Uncyclopedia:Uncyclopedian of the Month

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To credit those who spend so much time cleaning up Uncyclopedia and generally making it tidy, the Uncyclopedian of the Month was created.


Uncyclopedian of the Month badge

Precedence and privileges

Winners of the Award are elevated to Knight or Dame Commander of the Order of Uncyclopedia (and are thus referred to as Sir or Dame) and are allowed to wear the Uncyclopedia Cub Scout Proficiency Badge on the left arm of their Cub Scout jumper along with their other proficiency badges.


  • Voting is on a monthly basis.
  • In the past, a maximum of three UotM awards have been given out in a single month. Currently, only one user each month may win the award.
  • Please vote for the candidate you feel is most deserving of the award. Votes from sockpuppets, anonymous IPs, and unknown/inactive users are weighted appropriately.
  • When a user is nominated, the nomination template {{VoteUOTM}} can be added to their userpage.
  • You must get a minimum score of +5 to pass muster. Crowdsource, call in sexual favors, whore to your heart's content in order to get this number. Just don't make socks or vote twice. Or whore. Sorry I said that the first time.

Past Winners

EvilZakCarlbIMBJRMarcos MaloSplakaMadMaxRangeleyTodd LyonsRcmurphyCodeineAlgorithmGwaxMhailleTompkinsIsra1337Zombiebaron (2) • KeiteiMoneySignFamineFlammableOrion BlastarHindleyiteHinoaBradaphraserBraydieTom mayfairOne-eyed JackModusoperandiSpangOliproCeridwynInsineratehymnStrange but untrueThekillerfroggyCs1987Dr. SkullthumperRabbiTechnoMordilloMrN9000Under userHeerenveenTheLedBalloonRAHBRoman Dog BirdGerrycheeversSycamoreCajekCharitwoMnbvcxzSannseSysRqDexter111344Sockpuppet of an unregistered userMultiliteralistOptimuschrisTHEDUDEMANHyperboleChiefjusticeDSAndorin KatoNecropaxxWhy do I need to provide this?The WoodburninatorPuppyOnTheRadioGuildensternensteinElectrified mocha chinchillaEthineHELPMESimsilikesimsCount of Monkey CriscoAleisterSPIKELyrithyaRomartusColin "All your base" HeaneyBlack flamingo11Ptok-BentonicznyMatt lobsterSonjeTheHumbuckerFrosty (2) • LollipopShabidooMagic manMattsnowBizzeebeeverXamralcoPentium5dot1Villahj IdeeutOliphaunteFunnybonyAlpha QuintessonMr-ex777Saberwolf116SnippyTheHappySpacemanKip the Dip

See Past Winners for Full Details

Official Nominations for February


Foolitzer Nominated for the Foolitzer Prize
This user has been nominated for the Foolitzer Prize—you can vote for them or nominate your favourite users at Uncyclopedia:Foolitzer Prize.
Spiked baseball bat

This is the notorious "Spike ban stick."

en-N This user is a native speaker of English.
es-2 This user is able to contribute with an intermediate level of Español.
Sophia fire2 Civil War Veteran
This user stayed and defended the Mother Ship of Comedy during the 2013 secession.

“My object in living is to cross my vocation and avocation as my two eyes cross when I see a woman with awesome chest monkeys.”
~ Robert Frost (1936) on writing for no pay
“Three things from which we all benefit but which we ought not watch being made, are sausages, laws, and Special:RecentChanges.”
~ John Godfrey Saxe

Admin Spike since 3-Feb-13
(was SPIKE from 3-Oct-09 to 17-Jun-15)
(was SpikeFromNH from 30-Jul-09)
(edited anonymously from 2-Jul-09)

81,257 edits, 74 wins, 143 saves
Signature: Spıke Radiomicrophone
Location: New Hampshire Icons-flag-us (UTC-5, UTC-4 in summer)

