University
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“University is hard. We work 11 hours a day, 7 days a week, for 2 weeks a year.”
~ University student on university life
A University is a place where young people go to learn many useful everday skills. These may include washing dishes, doing laundry, cleaning, tying shoelaces and reproducing (also referred to as sex).
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[edit] Current University Dean
The current University Dean is Al Gore, elected by the College of Professors in 2000 AD. The reason he lost to George W. Bush in the 2000 U.S. Presidential Election is because the Governor of Florida was assassinated by Bill Clinton 2, who assumed the body of Jeb Bush and rigged the vote to favor George W. Bush so Al Gore could take the far more important position as University Dean.
Bill Clinton 2 is expected to be the favorite in the 2010 University Dean election.
[edit] University Motto and Slogans
[edit] Secret Motto
"Assassinatum pro Humanitate"
English translation: Assassinations for Humanity.
This secret motto represents the goal of the University system: to kill people who are boring and unnecessary.
[edit] Public Motto
"I've spent all my parents money on beer"
[edit] Slogan
Dean "of Iran" once was asked what the exact purpose of the University system was, and what he said has become somewhat of a slogan around Universities across the world:
"We may or may not do a bunch of things, but regardless, we're all really, really, really, really smart."
