Unidentified Jedi Council member

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia

(Redirected from Unknown Jedi Council member)
Jump to: navigation, search
Whoops! Maybe you were looking for Unidentified man in green firing turret?

Man, myth, legend...the Hero with No Name.

In the Jedi High Council, there are twelve members at a time, a majority of which are never identified during the three Star Wars prequel films. Sources such as Wookieepedia, books, comic books, video games, trading cards, toothbrushes, and cereal boxes reveal the names of these characters.

However, one male Jedi Council member was to remain unidentified, and that is whom this page is about. Some fans have given him the nickname "Crest", due to his crest-shaped head, but EU sources assure fans this is not his name, though they don't tell us what his name actually is.

edit Biography

For those interested in the full story, the self-proclaimed experts at Wookieepedia think they have an article about Unidentified Jedi Council member.
For those without comedic tastes, the so-called experts at Wikipedia think they have an article about Unidentified Jedi Council member.

edit Early life

Unidentified Jedi Council member was born Unidentified alien baby in an undetermined BBY year[1] a long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away. His homeworld was most likely Tatooine or Boz Pity, or maybe Saturn.[2] As for species, him being a Vurk is a likely candidate.[3]

edit Unidentified Jedi Council member, Be a Jedi Tonight

As a Jedi, Unidentified Jedi Council member did not start off as a Jedi Council member. He started off as a Padawan, then through a process of training, training, more training, and being mindful of the living Force, ascended to the rank of Jedi Knight, followed by Jedi Master, and finally Jedi Master with a seat on the Jedi Council.

In 22 BBY (13:5:16), Unidentified Jedi Council member was seen as a unidentified member of the Jedi Council, seated in a very comfortable chair.[4] But by 19 BBY (16:5:20), he was no longer there.[5] So, either he died or resigned in-between those three years.

For a certain period of time, Unidentified Jedi Council member's fate was unknown, with first-hand accounts only saying he "fought at the Battle of Geonosis".[6] This was due to change, however.[7]

edit Death


Unidentified Jedi Council member confronts Dooku.

As revealed later on,[8] Unidentified Jedi Council member was killed in the Geonosis Arena during the First Battle of Geonosis. His death came during an attempt on Count Dooku's life; a fatal mishap during what could've been a pivotal moment in his life. During the battle, he jumped up to where Count Dooku was perched, along with Jango Fett.[9]

With his lightsaber activated, Unidentified Jedi Council member was about to take on Dooku, when Fett shot him several times in the chest with blaster bolts. After being shot, he fell off the edge of the platform to the ground, an approximate 53.78 ft. drop. The last words of Unidentified Jedi Council member weren't heard by anyone, but it is likely that they were very gruffly-delivered.[9]

Luckily for Unidentified Jedi Council member, Jango later got his head chopped off and Count Dooku was killed in 19 BBY.[4] It is possible that this was an act of comeuppance on the Force's part.[10]

edit Legacy

Being a deceased member of the Jedi Council, a bust of Unidentified Jedi Council member's head was made and placed in the Jedi Archives to be preserved for future generations. Sadly, the bust did not give his name and we were not able to find him in the archives themselves.[11]

Unidentified Jedi Council member's spot on the Jedi Council was filled by Kit Fisto, a much cooler and more well-known Jedi Master.[11] It is often said that if Unidentified Jedi Council member had succeeded in killing Dooku right then and there, the Clone Wars could have been averted.[12]

edit Personality and traits

Not to be confused with the Unidentified man in green firing turret, this creature known as Unidentified Jedi Council member had the power of the Force, a power given to organisms with high midi-chlorian counts in their blood.[13] He fought with a lightsaber, a glowing stick of energy that comes in any color you'd like, in this case being green.[9]

It is not known whether Unidentified Jedi Council member was particularly skilled in the ways of the Force, considering he got shot very quickly by Jango Fett and was unable to deflect his blaster shots.[9] Some speculate that he was merely playing dumb, so he could die, become a Force Ghost, and haunt Count Dooku in his sleep.[14]

edit Behind the scenes


Unidentified Jedi Council member's first appearance in Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones.

Unidentified Jedi Council member first appeared in the film Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones, released on May 16, 2002. The scene of him being shot by Dooku was cut by Lucas for "personal reasons". A DVD titled Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones – Sooper Cool Platinum Special Edition was released by 20th Century Fox Home Entertainment on November 12, 2002. It restored his death scene, and also changed his eye color from black to blue.

Since making his debut to the world, fans have attempted to uncover the identity of Unidentified Jedi Council member. They have given him the nickname "Crest" because of the crest on his head, although "Dinosaur Man" and "Ugly" have also be used. According to Lucas on the DVD commentary for Attack of the Clones, his name is not "Crest", and he hasn't given him an actual name, because he doesn't give a shit about the EU. He's just an alien Jedi, nothing more, nothing less.[15]

edit Appearances

edit See also

  • Mace Windu – A Motherfucking Jedi Master who sat on the Jedi Council at the same time Unidentified Jedi Council member was in the Council. English mothefucker, I don't think his species spoke it.
  • Yoda – A Jedi Master on the Jedi Council, Yoda was. Sat on the Council at the same time Unidentified Jedi Council member was in the Council, Yoda did. Before the Dark Times, before the Empire. Yearn for those times, Yoda does.
  • Obi-Wan Kenobi – A barmy British Jedi Master who sat on Her Majesty's Jedi Council at the same time that bloomin' pointy-headed bloke laid his bum on a Council seat.

edit Notes and references

  1. Time in the Star Wars universe is reckoned using as a basis the exact moment in A New Hope when the Stormtrooper entering the control room on the Death Star bangs his head on the door and yells. Using this system, events occurring before this moment are designated BBY (before bang/yell), and events after ABY.
  2. The Essential Atlas
  3. The Essential Guide to Alien Species
  4. 4.0 4.1 Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones
  5. Star Wars Episode III: Revenge of the Sith
  6. The New Essential Chronology
  7. The All-New Essential Chronology Special Edition, edited by George Lucas
  8. Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) – "The Wacky Geonosis Adventure"
  9. 9.0 9.1 9.2 9.3 Star Wars Episode II: Attack of the Clones – Sooper Cool Platinum Special Edition
  10. The Force for Dummies
  11. 11.0 11.1 Star Wars: Obsession – Issue #3: "Fisto's Disco"
  12. Jedi Reading Digest: Were the Clone Really Necessary?
  13. Some fans dispute this, arguing: "Midi-chlorians are from the prequels, which were made after George Lucas lost his fucking mind. This guy has the Force because he's cool, not because of some stupid midi-chlorians."
  14. HoloNet News #1138: 10-year-old pilot of Millennium Falcon claims: "Jedi are stupid."
  15. Lucas, George (2002). Commentary for Star Wars Episode II: Jar Jar's Big Adventure [DVD]. 20th Century Fox.
Personal tools