Uncyclopedia:Report a problem/archive5

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Revision as of 05:09, April 24, 2010 by Dexter111344 (talk | contribs)

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Trouble creating an account

I CANNOT CREATE AN ACCOUNT!!!!!!!!! THEY SAY, "WE CANNOT ALLOW YOU TOO OR SOMETHING!!!" PLEASE LET ME CREATE AN ACCOUNT!! The preceding unsigned comment was added by (talk • contribs)

Cannot register with my username!

I was trying to register in Uncyclopedia using my usual username (ArkBlitz in Inciclopedia) but it keeps claiming the username is invalid (even if it's not yet registered!) Any ideas? If so, please answer me in my discussion page. Thanks! -ArkBlitz 22:08, October 25, 2009 (UTC)

Random generator doesn't differ so much

For example, you put multiple same templates, both of which contain a random generator, like Canada Canada. These do render a different thing when you refresh, but not on the individual page session itself. --Sir General Minister G5 FIYC UPotM [Y] #21 F@H KUN 15:23, October 17, 2009 (UTC)

Use Template:R. --Algorithm 19:51, October 17, 2009 (UTC)

Momentary Site Disappearance

It only lasted about five minutes at 17:18 GMT +1, but the whole site just upped and left the intarweb without a by-your-leave. This might be a one off technical clitch at either end (mine or yours) but if it happens again or keeps happening (without it being traced to my end), you may have a server issue (bug) lurking in an unwanted corner that needs squishing, squashing and defenestrating...

Sircabhan Please don't goose-step too close to me 16:26, September 28, 2009 (UTC)

The hamsters must have ran out of caffeine again. ~Jewriken.GIF 16:30, September 28, 2009 (UTC)

Again, I have just had a dead bit where the site disappeared on me. No other sites were affected and nor was my WLM, so I do not think it is on my end. Lasted about ten minutes from 17:45 GMT +1.

SirCabhán ap Ailil Unseelie Knight, Ordo: Knights of the Silver Dragon & Les Amoureaux 17:00, September 29, 2009 (UTC)

Hamsters on a lunch break? But seriously, that happens every now and then. Has to do with the famous Wikia QOS. ~Jewriken.GIF 19:10, September 29, 2009 (UTC)
What QOS? SirCabhán ap Ailil Unseelie Knight, Ordo: Knights of the Silver Dragon & Les Amoureaux 05:53, September 30, 2009 (UTC)

I don't understand everything on here

I am not sure that everything on this site is entirely accurate. My grandad has some books that I will use to check for errors here, and if i find any I will either let you know, or correct them.



Get off your lazy asses and help with it. The preceding unsigned comment was added by Teh pwnerator (talk • contribs)

I'm Having a Battle with Another Uncyclopedia User

The Mark David Chapman page. Only two people have ever edited that page. One is me. The other is...another person. We keep changing the page back and forth and back and forth and back and forth the same way again and again. He's getting into my head. He's ruining me. I'm losing touch with my family. I'm getting to drinking again. Anyway, I don't know if this qualifies as a problem someone can help me with. I swear, if there was an Ask Amy advice column on this wiki, I would use it first, but I don't know what else to do. The preceding unsigned comment was added by Thatblondguy (talk • contribs)

Dude... Use the edit summaries and talk pages to communicate with people! Leave the user a message on their talk page, or perhaps the talk page of the article, then refer them to the talk page when you revert them. Come to a compromise... If after several attempts people refuse to discuss compromise then consult an admin for advice afterwards. Also, post new stuff at the bottom next time! Enjoy... MrN Icons-flag-gb HalIcon.png WhoreMrn.png Fork you! 00:27, Mar 11

I think I may have a drinking problem

So I thought the safest thing to do would be to report the problem before it gets worse. -- Brigadier General Sir Zombiebaron 00:46, 30 July 2009 (UTC)

