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==[[HowTo:Cut Your Own Head Off With a Chainsaw]]==
==[[HowTo:Cut Your Own Head Off With a Chainsaw]]==
{{S|+22 ''quite'' dangerous unsafe methods}}
{{S|+23 ''quite'' dangerous unsafe methods}}
'''Featured''' {{User:Braydie/sig2}} <small>01:03, 10 March 2007 (UTC)</small>
'''Featured''' {{User:Braydie/sig2}} <small>01:03, 10 March 2007 (UTC)</small>

Revision as of 01:26, March 10, 2007

Top 10 articles
of February
  • Vote for an article you find excellent. Please add new nominations on the top.
    • Initial nominations do not count as a vote For. Please use "Nomination and For" or some iteration thereof if you wish to vote for your nomination.
    • When voting For or Against, please change the score number accordingly—this saves a lot of time later.
    • IP votes carry half the weight of registered votes.
    • Nonsigned votes and votes without timestamps will be struck out, so make sure you sign your votes with ~~~~ or press the "your signature with timestamp" button (Button sig) above the edit box.
    • When nominating an article, the template Template:VFH should be added to the end of the article using {{VFH}}. Anything you add {{VFH}} to also shows up in Category:Feature nomination.
  • Failed VFH nominations should only be archived/removed by the sysops who pay attention to this sort of thing.
  • Previous featured articles can be found on the archive pages.
  • Voters: don't be dicks and do be constructive with criticism. Writers: Don't be prima donnas. Be open to criticism.
  • Articles from all namespaces (including UnNews, HowTo, UnBooks, etc.) are eligible for VFH. Votes against articles based on namespace prejudice will be discarded.
  • If your article doesn't make it to the front page, don't despair. It may be eligible to be Quasi-featured so long as it meets certain criteria.
THIS IS A VOTE, NOT A DISCUSSION. If you feel the need to whine or start flamewars please do it HERE.
Violators of this policy will be 20-hit combo'd.

Current Nominations (new stuff at top, prefix votes with * )

SELF-NOMINATION REGULATION: self-nominated articles (i.e. you write an article and then decide to nominate it yourself) must spend at least one week on pee review before nomination. Articles nominated by people other than the author can still be nominated at any time and require no review (though it is still recommended).

VANITY REGULATION: Articles that meet the criteria for vanity may not be nominated.

VFH IS NOT A DISCUSSION PAGE. If you'd like constructive criticism for your article, please submit it to Uncyclopedia:Pee Review.

ACI Mondays

Score: +0 stolen potate
  • Nom The preceding unsigned comment was added by (talk • contribs)
  • Weak Against it's a good concept, but the images suck and it needs general cleanup.--Yoshi-TRM 23:15, 9 March 2007 (UTC)
  • it's good, but the writing needs a fair amount of tidying before this'll feature - jack mort | cunt | talkKodamaIcon - 23:44, 9 March 2007 (UTC)
  • Self nom im still a newbie, if i am not alloud to vote for myself, go ahead and remove this, because i'm just a an innocent teenager! how would i know better?? teehee--Reubnick 00:04, 10 March 2007 (UTC)
  • Against: Clever concept, but poor implementation. -- Rei 00:20, 10 March 2007 (UTC)

1846 Uncyclopedia Convention at Aurora, New York

Score: +4 orgies of drunkenness, debauchery and bingo games

Assassins from the future

Score: +4 exploding cloned sheep

I maed a yuky doody

Score: -0.5 yuky doodys

UnNews:Barbie robs bank, further pads résumé

Score: +8 Stolen Mattel Merchandise

Good cop/Bad cop

Score: +7 split personalities
  • Nom and For A grand old Fundlebuggy. It even got transwikied. --Alksubsig.gifAlksub - VFH CM WA RV {talk} 21:14, 8 March 2007 (UTC)
  • for. superb. where is hardwick anyway - jack mort | cunt | talkKodamaIcon - 23:37, 8 March 2007 (UTC)
I was wondering that myself. One can of special brew too many. Woke up in a desert. Isn't that always the way? --Sir Hardwick Fundlebuggy - (Ring for service) 04:32, 9 March 2007 (UTC)