Spike seasoning

Writer of the Year 2014 (tie)
Uncyclopedian of the Year 2013 (tie)
Writer of the Month December 2010 and November 2012
Uncyclopedian of the Month October 2010
Also, Gobshite of the Month April 2015

Heraldic rank:
OUN Order of Uncyclopedia since 3-Feb-13
GUN K.C. Grand Cross since 1-Jan-11
KUN Knight Commander since 3-Apr-10
CUN Commander since 1-Mar-10
Officer rank:
UC-Army-OF6 Brig. General since 27-Oct-15
UC-Army-OF3 Major since 3-Feb-13
UC-Army-OF1a Lieutenant since 11-May-10
UC-Army-OF1c SSgt since 6-Mar-10
Super powers:
Bureaucrat since 27-Oct-15
Sysop since 3-Feb-13
Autopatrolled since its inception
Rename/rollback since 25-Oct-10

Major works

Solicited editing

I've performed gut-and-paste jobs requested by a tag in the article, on:

  1. 1.0 1.1 1.2 Solicited at UN:REQ.
  2. The solicitation was made by an anonymous user.
  3. Solicited by numerous red-links placed in articles concerning the 2016 campaign, mostly by me
  4. Solicited at UN:VITAL.
  5. The solicitation was made by an {{ICU}} tag, and I put it there.
  6. The solicitation was made by one of Uncyclopedia's perennial problem children, and while he was banned from the site.

Unsolicited editing

Saves off VFD

I loiter at the Votes For Deletion (VFD) water-cooler, where bad articles go to die, looking for articles to save. It's more social than picking requests off a list, and it carries the satisfaction that every good job displaces one of Uncyclopedia's worst. It's like being the local Simon Cowell (though I'm probably also the object of one unsatisfied customer's reference to "Uncyclopedia's Hitler Youth"). I've thus taken custody of the following articles:

  1. I deleted the nomination for deletion, as the nominator was a sockpuppet of a banned user.
Free Dildos for Inmates?

And I provided clerical help, but disclaim responsibility, for several articles that were rescued from VFD when I instigated but didn't exactly volunteer. I would take myself out of the article history, if I could; and am doing the reader a huge favor at great possible personal risk by making links out of the following:

A save off VFH

Amid repairing Uncyclopedia's worst articles, I once exercised the presumption of repairing an article claimed to be Uncyclopedia's best. This strategy proved to be the fast track for featuring.

Placement Is Treatment

So said The Fat Man in the novel The House of God. That is, a workable (I mean billable) alternative to delivering treatment is to hand off the patient to the right specialist. My involvement on VFD and elsewhere has induced other, more knowledgeable users to go for the Save on the following:

And sometimes, I am the one without a chair when the music ends:

UnNews and UnNews Audio

Microphone on stand

In February 2010, the pickings became slim on VFD of salvageable articles. I parlayed an interest in current events into submissions to UnNews, usually closely based on actual but already-mostly-absurd emissions of the AP wire. My work on UnNews is listed on a separate page, which you should visit if you have feedback or suggestions for new items.

My style

Cow Cutie Pie

I'm here because I enjoy using MediaWiki, enjoy writing precisely, and like to make people laugh. I tried for a long time to avoid the politics of the site, and generally don't vote on individual or article honors, except that I vote on Votes for deletion, by way of paying admission to that salvage yard; and I used to welcome being given the Goldstein Award month after month.

My sense of humor is one of the drier ones here--the best examples are the virtually jokeless There Isn't Any and Objectivity. I avoid goofy flights of fancy unless they have a double meaning or otherwise relate to reality. Most everything I write has the seeds of truth, but the stems and leaves are total crap, developed with the low standards of research appropriate to this site. I'll engage in flights of fancy when I can weave it back to the theme or turn it into a conundrum, as in Dianalysis. I dislike toilet humor, as I write to amuse and not offend--unless the droppings are buried in comedy, as when I called the simian Hindu god Hanuman the Patron Saint of throwing feces, or digress in a passage on eating Cap'n Crunch to mention also sucking off Tony the Tiger.

