. ~ BB ~ (T) Icons-flag-usThu, Feb 16 '12 18:05 (UTC)
/picks up gardening implement, waits behind door for BB to emerge with Elton John and some lesbians. Waits. Waits. They never emerge. The mystery of the missing lesbians makes national news, nobody cares about John, we at uncy search for BB and find him at his usual places. Whew! Glad to have you back. Anyways, I have to look on your talk page about that great code we discussed there. I'll start by knocking off my index thing on this talk page, which I find annoying at worse. Al 18:17 16-2-'12
I miss the TOC here already. Pup 09:53 16 Feb '12
Seriously? I'll put it back if so. I never read them, can't remember ever looking at one. Do people actually look at the table? Going through a few of "my" pages I see that one some of them it looks good to keep it, on others it's better missing. Al 22:00 16-2-'12

Not too fussed. I just use them on talk pages to jump to the end. Pup 10:11 16 Feb '12

I've never thought of that, for the longer pages. I've always just grabbed the blue thing and tugged. Good idea, and it goes back right now, good sir. Al minutes later

edit Thank you

Gandhi said to me... Be the change you want to see in others. No wait. That was Mhaille. Actually, he was just trying to get me to buy him a pint at the time. I really have no idea why I'm here actually. MrN Icons-flag-gb HalIcon.png WhoreMrn.png Fork you! 22:16, Feb 16

Wait, don't go. Where did you go? I have some flashing beer! Al seconds later after opening up the beer
How about...
“Be the change you want to see in the world”
~ Gandhi trying to avoid paying for breakfast
maybe? MrN Icons-flag-gb HalIcon.png WhoreMrn.png Fork you! 23:17, Feb 16
He was hungry, and craving honey, so it was actually:
“Bees are the change you want to see in the world”
~ Ghandi on royal jelly
Lame, I know. Pup 12:05 17 Feb '12
Your quote reminds me of bees. Whatever happened to them? I would pet the big yellow ones. Let's see, is there a good way to combine both quotes. "Gandhi makes a pun as he manuevers to avoid paying for breakfast." ? Aleister 00:24 17-2-'12

edit About George Carlin

Sure, the date of death for Carlin is made up and ridiculous, but George Carlin really was born on May 12, 1937. If you Don't believe me, then take a look at this. But anyway, I'm glad that you saw some good in this mess I made, even if it was just the swear-word part. (FYI, some of the swear words on that article I made up out of thin air, if you didn't realize.)

Anyway, nice talking to you; oh, and by the way, is it true that you've never read HTBFANJS? -Sir Matthew Philip Matthlock, Attorney at Law LLC, 1-800-MTT-HLCK (Give me a call!) 01:05, February 18, 2012 (UTC)

Thanks, I copied off the swear part and the death date/zip code stuff, which is interesting and which I did look up at wikipedia the minute I read it. Thanks for using the quote from Cemetery of the Absurd, that's one of my own favorite pages because it was so fun to write and illustrate (lots of pop-ups in the article). Stupid dates are stupid, as you will see after browing old and new articles, as are random (someone had to tell me what random was). I must suggest reading or not reading htbfanjs, and Funnybony's satire of it, because that is almost canon around here. No, I never read it, and my reason was I didn't want to be too influenced by rules in one place. I have no idea if it was the right decision. I've read a few of Hardwick Fundlebuggy's pages, and many others, but what has helped me is going through Random pages (and now Random features) to categorize, and thus get familiar with a good deal of the work here. Not in-depth on each one, but every so often a great find pops up that I've never seen before (I hadn't seen Me before yesterday. And saving pages off VFD and the Fix-it pile have been educational. No one has really asked me this before, but that's some of the reasons I haven't read it. Personal choice. There are some good articles and snippets near the start of this page, stuff by TKF and Modus and a couple others (and your Carlin stuff near the bottom). Some other users have written good essays. This is too long of an answer. Bill Maher is on! Aleister 3:04 18-2-'12

edit I keep forgetting to link you to...