Hmm... Well, the only way to deal with an addiction is to become addicted to something stronger. Have you considered methadone? MegaPleb Dexter111344 Complain here 00:52, 30 July 2009 (UTC)
Of course I've considered methadone, but I'd have to go to my doctor first for a script, wouldn't I? Unless you "know" where I can "buy" some, wink wink. -- Brigadier General Sir Zombiebaron 01:21, 30 July 2009 (UTC)

Yeah I got plenty to sell, I work at a clinic and I bring home one quart bottles of cherry flavor (red). Just call me. As soon as you're addicted to Methadone, we will have to use Suboxone to get you off that, which is more addictive and more expensive. That's how we operate. And don't ask for a dosage decrease, we need your money. I bloody hell just had to leave the David Icke show early cux there wasn't a pub that I could find tw'no-where. David, you shoulda effing told us where to get beer ! You host an all day event and expect alcoholics to be able to make it through when all you serve is coffee !!! The Orpheum Theatre needs to re-assess its operation. No food or alcohol available at all !!!!!!!!!!!!!! (Insert extra exclamation marks)

I lol'd, then I wut'd. --Hotadmin4u69 [TALK] 15:33 Mar 2 2010

Problem with image

File:Uncyclopeida.jpg appears on Special:Unusedfiles but is being used on Babel:96. Is there anyway to get it off the list besides linking it somewhere else? MadMax 13:02, 28 June 2009 (UTC)

Use {{Notorphan}} on the image description page to take it out of the unused images list. Spang talk 01:41, 29 Jun 2009

Thanks. MadMax 23:54, 30 June 2009 (UTC)

UnScripts:Main Page

An .html tag (</small>) is showing on UnScripts:Main Page under the New submissions section but I can't seem to fix it. Anyone want to take a look at this ? MadMax 20:46, 26 March 2009 (UTC)

I might assume that someone has as I cannot fine the (</small>) endtag at all. Sircabhan - I am a free Changeling - Hear me ROAR!!! 17:03, September 28, 2009 (UTC)

Options are missing

I believe other members have noticed and complained about the options on top of the edit box are not there (bold, italics, image upload, external links, etc.). I would like to know when they will come back. I hope they do. Please someone fix this. Just89 23:12, 15 January 2009 (UTC)

They're back! Unless you're using Internet Explorer or something. Sir SockySexy girls Mermaid with dolphin Tired Marilyn Monroe (talk) (stalk)Magnemite Icons-flag-be GUN SotM UotM PMotM UotY PotM WotM 12:45, 1 August 2009 (UTC)

Class not working

class="navbox collapsible {{#if:{{{expand|}}}||collapsed}}" It will not produce expand collaspe boxes. The preceding unsigned comment was added by (talk • contribs)

Penis on Screen

If you find that there is a large penis on your screen and it won't go away no matter how many times you press alt+f4 or use Ctrl+Alt+Delete, don't panic. This is normal. Most users experience this at some point during their usuage of uncyclopedia. In most cases it is not neccesary to notify Uncylopedia staff as most penises are just lost and will make their way off your screen within five minutes. If problem persists or if the penis exhibits one or more of the following conditions, please do notify Uncyclopedia staff: 1) is black, 2) is not white, 3) has two or more genital warts, 4) is curved, 5) has a tatoo of any sort, 6) has split ends on pubic hair, 7) has one testicle, 8) is uncircumcized, 9) is attached to female, 10) is flaccid, 11) there are two, 12) is bleeding, 13) lacks size, 14) has apple pie on it, 15) has pumpkin pie on it, 16) has any sort of dessert on it, 17) has a face, 18) has an erection lasting more than four hours, 19)is ejactulating, 20) is urinating, 21) is urinating on someone, 22) is photoshoped in any way

Thank you for your assistance in our effort to obtain racial purity by removing penises with inappropriate variations. The preceding unsigned comment was added by Analpenatration (talk • contribs)

Try going away from those porno sites. I know, it's really good to jack off to at first, but it's not so much fun when someone trys to screenfuck you. ~ Sir Paizuri / Talk / Contribs / Crap / 00:59, 23 March 2010 (UTC)

Possible Software Glitch

Whenever I roam around Uncyclopedia, and I am not logged in, I click an external link and it looks like this:


From: http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/Laziness

Note the following from the first link above:


Here is the same link again, only I have logged in:


See how different they are

Is this a software glitch?