Score: +11 linear accelerators funded


Score: +1 Goats surfed upon
  • Self Nom + for Because Goats are Under-rated as an eco-transportation method. MikeSouthgate 18:58, 7 March 2007 (UTC)
  • Comment and against Not sure, but I don't think I saw this on Pee Review. If I'm not mistaken I do believe it needs to spend a week on it, for it to be selected, if it is a self nom. --Shadowlost 04:14, 8 March 2007 (UTC)
Comment. This was indeed on pee review. I checked when it was nommed.--<<Bradmonogram.png>> 13:27, 8 March 2007 (UTC)
  • Against Though it was on pee review, it still needs some more jokes and cleanup. --Alksubsig.gifAlksub - VFH CM WA RV {talk} 06:48, 8 March 2007 (UTC)
  • For --”' PrincessCaitlai ”' (”'T”') 17:18, 8 March 2007 (UTC)
  • For - jack mort | cunt | talkKodamaIcon - 23:42, 8 March 2007 (UTC)
  • For with reservations Funny due to its absurdity, as are many things on Uncyclopedia. I've cleaned it a bit myself, corrected spellings and added some pics. If someone had the time to give it a proper re-write, I reckon it could be a good bit of work. {{ 18:22, 9 March 2007 (UTC)}}

HowTo:Lose Weight

Score: +3

Tony the Tiger

Score: +5 Frosties kids

The Aeneid: A Research Paper About the Aeneid

Score: +9 dilligent students

UnNews:Overly political spider becoming annoying

Score: +17 political propagandae in spider webs

Is a 1982 Mitsubishi Colt better than a Bugatti Veyron?

Score: +11 thousand Mitsubishi Colts in Cs1987's army
  • Nom and for, there was a reason why I didn't nom this earlier, but I've forgotten what it was.--<<Bradmonogram.png>> 02:52, 5 March 2007 (UTC)
Possibly because it could be merged with HowTo:Make a 1982 Mitsubishi Colt better than a Bugatti Veyron, but I ain't going to do it. Those articles are just too different. Icons-flag-au Sir Cs1987 UOTM. t. c 10:39, 5 March 2007 (UTC)

UnNews:Astronauts starting to suspect no one is coming for them

Score: +11.5 recycled saltines
  • Nom and for --GeorgeRI.jpg» His Majesty King George VI (the boxes) SpacerSpacerSpacerSpacerSpacerSpacerIcons-flag-gb 30px-Coatsmxa.pngSpacerSpacerSpacerIcons-flag-usSpacerSpacerSpacer 00:00, 5 March 2007 (UTC)
  • For, because I must vote for my own articles, per regulations.--<<Bradmonogram.png>> 01:33, 5 March 2007 (UTC)
  • For, because I too must vote for my own articles, per regulations. --Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 01:45, 5 March 2007 (UTC) ...hey, this isn't mine!
  • For, because I too must vote for my own articles, per regulations. I can pass as BradBraydie 01:46, 5 March 2007 (UTC)
  • Against, because I must vote against UnNews articles, per my beliefs. --User:Anidnmeno/sig 02:35, 5 March 2007 (UTC)
Uh, yeah. This vote violates the "Votes against articles based on namespace prejudice will be discarded." rule. FU ANIDNBraydie 02:38, 5 March 2007 (UTC)
  • For, because I too must vote for my own articles, per regulations. unfortunately, I didn't write this, but it's still a for --Contestant buzzer Contestant CUN -- VFH NotM Buzz Ctrbs 03:48, 5 March 2007 (UTC)
  • For --”' PrincessCaitlai ”' (”'T”') 16:25, 5 March 2007 (UTC)
  • for - jack mort | cunt | talkKodamaIcon - 23:47, 5 March 2007 (UTC)
  • For I remember someone spamming a link to this in IRC, and I read it. -- Brigadier General Sir Zombiebaron 02:28, 6 March 2007 (UTC)
  • For Is funny! --Cap'n Sir Ben GUN WotM VFH VFP 02:34, 6 March 2007 (UTC)
  • For Funny, and the pic in the article is one I uploaded. --Composure1 03:03, 6 March 2007 (UTC)
  • For. Anything that publicises the plight of those poor astronauts is a good thing. How have I not heard anything about this before? Something must be done. -- 15Mickey20 (talk to Mickey)  21:42, 6 March 2007 (UTC)
  • Against This article describes a true event. It does not hold up to the basic principles of uncyclopedia. 15:28, 7 March 2007 (UTC)
  • For. One of those articles for which I had to resist the urge based on its name alone. But the text itself delivers. User:Wehpudicabok/sig 01:32, 8 March 2007 (UTC)