...this.  ~ BB ~ (T) Icons-flag-usSat, Feb 18 '12 8:43 (UTC)

Boop! ~ BB ~ (T) Icons-flag-usSat, Feb 18 '12 11:51 (UTC)
lol, it's even funnier looking at it large. To talk you have to hold it up and talk into his crotch. Thanks again. Al not too long later

edit Aleister!

You met me on my talk page on my Captain Obvious on Raptor Jesus, and I just wanted to say hi and you seemed like a nice guy. This place is hilarious and I love my funny editing to Uncyclopedia. And just hi again. :)|

Hi. This land is your land, this land is my land, from AAAAAAAAA!, to Zzaardvark, something something something. Thanks. I've found this place to be one of the most creative and fun playgrounds on the web. Good to meet you again, any questions welcome, and lentils and rice recipies enjoyed (in fact I'll make a user page for that!). Aleister 1:48 19-2-'12

edit Yo, cracka

Help me fix this shit up!

...uh, also, should I just rewrite the thing in the style of Chris Rock? ~ BB ~ (T) Icons-flag-usSun, Feb 19 '12 13:26 (UTC)

Sure. But first let me know if you're going to go the Chris Rock channeling route. You can make it an epic fight between Chris Rock, Eddie Scissorhands, and the New York Times - "I'll cut you down to size, Scissorhands!" Rock screamed as the New York Times snuck up from behind, covering him in government-directed news, ads for the newest shoes at Nordstrom's, and pages telling busybodies which of their friends decided to die yesterday. Aleister kris kringle has a gun pointed at me 13:35 19-2-'12
Your head must be a scary place. Pup 01:37 19 Feb '12
Yes, I seldom go in the head to take a dump anymore, and have to usually just throw the stuff out the window like in the French bygone era or the current Venice sanitation program. I'm going to have to get into two or three different rhythms at once with the Jed Clampett page, after the set-up is over (had to move them to Californi and set them in the house, that took awhile. The wallet has to become more proactive. When you mentioned that Perv defintion in Australia I looked it up, and you have entire products and stores named Perv. Very liberal of you guys. Honor the affliction. Al many seconds later
Yo Al. Don't drink the bong-water! ~ BB ~ (T) Icons-flag-usSun, Feb 19 '12 13:47 (UTC)
Saving it for you. Let me know which way you want to go on the page and I'll be UnHappy to help. I wonder if you can play against the site, say randomly generated pages of either Rock, Paper, and Scissors. Al minutes

edit Guess what!


It's my pleasure to award you the well deserved and near unanimous decision to award you 1st place in the 2012 Happy Monkey Competition!!! --ShabiDOO 04:34, February 20, 2012 (UTC)

edit Oi!

This. Pup 12:57 20 Feb '12

Very good forum. You put a lot of work and thought into the huffing business, and checking on pages seems to be just common sense. Yet people were still tagging 10 pages a minute not long ago (the times of tagging show up on the Fix tag list). I still like the idea of having a list of "to be huffed" pages at the bottom of the VFD page, the leave the titles up for 36 hours (37 hours, yeah, why not 37 hours) and anybody can remove one from the list, then what's left gets huffed. I know that's how it is now on the Fix list, but there are literally no links anywhere where most people look to that page. Putting the page on a VFD list would be adding a step to the process, and would not require the work of actually editing a VFD entry. What has occurred in the past, it really seems, is that some admins wanted lower quality but still good articles huffed, and never took into account the havoc in red links and other drawbacks that that would cause. Nice work on the pages you've saved, by the way. Al 13:06 20-2-'12
We could add a list of the top x pages on UN:FIX to the top of the VFD page fairly easily. That would mean going there would show up all pages (non-QVFD) that are in immediate danger are plainly obvious. I have another essay I'm working on, which is guaranteed tl;dr material, that I am hoping to get on here later this week. (It's sitting at around 3,000 characters so far, and that's just the start.) I think long. Pup 01:15 20 Feb '12
You code freaks know the mysteries. That would be good, at least in adding a layer to the huffing of these pages. And other tags, like ICU, are also a back-door to one-person-VFD. We've lost so many already, but I guess that's why people get shell-shocked and wander the fields aimlessly, and your and MrN's forums hopefully will get some new "policy" entwined into the fabric of this raggidy hat. I don't know what tl;dr means, but look forward to reading your essay (at least 300 characters of it). Al 13:20

edit Well done, old chap

*strokes oversized moustache* Congratulations on the win, what what? Of course, I'm only congratulating you because I suggested the homophones topic in the first place, and yes, I'm seething with rage. *sips tea* EpicAwesomeness (talk) 16:55, February 20, 2012 (UTC)

