UnSignpost

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{{Shortcut|[[Unsignpost]]<br />[[UN:USP]]<br />[[USP]]}}
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{{UnSignpost:menu}}
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{{title|UnSignpost Main Page}}
<span style="font-family:trebuchet ms; font-size:200%; line-height:100%; font-weight:bold;">The Uncyclopedia UnSignpost</span>
 
   
<span style="font-family:trebuchet ms; font-size:90%; line-height:100%; font-weight:bold;">{{Uncyclopedia:UnSignpost/slogan}}</span>
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{{Shortcut|[[USP]]; [[Unsignpost]]}}
   
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<div align="center"><span style="font-family: cursive, sans-serif; font-size:500%; line-height:200%">The UnSignpost</span></div>
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Message to Uncyclopedian readers. For the past three months you have received nothing. These UnSignpost journalists said they would bring you a copy every Thursday. They have let you down. UnSignpost has changed management. This page's list of editors will change in a months time to present information on active editors and bots. If you are an editor and you are listed on this page and are still active contact me on my talk page (click on (talk) after my user name). A few of us got so fed up with the lack of reporting that we made a new UnSignpost for April. None of the bots have contacted to help us deliver this so we are delivering it manually. Hopefully you shall all receive one before the end of this week.
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<div align="center"><span style="font-family:trebuchet ms; font-size:110%; line-height:100%">{{Uncyclopedia:UnSignpost/slogan}}</span></div>
   
The contributors and people who helped with technical stuff in this month's UnSignpost and therefore the only active UnSignpost editors and helpers we know of are:
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[[User:ScottPat|ScottPat]], [[User:Dannyboy1209]], [[Spike|Spike]], [[Nobody]], [[User:Aleister in Chains|Its me Aleister]], [[User:PuppyOnTheRadio|PuppyOnTheRadio]].
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Welcome to Uncyclopedia's online news page, the UnSignpost! Find anything you want and don't want about what's happening on this site and elsewhere! News is updated here regularly <s>(every month)</s> giving you a minute by minute acount of the goings on in the Uncyclopedia community.
   
You have a month to comply until we re-write the list of editors (4th May 2013: May the <s>Force</s> Fourth be with you). Its for everyone's benefit.
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<div align="center">[[UnSignpost:Current|Current Edition]]</div>
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<span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">'''Occasional Editors:''' [[Nobody]] &bull; [[User:Dannyboy1209|Dannyboy1209]] &bull; [[User:ScottPat|ScottPat]] &bull; {{u|Gerrycheevers}} &bull; {{u|Under user}} &bull; {{u|Orian57}} &bull; {{u|THEDUDEMAN}} &bull; {{u|Sockpuppet of an unregistered user}} &bull; {{u|An Ape that Only Exists on Thursdays}} &bull; {{u|Guildensternenstein}} &bull; {{u|Bad Shroom}} &bull; {{u|The Woodburninator}} &bull; {{u|Electrified mocha chinchilla}} &bull; {{u|Heerenveen}} &bull; {{u|PuppyOnTheRadio}} &bull; {{u|CheddarBBQ}} &bull; {{u|ChiefjusticeDS}} &bull; {{u|Olipro}} &bull; {{u|Magic man}} &bull; {{u|Frosty}} &bull; {{u|Lollipop}} &bull; {{u|Mattsnow}} &bull; {{u|Xamralco}}</span>
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{{USP body-left}}
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{{USP article|Top Story|A Linear ''What''?|
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[[File:Zootsuitzeb.jpg|thumb|left|180px|Linear ''What''?]]
   
<span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">'''Glorious Founders & Co-Head Janitors:''' {{u|Dr. Skullthumper}} &bull; {{u|Cajek}}</span>
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Two of the relative technical giants in our ragtag bunch of survivors have been dabbling with Linear Gradients, a recent innovation that lets you create glitzy graphics without having to endure the warnings about gore and nudity at [[Special:Upload]].
   