Captain's log

Score: +9 Phaser of smiting
  • NOME AND FOR A great unrecognized article. Great humor, great pictures, The Article has it all. The preceding unsigned comment was added by Benny Goodman (talk • contribs)
diffBraydie 15:27, 4 March 2007 (UTC)


Score: +10 indisputable syllogisms [citation needed]

Dyslexia - there are two versions, take your pick

Score: +14 Need to double check their homweork
  • Self-nom and for. Got a mention on PLS, I'm fairly pleased with it. It also got 81 at pee review but that hardly counts since it was me who scored it - jack mort | cunt | talkKodamaIcon - 00:43, 3 March 2007 (UTC)
  • Against --GAMESPOT=666 03:57, 3 March 2007 (UTC)
  • For, I made it a bit better --GAMESPOT=666 22:48, 5 March 2007 (UTC)
The image seems fine as it is to me 14:39, 4 March 2007 (UTC)
Maybe "needs" is too strong a word. What I mean is, "what if it were like that, huh?" — Lenoxus 20:24, 4 March 2007 (UTC)

V8 Supercar

Score: +8 beer-swilling yobboes

H.R. Pufnstuf

Score: +15 Talking Diamond-Encrusted Flutes
  • Nom and For Fantastic, honorable mention at PLS. —Braydie 16:38, 20 February 2007 (UTC)
  • He's my friend when things get rough. THIS was my childhood people, thankfully it has had no lasting vegetable marrows. For. -- Sir Mhaille Icons-flag-gb (talk to me) 17:05, 20 February 2007 (UTC)
  • Yeah. Just like an acid trip, but without the flash backs. Iddy Bitty 21:10, 20 February 2007 (UTC)
  • I have no idea what this is based on and don't really want to know. All I can say is For. -- 15Mickey20 (talk to Mickey)  23:29, 20 February 2007 (UTC)
  • I'm all for freakin' out man! Aah! Bugs on my skin, bugs on my skin! --Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 23:47, 20 February 2007 (UTC)
  • For--Shandon 23:59, 20 February 2007 (UTC)
  • For.--Procopius 01:22, 21 February 2007 (UTC)
  • For ....hey is that a flute over there? - jack mort | cunt | talkKodamaIcon - 19:51, 21 February 2007 (UTC)
  • PHOUR CUZ I ER SEW JAKKD UP RIET NIOW. I loved this show. Not really, but this article is nice. --love, gustav talk at menope 22:51, 21 February 2007 (UTC)
  • For --Cap'n Sir Ben GUN WotM VFH VFP 00:45, 22 February 2007 (UTC)
  • For because this was my childhood too. Dame PPsigPPlips.gifGUN PotY WotM 2xPotM 17xVFH VFP Poo PMS •YAP• 03:26, 22 February 2007 (UTC)
  • For --”' PrincessCaitlai ”' (”'T”') 11:45, 22 February 2007 (UTC)
  • F☭R, SpacerSpacerPremierTomMayfairChe RedPhone Unsoc Hammer and sickle 17:53, 22 February 2007 (UTC)
  • For --Sir OCdt Jedravent CUN UmP VFH PLS ACS WH 19:32, 22 February 2007 (UTC)
  • For Better than the show itself, not a hard thing to do, but still - its better. Faster Pussycat Kill Kill 13:54, 27 February 2007 (UTC)