Thank you. I was wondering who suggested it, and was going to ask, and you saved me some of that deep trouble. I hated the topic, thank you. I liked your page even though I'm very bad at maths, and early on I thought it might win. And I wouldn't have been surprised if ICameHereWithAClouce had won (what a great user name he has). There were some very good articles this year, and much fun was had by all. Eventually. Al 17:55 20-2-'12

edit What?

Why did you type "my fingers can make a rhombus no baby that's a shoe" on my userpage????

edit What?

Why did you type that on my talk page? Why are you talking about rhombuses and shoes?

Alex Devens 22:47, February 20, 2012 (UTC)

What? Wasn't me. Check the history of the page and then compare the differences to catch the culprit. We he using my name? I'll go look. Thanks for the alert. Aleister 22:56 20-2-'12
p.s. Was an IP. He used a "P.S" though, which is something I like to use. God Speed, IP. Aleister 23:00 20-2-'12

edit I'm backkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk, yes i'm backkkkkkkkkkkk, back in black, backkkkkkk innnn blackkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk

I had some time to write a new article. But I have not submitted it yet, User:Maniac1075/Deal or No Deal. Print it out (you must print it, it's important), have a read, tell me what you think, let me know if it can be improved,... then I want you to put that printed paper in a nice shiny envelope, polish it up real nice for The Rock, then turn that somebitch sideways, find the Yellow M&M, and stick it straight up, his candy ass!!!! If you smelllllllllllllllllllllllllllllalalalalala, through my farts, what my bitch, was cookin' for dinner last night that I just farted out and it smelled damn good, even for a fart.... give you a hint, it was a Mexican dish!

P.M.S: I pooped out some new shit on that A diary of the day in the life of myself, man, thing!--ManiacJaSg-Maniac1075Complain Here 07:30, February 21, 2012 (UTC)

There is a poetry in your writing. Words that capture life as it is in the bowels of the forest primeval after it had fermented in its own humidity for a few million years. I'll look at both pages later, after my detox-suit comes back from the cleaners. Thanks, and good to have you back and writing a new page. Aleister 11:17 21-2-'12

edit Don't worry about anything

I don't take things personally that people say on talk pages.

Also, guess how many pages I've stuck a fix tag on? I can't remember clearly, but I think the total is somewhere around five. I'm more of a VFD guy. ~ BB ~ (T) Icons-flag-usTue, Feb 21 '12 10:00 (UTC)

Which is a different kettle of fish. Vincent Valentine is one that should have a community consensus on. {{fix}} doesn't allow for that. Pup 10:28 21 Feb '12
Oh, five? You sounded like you were one of the serial killers, those users who are proud of their pelts (the forest fire week killed thousands of pages, probably a few hundred good ones, and was used to try to get rid of categories and pages one user just didn't like). I'm going to have to look at this Vincent Valentine that everyone keeps talking about, and huff it. hahahahahahaaheeheeheeheehee Aleister 11:11 21-2-'12
I'm proud of deleting the BAD pages. I dunno if any of the ones I've put {{Fix}} tags on have gotten the axe yet, but I doubt it. I just take issue with people who say a page should be saved because it's significant. The only thing that should save a page is the fact that it is funny, or has been fixed. And I'm a little worried that if people make a big enough drama fuss over the "indiscriminate" use of the {{Fix}} tag, people will stop using it, or disappear off the site altogether. ~ BB ~ (T) Icons-flag-usTue, Feb 21 '12 12:41 (UTC)
Then a middle ground should be sought, where everyone is unhappy. Why not change Fix status to unhuffable, to be used as a suggestion tag, and put the horrible pages and ICU DOA's (there must be thousands of those) in a new section at the bottom of VFD, where anyone can take one off - but if they stay for 36 hours they get huffed. When I view a death penalty Fix tag on a good article what comes to mind is the energy and care people took to write the page, and often their pages are being judged and discarded at a rate of ten a minute. That seems excessive (I've got one on my user pages now, either Isaac Asimov or Steve Jobs, which was huffed because a vandal had collapsed the page and put up a single stupid paragraph - it seems that nobody checked to see if there was a history to the page). And I don't know if this subject constitutes drama, as we are discussing users work falling under what amounts to a one-person VFD loophole that's already in place, a pretty important or disputed subject. Thanks. Aleister 13:00 21-2-'12
Psst... Have a look at the bottom of VFD. Pup 01:09 21 Feb '12
How did that get there? Does it have to be kept updated? And some older pages are so obviously bad that everyone would agree on huffing. Enough of this site for now, I'm leaving! (at least for a few hours, then I'll be drawn back in, back in I tell ya!) Thanks for pointing out the VFD thing, I just "saved" Dog food from a faith worse than Kept. Aleister 13:27 21-2-'12