<span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">'''Token [[Cabal]] representative:''' {{u|Mordillo}}</span>
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[[UnSignpost:Article/A Linear ''What''?|Read more...]]
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}}
   
<span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">'''The Paperbots:''' {{u|MrN9001}} &bull; {{u|THEDUDEBOT}} &bull; {{u|MantiBot}} &bull; {{u|Fnoodle}} &bull; {{u|Sockpuppet of an unregistered user}} &bull; {{u|Dexter111344}} &bull; {{u|ChiefjusticeDS}} &bull; {{u|MadMax}} &bull; {{u|Magic man}} &bull; {{u|Frosty}}</span>
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{{USP article|News Stories||
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[[File:Putin.jpg|left|50px]]
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'''[[UnSignpost:Article/Does Uncyclopedia need more admins?|Does Uncyclopedia need more admins?]]''' - Does Uncyclopedia need more admins? A question raised recently by an Aussie Canine at [[VFS]]. Some users love admins banning and deleting things and want more of it in the future.
   
'''[[UnSignpost/20130408]] is the new UnSignpost for April 2013. It is being sent out to everyone manually.'''
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[[UnSignpost/20130408|<span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">'''Click here to view the latest issue'''</span>]]
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[[File:cabaldesk.jpg|left|50px]]
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'''[[UnSignpost:Article/Urgent announcement: what is really happening|Urgent announcement: what is really happening]]''' - Corruption and lies riddle UnSignpost and here to put in place some corrections and truths is [[Nobody]] with his real take on this month's Uncyclopedic news.
   
<small>[[Uncyclopedia:UnSignpost/Archives|<span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">Click here to rifle through our archives</span>]]</small>
 
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[[Image:Lost.png|thumb|right|No, not that type of signpost. Just as useful, though.]]
 