(This does not happen on Wikipedia)

The Dark Archer was here 03:48, September 13, 2009 (UTC)

It's not a bug, it's a "feature". Seriously. --User:Jack Phoenix/sig 19:28, September 13, 2009 (UTC)

Sandbox is locked

I've noticed that the sandbox is locked from editing. What's happened? 22:31, November 3, 2009 (UTC)

The sandbox has been protected by an admin to prevent IP's editing it. If you wish to use the sandbox please log in or create an account. If you feel that it has been locked from IP editing unfairly contact an administrator. --ChiefjusticeDS 22:35, November 3, 2009 (UTC)

Problem: your site isn't funny

It's True we know..We all suck, not as much as our moms do though! I'm not really sure what else you can do about it. Love, 21:58, November 6, 2009 (UTC)

Cool. --Andorin Kato 22:01, November 6, 2009 (UTC)
Story bro. --Pleb SYNDROME CUN medicate (butt poop!!!!) 18:14, December 2, 2009 (UTC)
You are from ED. I'm glad you admit you suck. As I mentioned elsewhere... "So what you are saying is that because you have found one shit quote added by a retard and we choose not to lock our site from editing by IPs (like ED does) we sometimes get retarded edits from people like you? Well, yes. Unfortunately we do. Fortunately for us our good articles (which we have thousands) are far better than anything ED has mostly as the majority of ED articles are a pile of old wank." You might have missed that point. Tell you what... Why not allow IP edits on ED? Oh, you don't have anything like the userbase of editors to support that. MrN Icons-flag-gb HalIcon.png WhoreMrn.png Fork you! 06:38, Feb 26

I think my girlfriend is cheating on me

She's always still in bed when I come back home for lunch, doesn't allow me anywhere near her mobile and doesn't specify which friends she's going out with even when I ask politely. Any advice? --nldr 02:15, March 12, 2010 (UTC)

Ask her to shave down there - keeps getting caught in my teeth.                               Puppy's talk page00:40, June 5, 2009 Friday, 03:07, Mar 12 2010 UTC
She says my pubes are too good for her to waste. --nldr 11:57, March 13, 2010 (UTC)

Serious problem: unable to access BJAODN on your Unmeta site

I keep getting the following error message on your Unmeta site: UnMeta has a problem

Sorry! This site is experiencing technical difficulties. Try waiting a few minutes and reloading.

(Can't contact the database server: Host 'sophia' is blocked because of many connection errors; unblock with 'mysqladmin flush-hosts' (oscar))

What's going on? I'm trying to access BJAODN pages and find myself unable to do so because of this stupid sophia issue. Rickyrab 16:48, April 6, 2010 (UTC)

This problem is afflicting your entire meta.uncyclomedia.org site, including http://meta.uncyclomedia.org/wiki/UnSource:Wikipedia_BJAODN/I_get_my_bad_jokes_deleted_on_Route_66. Rickyrab 16:53, April 6, 2010 (UTC)
That is off the site. "Uncyclomedia" is a stalled out project to form a union between the various language uncyclopedias. You'll need to talk to the admins over there about it. On a related note, I do see issues with a "foreign"/long-since-forgotten-about site claiming to be coordinating the various uncyclopedias, but I digress. --Mn-z 18:31, April 6, 2010 (UTC)


you all are fucking retards. there is a limit for everything. dont cross it. at least in the case of religious sentiments and national pride.

The preceding unsigned comment was added by a religious nationalistic fuckstick (talk • contribs) 
I agree. This site has been taken over by far too many American Christians. They should all be anally probed with their crucifixes and use the American flag to wipe up the mess. On the plus side, at least they haven't stooped to using a word that relates to people with intellectual disabilities as an insult. After all, everyone has their own lines that shouldn't be crossed, and parody and satire should never cross those lines.                               Puppy's talk page00:40, June 5, 2009 Sunday, 14:07, Apr 18 2010 UTC
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