edit Beloved Aleister

How are you my immortal beloved? TKF inspired me to get back to Playstation 5 which was stagnating. I've cleaned it up a little so that the frame is there and its absurdity is the most maximum possible, but I cannot think of a secondary theme to put into it. You know how I write these pee reviews and I can come up with 100 secondary concepts for other people articles? I can never do that for my own. So...I thought...maybe Ali can. I'm utterly stumped. Utterly. Help? --ShabiDOO 04:46, February 23, 2012 (UTC)

Two things that popped into my mind:-
  1. BTL: Better Than Life taken from Red Dwarf, although more related to the books. The game is so immersive that it becomes a drug, where people don't want to leave, and eventually they die of starvation/dehydration due to being unable to care for themselves in the real world, or get removed from the game physically which causes them to die from shock. The principle is not far from what you have here. Not original though, unfortunately.
  2. Porn The Internet is technically the largest library in the world, yet in appears to be festooned with pornography. (This isn't completely accurate, but is a common enough misconception to go on.) Assume you have people going into a completely immersive world like this - woukdn't it make sense that they would use it for virtual sex? Does PS5 sex constitute infidelity? What is the impact on procreation? If it slows down the population explosion amongst the rich, does this reduce the impact that the 1% have on the 99%? Does the distribution of wealth become fairer as a result? Do the new leaders emerge from the ranks of the previously dispossessed and create a Utopian world, all due to the impact of PS5. (I'm thinking of Bill and Ted being responsible for world peace and reducing pollution - that kind of feel.)
That's my initial thoughts. Al may have better ones, or you might be able to use these. I'd like to see the far-reaching impacts of PS5 go from the sublime to the ridiculous though. That's the angle that I see it start in, and it's an angle that you can't really overdo.
Oh, and we're talking about the result of something in the future. Is the introduction of PS5 somehow related to thought moving after than the speed of light, and as a result are people able to move backwards in time in an astral form and change things, like an uncyclopedia entry that is based on electronic binary patterns? Pup 09:40 23 Feb '12
Follow up thought. If people are able to travel through time in a non-material form, could they be witnessed interacting with the present and the past, and actually be the root of "ghost" stories? Or somehow their playing historical characters be the reason why modern people have past life memories, and hence why there can be 50 people who believe they were Cleopatra as she is part of a popular role playing game? Could Shakespeare have been influenced by them enough to write Julius Caesar? Pup 09:46 23 Feb '12
Another idea. The person reading this article is actually trapped inside a PS5 game in a BTL/Matrix type fashion. Halfway through the article it breaks into someone from the outside trying to reach the reader/player in a Matrix "follow the white rabbit" fashion. The only way to get out is to go to The Really Big Button That Doesn't Do Anything but it will only get them out if they truly believe they are in a fantasy realm. Pup 09:57 23 Feb '12
I'm glad I could be of help, and don't hesitate to come to me again for more great story ideas. Your article is just a few of these storylines away from a VFD nomin roll of the dice on VFH. And no thanks necessary. Anytime. Aleister 10:21 23-2-'12
Your concepts bring all the boys to the yard... Pup 10:40 23 Feb '12
To be serious, those are very good ideas and make me want to read the finished page. If all of them are used in combinations that dazzle the senses then the page will live up to its title. I put something distantly related in the "Game Cube" section of Nintendo. And if you have a minute take a look at this for fun and prophet.Aleister 10:50 23-2-'12
Thanks Aleister...your various suggestions have been masterful as always. I really apreciate your various edits and ideas Aleister and I owe you a big favour. I particularly like these two ideas:
  • trapped in the box
  • from the sublime to the absurd...its so obviously simple I didnt even consider it.

