University of Louisville
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“Where the fuck am I?”
“Maybe one day they will be good enough to wipe my ass.”
University of Louisville (also known as U of L) is a public university in Louisville, Kentuckistan. It is famous for there mutated teethy bird that was create in 1973 which quickly became the mascot. Majority of the students are commuters and drive there horse and buggy. When not in classes students are in the gym working out and getting ready for the 'big game'.
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[edit] History
University of Louisville was founded and built by 14 thoroughbred horses in 1798. It was a time of uncertainty of horse rights but because of this horses from all around the world immigrated in fear of discrimination and rising glue prices. Since then human have taken over by Daniel Boone in 1863 and the horses were marched to Churchill Downs(horse death camp) and have been there ever since.
After locals where criticized that they were not preparing their students for the 'ride' of life they build a theme park on the campus. The students enjoyed the new balls to walls teaching approach. This caused the medical students to earn the highest scores on wack-a-mole in the country for the last 23 years. One student quoted for saying "if your boss head person asked what I leard in school I can say I leard that you get more action with girls on the fast bumpy rides, y'all know?"
In 1966 the classic roller coaster "Hard wood" was set on fire when a fucking god damn George foreman grill exploded in the SAC located right under the wooden joy. 135 people died which caused an outrage in the community toward George foreman grills. So much so that they banned George foreman grills and anything that look like one(example PS3) Three years later the ride was rebuilt and named "Morning Wood". The replacement has been getting mixed reviews by men mainly do to the fact they teach females in history on it.
[edit] Food Chicken
The University supplies there students and staff the best chickens that they can find in a 24mile radius. The choices of different type of food that they offer is endless. From chicken nuggets to chicken salad even chicken flavor soda. The only time when chicken wasn't severed was during the bird flu and in its place Capybara was given.
Recently UofL started diplomatic talks with the great chicken nations of the world. After years of talking with all the nations UofL agreed to side with Chick-fil-a. This came as a surprise since UofL didn't side with their neighboring chicken nation KFC and because of this the arteries between each other became clogged with distrust. Soon after Chick-fil-a built an embassy which the students can freely exchange their money for chicken.
[edit] Sports
UofL has a different approach in beating there opponents in basketball and football. Instead of the traditional approach of training their player to the best of their abilities UofL mixes it up and builds HUGE ASS stadiums to paralyze their enemies in fear to crush them to pieces. Sadly it hasn't worked at expected to most team. But it has worked wonders against IU.
[edit] Graduates
Colonel Sanders
Mind that Bird great great great great grandfather
That guy that drives a truck and cuts you off when driving.
Mr. Mime
Angry German kid
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You need to expand this into a full article by working on it some more. MrN    16:57, Feb 5
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