Mae Zedong

Score: +20.5 Party members rising
  • N&F - A work of art. Great idea, well executed, and some very nice images too. -- Sir Mhaille Icons-flag-gb (talk to me) 19:15, 16 February 2007 (UTC)
  • Self-For. The opening quote is Mhaille's, BTW.--Procopius 19:41, 16 February 2007 (UTC)
  • For. I wasn't involved at all in this page. --Sir Modusoperandi Boinc! 20:17, 16 February 2007 (UTC)
  • For. Yes. Oh, yes. R 21:29, 16 February 2007 (UTC)
  • For The first true lol of an article in a while. -- §. | WotM | PLS | T | C | A 22:26, 16 February 2007 (UTC)
  • For Brilliant. -- herr doktor needsAbeam Rocket [scream!] 00:53, 17 February 2007 (UTC)
  • For Mae West would've contracted and died of AIDS had she lived past 1980. Sorry I didn't light your fire mhaille. --AmericanBastard 01:17, 17 February 2007 (UTC)
  • For, although I am disappointed to see so many red links in a Procopius article. Icons-flag-au Sir Cs1987 UOTM. t. c 16:20, 17 February 2007 (UTC)
  • Comment. Me, too. They're fixed now.--Procopius 16:45, 17 February 2007 (UTC)
  • ForBraydie 00:53, 18 February 2007 (UTC)
  • F☭R, SpacerSpacerPremierTomMayfairChe RedPhone Unsoc Hammer and sickle 17:54, 19 February 2007 (UTC)
  • For - jack mort | cunt | talkKodamaIcon - 22:38, 19 February 2007 (UTC)
  • For the ever-hard workers of the world.—Lenoxus 05:54, 20 February 2007 (UTC)
  • For --Uncle J 15:38, 21 February 2007 (UTC)
  • For--Gaberou 05:51, 24 February 2007 (UTC)
  • For --”' PrincessCaitlai ”' (”'T”') 16:54, 4 March 2007 (UTC)
  • For. --Emmzee 13:54, 5 March 2007 (UTC)
  • FOR -- Pretty. Sir Àrd-Easbaig Gearcemeanaigh Mac Ádhaimh, UmP (Talk - Articles) Icons-flag-ie-Icons-flag-us KUN SEXY WH 01:31, 6 March 2007 (UTC)
  • Against - I don't see, why this article has to live from altered photos. I urge any real Mao-fan, who wants to see actual Mao pics to vote against this article. 15:42, 7 March 2007 (UTC)
  • For--Dr. Fenwick 00:40, 9 March 2007 (UTC)
  • For --Alksubsig.gifAlksub - VFH CM WA RV {talk} 02:27, 9 March 2007 (UTC)
  • For Featured Article is a great institution, but I'm not ready for an institution yet. But this article is. Well done! --Kenvalyi 04:28, 9 March 2007 (UTC)
  • For - quite edumacationalising. Pretty pictures, too. --El Zoof 11:38, 9 March 2007 (UTC)

Previously Featured

HowTo:Cut Your Own Head Off With a Chainsaw

Score: +23 quite dangerous unsafe methods

FeaturedBraydie 01:03, 10 March 2007 (UTC)

  • For Simple yet informative --HerrHATO 12:25, 9 March 2007 (UTC)
  • For Funny if short. Darkmojo 03:48, 8 March 2007 (UTC)
  • Self nom and For - Extremely useful advice. Many here should use it. --El Zoof 13:14, 6 March 2007 (UTC)
  • for. genius - jack mort | cunt | talkKodamaIcon - 13:21, 6 March 2007 (UTC)
  • weak for its ok better now due to the addition of the audio --Uncle J 13:34, 6 March 2007 (UTC)

The gurgling noises were funny lol --Uncle J 19:34, 7 March 2007 (UTC)

UnNews:Boy subjected to harsh criticism, cries like little girl.

