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For those obsessed with experts, Uncyclopedia has an article about: Bonsai.

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Bonsai (plural Bonsais)

  1. An Italian species of cat that comes in small glass containers of different shapes. They generally are difficult to shape and require large amounts of care to grow correctly. Because they are unable to reproduce naturally, when one dies, it is reincarnated as a kitten in another glass container. Highly prized because glass containers make them easier to huff.
  2. Japanese slang for inadequate appendage.
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