Unemployment
From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia.
Unemployment is when a person or grapefruit is unable to obtain regular work, regular work excluding public service jobs cause they don't work. It is a growing trend in America because of outsourcing and mp3 players that let you watch movies on 2cm wide screens. For further information on unemployment speak to darren dizon, artist, or any other person of black, asian or espanic heritage.
[edit] Unemployment in history
Recent findings of various fossils, some as old as 4,000,000 years indicate that our early ancestors had nothing better to do than to evolve, yet some became extinct, probably since evolutionary volunteers were present in abundance and they were laid off, or something. Scholars conclude, that they were likely unemployed since their qualifications were not matching the ever-changing labour-market. Imagine a fletcher trying to make a flintstone knife? Impossible!
More recent fossils and archaeological findings, including ancient Egypt and Greece, shed some interesting light on that subject. It is understood that some unemployed members of otherwisely productive societies were so bored that they went totally bonkers and started to hallucinate (compare Myth, Religion and Philosophy). Some, due to lacking support from their governmental support agencies committed gruesome acts of crime and looked for support in communities other then the one that had abandoned them.
Ancient Greek philosophers developed some seriously convincing theories on existence, whilst sitting all day in their jammies in the forum. Hence, they must have been unemployed and were able to come up with that kind of stuff.
In more modern times unemployed, since unproductive, albeit unqualified and completely unable of a straight thought, have been pushed towards the edges of societies and were henceforth outcasts. Most of them have retaliated and became politicians and lawyers.
[edit] Unemployment as a stigma
In the modern world it is canon that being unemployed is a bad thing. Of course it is, you can't even buy the most basic stuff, like a car, rent a DVD or go out fancy with your pals, your girlfriend, or improve your social standing by being seen in the company of an attractive escort.
Nonetheless in most western societies "being unemployed" has become something of a stigma, even though there is quite basically no-one in the family who never was unemployed. Which would suggest, that it is some sorf of sexually transmitted disease, much like life, yet seems to be curable and non-lethal.