Score: +21 Boys that Don't Cry

FeaturedBraydie 00:15, 9 March 2007 (UTC)

  • Re-Nom and for. The best thing I've taken off VFH in a while. This article definitely deserves another chance.--<<Bradmonogram.png>> 18:02, 25 February 2007 (UTC)
  • For. been long enough - jack mort | cunt | talkKodamaIcon - 04:08, 8 March 2007 (UTC)
  • Against. InfiniteMonkey 19:53, 25 February 2007 (UTC)
  • Wow....and I was just about to vote for this....FORE! -- Sir Mhaille Icons-flag-gb (talk to me) 19:56, 25 February 2007 (UTC)
  • Perhaps if the little boy had a bit of quiet time before being rush back for judgement here, he might be able to examine why he didn't make it last time against. Dame PPsigPPlips.gifGUN PotY WotM 2xPotM 17xVFH VFP Poo PMS •YAP• 22:15, 25 February 2007 (UTC)
  • For -- §. | WotM | PLS | T | C | A 23:22, 25 February 2007 (UTC)
  • For coming off due to the darwin rule doesnt make an article undeserving --GeorgeRI.jpg» His Majesty King George VI (the boxes) SpacerSpacerSpacerSpacerSpacerSpacerIcons-flag-gb 30px-Coatsmxa.pngSpacerSpacerSpacerIcons-flag-usSpacerSpacerSpacer 02:05, 26 February 2007 (UTC)
  • Against It's good, but there's better UnNews articles out there up for VFH right now. --Sir Judgement F@H UmP VFH {talk} 05:22, 26 February 2007 (UTC)
  • For --Cap'n Sir Ben GUN WotM VFH VFP 06:45, 26 February 2007 (UTC)
  • For --tinyubuntu.jpg Prof. Ahh(to the)Diddums[FUCK-A-DOODLE-DOO!] 07:47, 26 February 2007 (UTC)
  • Originally Nomed and Strong For -- Awesome article but you could have waited a bit longer to put in back on VFH, why did you take it off in the first place instead of vote for it? --Uncle J 14:08, 26 February 2007 (UTC)
  • Comment. Around Christmas, we had maybe a half-dozen articles that were removed, renommed, and then featured. I don't know why everyone's making such a huge deal about it right now. I didn't vote for the first time, because there was crap in it before. Now that crap is gone.--<<Bradmonogram.png>> 22:24, 26 February 2007 (UTC)
  • For It made my eyes well up.. in a very manly way. --Kenvalyi 16:16, 26 February 2007 (UTC)
  • For Wow, it's here once again. Anyway, before voting Against please note that some crap has been taken out of this article since last time...--AtomDsig.png 10:35, 4 March 2007 (UTC)
  • For, again --GAMESPOT=666 22:28, 26 February 2007 (UTC)
  • For --Sir OCdt Jedravent CUN UmP VFH PLS ACS WH 22:31, 26 February 2007 (UTC)
  • For --Hotadmin4u69 [TALK] 00:57, 27 February 2007 (UTC)
  • For --”' PrincessCaitlai ”' (”'T”') 01:03, 27 February 2007 (UTC)
  • For Hes crying like a bitch Weasel Weasel 3689Sucrose b Colombia icon 18:07, 27 February 2007 (UTC)
  • Comment I Just checkd this page again and IT IS STILL NOT FEATURED! Look at the above timestamp and my below one!! I voted for the previousl featured version and the current nomination. FEATURE IT!!!! Weasel Weasel 3689Sucrose b Colombia icon 18:30, 03 March 2007 (UTC)


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