User:02barryc/UnNews/12.5.06

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May 12th

Good Evening, the time is 9:05 UTC and this the UnNews Daily IRC Bulletin.
I'm BarryC, your presenter for tonight,
Todays' date is the 12th of May


On UnNews tonight our stories are:

  • Cure for Male Pattern Baldness
  • Religious far-left object to "Science" Voodoo
  • White House Tired of Telemarketers

Todays featured article is:
Cure for Male Pattern Baldness
Today, it was announced that a cure to male baldness had been discovered. Writing in Conservative, traditional newspapers, Fathers said they would expect to be "with healthy looks into their 80's". Teenagers, writing on ED and in magazines, said that they would no longer feel ashamed out in public with their fathers. However, many eminent Medical figures say that the process of inserting a metal tube into the colon and procuring electical shocks could prove hazourdous to proper bladder function.


Taking a look at other, less creditable news sources:

  • Scores die in Nigeria fuel blast
  • US lambasted on secret detainees
  • Match-fixing probe rocks Serie A

Taking a look at the Weather tommorow:

  • There will be more light rain in Liverpool
  • There will be a pandemic of sunshine in the USA, authorities say the problem is under control
  • And finally, thunderstorms are on the way to Europe, analysts say that this will lower the price of electricity, forecasting lower profits for the next quater than expected.

That's all for now, I'm BarryC and that was the Daily UnNews IRC Bulletin.

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