   
<span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">The '''UnSignpost''' is the way to stay informed about Uncyclopedia without actually getting involved with all the madness that goes on around here on a regular basis. It seeks to provide some of the most useless information on Uncyclopedia's so-called "community".</span>
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[[Image:ChiefJusticeOnAGoodDay.jpg|50px|left]]
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'''[[UnSignpost:Article/Uncyclopedia's stripper returns|Uncyclopedia's stripper returns]]''' -
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The wallpaper has now been stripped and the wall is looking pretty bland, if not bare. The new wallpaper has been ordered but the heavy rain has delayed the delivery for a week or two. In the meantime the [[User:ChiefjusticeDS|Chief]]...
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<span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;"><big>'''If you sign up <big>[[/signup|HERE]]</big>'''</big>, one of our paperbots will deliver a fresh copy of the UnSignpost straight to your talkpage every week <s>for just $5.99 a month</s>. In case you haven't got enough spam already.</span>
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{{USP article|Image Gallery|Image of the week!|
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[[File:Collapse.gif|left]]
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<big>Visit our [[UnSignpost:Images|Image Gallery]]!</big>
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<span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;"><big>'''Interested in adding something to the signpost?'''</big> Drop us a line in [[/Press Room|the press room]] and we'll either ignore it, forget about it (most likely), or add it into our next issue. Want to write an article? Go right ahead and give us a draft in the press room. Any questions? Ask [[UN:AA|an admin]] (preferably {{u|ChiefjusticeDS}}).</span>
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{{USP article|Old|Archives and stuff|
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*[[UnSignpost:UnSignpost/20140328]]: Issue#199, carefully reporting everything that happened in the absence of the journalists
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*[[UnSignpost:UnSignpost/20140218]]: Special In-jokes Edition
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*[[UnSignpost:Article]]: Check out our old '''and''' new articles to find out why we are not the same!
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<span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;"><big>'''Want to chat with the editors live?'''</big> Good luck with that. You ''could'' drop in [irc://irc.freenode.net/#unsignpost ##unsignpost at irc.freenode.net] and talk with the editors of the UnSignpost about well... you know... stuff. You could also [[Uncyclopedia:UnSignpost/Editor's Toolkit|try flapping your ears and flying to Mars]], but don't hold your breath.</span>
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{{USP article|UnSignpost|UnSignpost Stuff|
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If you have a desire to write an UnSignpost article that may well feature in an UnSignpost edition or the front page then please [[UnSignpost:Article|click here]].
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<big>[[UnSignpost:Interview|Interviews with Uncyclopedians can be found here!]]</big>
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<div style="width:50%; float:left;"><div style="margin-right:2em; margin-left:1.5em;">
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{{USP article|[[Village Dump|Forums]]|Active Forums|
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#[[Forum:Article clean-up initiative]] - are you searching for a job?
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#[[Forum:Creation of rule-bound Marionettes]] - exactly
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#[[Forum:New sysops?]] - New sysops?
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#[[Forum:New user recruitment and retention]] - money is the key to everything
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{{USP article|Users|Chief returns!|
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[[User:ChiefjusticeDS|ChiefjusticeDS]] returns a few months after a declaration of eternal holiday. His paint has been stripped and he is now returning to the place he loves. UnSignpost and Uncyclopedia welcome him back with requests for wallpaper stripping in users' homes.
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{{Uncyclopedia:UnSignpost/Template:News|News about different services|
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*[[UN:PEE|Pee Review]] is currently struggling for its life. Stay informed about its situatuation with the UnSignpost!
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*The [[Proofreading service|Uncyclopedia Comma Brigade]] does not seem to be active but any new members, who would like to participate, are strongly encouraged to enlist themselves.
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*[[UN:AAN|The members of the Adopt-a-noob program]] are desperately trying to adopt someone. If [[you]] see them at your door, know that it was your choice.
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*[[VFP]] is now allowed to receive visits from friends and relations. Its state is stable and is improving.}}
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{{USP article|Competitions|[[VFH]]|
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Nominations [[Uncyclopedia:VFH/summary|needing a little push]] to reach the main page:
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*[[Accountant]] (5/0)
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*[[Python (programming language)]] (3.5/0)
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*[[Making Up Oscar Wilde Quotes]] (5.5/0)
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Highlight of the week:
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*[[Auguste Escoffier]] (5/0)
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|UnSignpost:20131021}}
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[[File:Lost.png|thumb|center|250px|No, not that type of signpost. Just as useful, though.]]
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'''Chief Editors''': [[User:Anton199|Anton]] and [[User:ScottPat|ScottPat]]
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(If you want to contribute to this page, either ask an UnSignpost Chief Editor or, if you are brave, do it without telling anyone.)
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<span style="font-family:trebuchet ms;">'''Retired Founders & Co-Head Janitors:''' {{u|Dr. Skullthumper}} &bull; {{u|Cajek}}</span>
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</div></div>
   
[[Category:It's news because I say it's news]]
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{{UnSignpost}}

Latest revision as of 18:05, April 16, 2014

Home

The UnSignpost
The Newspaper That Wonders What Happened To You. You Used To Be Cool.

Welcome to Uncyclopedia's online news page, the UnSignpost! Find anything you want and don't want about what's happening on this site and elsewhere! News is updated here regularly (every month) giving you a minute by minute acount of the goings on in the Uncyclopedia community.






Lost
No, not that type of signpost. Just as useful, though.

Chief Editors: Anton and ScottPat (If you want to contribute to this page, either ask an UnSignpost Chief Editor or, if you are brave, do it without telling anyone.) Retired Founders & Co-Head Janitors: Dr. SkullthumperCajek

The UnSignpost
DogNewspaper Articles List of all the articles · Press room
History Archives · UnSignpost's old format
For editors Help with the delivery · Help with Interviews
Biopics 2013 · 2014
Other pages Image Gallery · Subscribe! · Interviews themselves
Personal tools
projects