Greedo solo

I plan humor with seriousness and think the parts of this web site that direct the user, such as page titles and categories, should not crack wise. Some say I state opinions in a tone more fit for divine mandates. I write concisely in a style that resembles spoken American, overuse commas to indicate pauses in speech, and am happy to end sentences with prepositions.

Fun facts

Spike the Dog (08e)

The ballpark is the perfect place to meet like-minded companions.

  • Spike is not morbidly obese (though perhaps that's only knowable in retrospect) nor orally fixated, as these animations might suggest.
  • Spike often cooks at home, following his First Law of Home Economics: If the sauce is curry or Szechuan, nothing has to be fresh. Cultural realism is not a criterion either, resulting in works like Hamburger Tikka Masala.
  • Spike is a late adopter of technology. Every Windows system is a 2700-song jukebox spanning decades, one-eighth of the songs recut and recombined. Except for that and web surfing, everything would be DOS.
  • Spike brings a netbook to the baseball stadium and works on articles during the frequent lapses in live action. With a single keystroke, he can claim to be "checking out-of-town scores."

2011 sabbatical

I got banned for a week in April 2011. I was offered a nice short leash but instead rode out the week and felt nothing but liberation, the second of four UnNews Editors-in-Chief to burn out in short order. My next outlet was an online newspaper comment section. I became notorious enough to win multiple guest appearances on a radio program in a small city upstate. My Congressional delegation doesn't know my name but the greeters at their public meetings do. But the newspaper website was even less moderated against trolling, and in May 2012, it dabbled with pay-to-play and I returned to create new Uncyclopedia articles again. New UnNews Audio features followed, and joined the radio stints and announcing at college sporting events as a third form of public address lacking only any measurable public.

From zero to hero


I kept my distance from the trolls who used to run the place, but in January 2013, chanting anti-corporation slogans, they stampeded a large number of Uncyclopedians to a separate website owned and controlled by them, over issues ranging from the political tone-deafness of our web-host personnel to the unsurprising fact that any Creative Department always works with other departments filled with the non-creative. They expect a Sugar Daddy to subsidize the work that we all have been providing for free for years, or hope for financial viability despite being too swell to coexist with advertisers. They don't realize that pay-to-play is coming to a website near them.

Now I was suddenly the leading candidate for Admin, based mostly on the compelling fact that nearly everyone else had left (and my most ardent backers would do likewise a couple weeks after the vote). This also happened to me once in the statewide organization of a small political party. I have gone from walking on eggshells to being The Law during some early-morning stretches. I check Uncyclopedia frequently throughout the day — except if there is a ball game.===

Score: 1
  • If Frosty and Zombiebaron have two, then SPIKE should have two (as should Puppy). And well earned for both of them (Puppy gets a [[Ghosts never seem to play fair|spiritual nom) for this last six weeks work in the fields. Aleister 13:17 13-2-'13
Awards, Decorations and Honours
Awards2 Awards Order of Uncyclopedia · Awards, Decorations and Honours · Admin Rank · Ninjastars
Ranks &
Writer of the Month · Uncyclopedian of the Month · n00b of the moment
Potatochopper of the Month

Foolitzer Prize
Writer of the Year · Uncyclopedian of the Year · RadicalX of the Year
RYA · User Space Affiliations · Past Winners

Limelight VFH · VFP · Best of · Top Ten: 2005 · 2006 · 2007 · 2008 · 2009 · 2010 · 2011 · 2012 · 2013 · 2014 · Hall of Shame
Prix citron Useless Gobshite of the Month · Useless Gobshite of the Year · Sandwich of the Month · FFS
Events citron Poo Lit Suprise · Aristocrat's Turkey Day Ball · The Article Whisperer
Happy Monkey Competition · Other competitions
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