Uncyclopedian Spacetime Flaw Delta-9

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia

Jump to: navigation, search

Confidential Letter No. 7-6-0-3
Sent: 2009-6-3
Released to Public 2010-5-30

Good evening, Gentlemen.
I am sorry to interrupt what must have been a perfect evening until now. I have discovered a shocking flaw in the fabric of time and space that could result in the untimely destruction of Uncyclopedia. At the current rate Uncyclopedia is progressing I am pained to tell you that within four years the site will have lost structural integrity and will collapse. Perhaps you are wondering what I am talking about. I am, of course, referring to the Uncyclopedian Spacetime Flaw Delta-9, or USFD9. USFD9 is, essentially, a rip in the fabric of time and space.

edit The Event that caused the creation of USFD9

The event that caused USFD9 to come into existence was none other than the ceaseless editation of continuity by the Uncyclopedia editors. Let us observe, for instance, the iCarly article. The article has changed indefinitely since its inception. The entire plot of the program was rewritten as the article was broken down and built back up. But this building back up results in a continuity shift. Where does the original continuity go? It falls into a hole that has opened in the cyberspace, resulting in it falling through into oblivion. However, due to the current mass index of oblivion it will soon be full and therefore unusable.

edit What will happen then?

The changed continuity will then explode out of oblivion into the Uncyclopedia database. The colossal release of energy will cause the servers to implode upon impact, resulting in every atom in the Wikia Central building where Uncyclopedia is housed to be ripped apart, atom by atom.

edit And then what?!

The shockwave will ripple around the earth like a fart by Chuck Norris. The world will end within 6 minutes, just seconds slower than a Norris flatus event. Not only this, but several memes will escape into the world. Several grues will nom people. Sophia the Potato will go on a homicidal rampage and consume all within her field of vision.

edit Do you know of anything to remedy this?

I am glad you asked. I am going to release this letter into the world on the 30th of May 2010. This letter will serve as a 'continuity clip' that will save the world. I just hope nobody vandalises the letter or we will all be dooTHE JOENUS BROTHRS R GAI


Personal tools