Once again are a credit to this website, and I thank you once again for your genius ideas ;) ;) ;) --ShabiDOO 22:00, February 23, 2012 (UTC)

No prob, blood. I'm always glad to come up with ideas for good writers, and on this one I spent quite a bit of time biding my time, and let just the right gems emerge as I sat and watched ("That's right," said Gem). Let me know when you kick it into overdrive. Al 22:18 23-2-'12
It seems like i simply cannot say thankyou enough times. It was also really kind of you to ask puppy to leave a summary of your suggestions and ideas. Your ideas were incredible. Thanks again Ali. THANKS!!! --ShabiDOO 23:51, February 24, 2012 (UTC)
No prob, blood. Stick it to the man, merry christmas Kramer, and time travel to Kingston. That's what I say. Serious side, I actually thought Puppy's ideas were very good, and you didn't need any more. Puppy has a mind like a steel rat trap. Let me know if you still want me to look at it. Thanks. Aleister 1:02 25-2-'12
Yes - anything that goes into my mind gets maimed, crushed, and cut open and all it's inner fluids left to dribble down to a goopy reddish brown mess. Pup 01:17 25 Feb '12
Rockin'. (You may be able to tell I'm watchihg "School of Rock", one the most underrated films in history imnho). That trap thing was meant as a compliment. And just so you know, every time a bum on the street tries to give me money I'm grateful to Jah, my random Savior. Puppy, you gave some great ideas up there! Aleister 1:30 25-2-'12
You dont have to go over it, pups ideas were great. As per School of Rock, I have no idea at all what movie that is. Is it sort of like Mozart´s opera "Cosi fan Tutti"? --ShabiDOO 01:34, February 25, 2012 (UTC)
Oprah? Cozy fan titty? What are you... no, if you haven't seen it yet the very best way is to watch it with as little information about it as you can (optimum - have someone start it for you so you don't even see any of the give-away scenes that movie companies sometimes put into the menu. Aleister 1:43 25-2-'12

edit Yes, please, do

Nom Womp Rat it's ready, bro!--Funnybony Icons-flag-th Agnideva-small.jpg AGT-logo-small.jpg 21:19, Feb 28

Is there any relationship between womp rats and ROUS (rodents of unusual size) from the Princess Bride? Pup 10:21 28 Feb '12

edit lol

suurrree! -- UserTalkContributions 23:44, February 28, 2012 (UTC)

I wouldn't mind someone editing my SIG, as long as they have a good reason too. And the reason I changed his/her SIG is because, It sometimes corrupt other wiki markups from canceling. And the text on your page looked as if it was fading out, getting bigger, and the problem was that the </big> markup wasn't in place, meaning this:<big> wasn't canceling, at the end of her SIG. :P -- UserTalkContributions 23:50, February 28, 2012 (UTC)
I have no idea what you're saying, but it sounds smart enough to know what you're talking about. I've come back here to post an Unnews page on leap year, happy Feb. 29th! Al few minutes later into February 29, 2012
Whose sig? And as for your sig and the <br /> - there are rules about sig height/length. One of those is that it can't go over more than a line (15px?) height. A line break does exactly that. I don't know why you're editing Al's page about this though. All he did was revert your subst'ing of Shabby's sig. Unlike another wiki I know, we prefer to keep sigs in templates. Pup 12:46 29 Feb '12
ah. Just saw the change you made to Shabby's sig within the template. Good call. You should explain to Shabidoo as well . Pup 12:55 29 Feb '12
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