User:Aleister in Chains/Yikes!

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia

Jump to: navigation, search

Don't move too fast around this guy, he thinks he's a gobbily-gook or something. If you fluster him and start to see his lip get all crinkley like he's trying to smile but has lost touch with his inner-child, don't panic. And whatever you do, don't run. Bend down and pretend you're eating grass or grubs or something, avoid eye-contact, and soon he'll go away and try to smile at someone else.

Yikes! An exclamation said after running up on something running down, looking for a pen in a drawer and finding unspeakable things crawling up your arm, or opening a package from your best friend and discovering the severed head of your other best friend (true story!).

Benefactor's are the least likely to embrace the word, and malcontents will pick it up and shake it to see what falls out. Forsaking, totally accepting, and loving all other exclamations, Yikes! clambors on alone up a steep and windy mountainside until it sits atop, overseeing its mental creation, which it could just have easily done while reclining in a lawnchair by the pool[1].

And while some underplay or overplay the power of Yikes!, the wise, according to the steet sage Leon the Thumbs, embrace it for what it is: a Y, followed by I ("Why followed by I" answers most metaphyscial questions, according to Leon), trailed by K entwined with E ("The shape KE and its friends, Ke, ke, and kE, contain all sexual positions and the power therein" Leon told his followers at a luncheon one day), then an S ("A giant S" Leon cryptically said, possibly eluding to a video or an experience he had with his own tantric partner/guru, Susan), and, finally, ending with an exclamation point: ! ("An exclamation point is actually an entire chapter in Crowley's The Book of Lies" wrote Leon in his 2008 poetry-based manifesto The Meaning Of ! And HowTo Put It At The End Of Things).

edit Overuse of the word Yikes!

If Yikes! is used too often or for things too trivial to even mention, it loses it's power, and must be recharged in a circle on the floor of some occulty kind, a circle with things lurking about its edges which it would be alright to say Yikes! about. Even mandatory given the extreme circumstances. Yikes!

edit Surpised and what to do about it

edit Reeferences

  1. When he read this the street guru Leon said "When you understand that sentence you have achieved nirvana, or something close enough to it that you might as well grab a sandwich."


This needs work, needs to have more than ramblings and a deconstruction of its spelling. "Yikes," you see, is no ordinary expression; it is an expression uttered by a Pogo Possum or Mickey Mouse, accompanied by a lurch backward as though shot in the chest or pulled back by a stunt-man's wire, with those lines radiating from the utteror's head, and maybe a little blushing (illustration! examples!), over an event that is shockingly revolting, in a trivial way. Spıke Ѧ 13:58, 15:57 26-Dec-10

Thanks for the review and ideas. It's on a user page now because I've just started it, and your suggestions will be taken under utmost consideration, except for the word "rambling" at the start, which I will take and treasure as a SPIKE insult. A badge of honour, that. Aleister 21:39 26 12


Personal tools