Uncyclopedia:Poo Lit Surprise

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Welcome to the 9nd Edition of our beloved and prestigious Poo Lit Surprise. Watch your step.
Consult the talk page or me for any questions or concerns. See the Poo Lit Archives for the results from past competitions.


The competition

What is the Poo Lit Surprise?

Poo Lit Surprise Logo

A writing competition held on Uncyclopedia for a small cash prize. It is designed to jump-start writing quality at Uncyclopedia. After the previous eight competitions, a significant number of featured articles for the following month(s) were from the PLS, and it could be argued that the overall quality of featured articles increased.

Who can enter and what are the rules?

All registered members of Uncyclopedia are encouraged to enter, though a few conditions and limitations apply. Judges are barred from entering the competition (see here for the list of judges). Non-noobs (people who've been here longer than 3 months) cannot enter the "Best Article By a Noob" category, and noobs are not restricted to the "Best Article By a Noob" category. A checkuser will be run to ensure that no supposed "noobs" are sockpuppets of existing users. Sockpuppet accounts will be disqualified and banned. Unless your sockpuppet is BENSON of course.

You may enter only once for each category (for which you are eligible; one article per category per person). An article may only be entered in one category, and it must fit within the requirements of a particular category. You may not change three words and the title of an article to make it eligible for another category; such behavior will result in both articles being disqualified. Additionally, in previous competitions, collaborations were permitted. However, due to a lack of collaboration submissions and complicating rules, collaborations are no longer permitted.

Articles created prior to the competition cannot be submitted. Also, no plagiarism. Should we discover your work is not original, you will be disqualified. Using resources such as the Reefer Desk, Image Request, or Pee Review is forbidden. Users may, however, use Vital, Uncyclopedia:The Creative Process, Category:Rewrite, Special:Wantedpages, Uncyclopedia:Requested Articles and/or Inspire an Article to help get ideas.

When is the PLS going to be held?

  • From May 10th ― May 23rd, entries will be accepted.
  • From May 24th ― June 6th, entries will be locked and judged.
  • From June 7th ― June 13th, winners will be announced, articles will be moved into the mainspace, and all entries will be unlocked.
  • June 14th ― we will all get on with our lives.

(n.b.: all times are to be measured by UTC, and all phases of the contest end at midnight on the specified day; entries may be accepted late only under extraordinary conditions)

Where should I put my entry?

The article should be placed on your namespace (i.e. the title should be in the format User:[username here]/[article name here]). Between May 10th ― May 23rd, you should post a link to your article in the entry section below and sign as you would a forum post or vote.

If you're a paranoid, or afflicted with OCD, or just want to tell people to shove off until after the PLS, add {{PLS-WIP}} to your entry.

Boxers or briefs?



Submit your entries below.

Best Main Namespace Article

Also simply known as "Best Article", this category is for articles which are not of an alternate namespace (i.e. UnBooks, HowTo, UnNews, Why?, UnPoetia, etc.).

Username Entry Comment
Sonic80 User:Sonic80/A Huge Fucking Gorilla with Downs Syndrome Its the end of the school year and I have finals, but I hope I will be able to finish this on time.
Ch00bakka J.E.R.K. created in March. Read the rules again. ~Jewriken.GIF 01:12, May 14, 2010 (UTC) Hail Dave!
Inebriated User:Inebriated/Jacques_Derrida_and_My_Balls Sonic80's finals inspired this tale of loss and tragedy, and in the midst thereof, hope.
Black_flamingo11 User:Black_flamingo11/salamander Sporked from your wildest dreams.
Cashmag12000 User:Cashmag12000/Cake_Killers - Your first edit was in February; you're too old for the noob category.--Sir HELPME Talk (more? --> CUN ROTM NOTM Pleb USS Pees SK ) On Friday, 03:09, May 21 2010 UTC All of them are heretics.

Best Noob Article

A category for noobs (users who have been on Uncyclopedia for three months or less). May be of an alternate namespace.

Username Entry Comment
John Lydon User:John Lydon/squidbillies My rewrite of the Squidbillies page. Lots of work into this one.
Eddiethehead616 Sniper wolf -- Sorry, but created before the competition / in main space / may have been edited by others. WHY???PuppyOnTheRadio 05:15, May 14, 2010 (UTC) IRON MAIDEN!!! UP THE IRONS! SNIPER WOLF IS HOT!!!
FaygoMayhem "Jingle Belled to Death" http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/User:FaygoMayhem I really, really hate Christmas music...
Veita http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/User:Veita/Justin_Bieber R'n'B - because homosexuality simply isn't gay enough
DPRS "Murder on a Train Plane" http://uncyclopedia.wikia.com/wiki/User:DPRS/UnBooks:Murder_on_a_Plane Tickets please, bitches!
PuppyOnTheRadio User:PuppyOnTheRadio/Welcome This qualifies, doesn't it?

Best Illustrated Article

Based on how well an article's images contribute to the humor of the article. May be of an alternate namespace (images and article must be created by the user).

Username Entry Comment
It's Mrthejazz... a case not yet solved. 14:20, May 16, 2010 (UTC) User:Mrthejazz/A picture of Jordan with boobs that links to a picture of jordan without boobs. Also, there's guy in a rocking chair. Alright,hyperbole, it's time for some one-upmanship!
Hyperbole User:Hyperbole/A picture of Jordan without boobs, and then there are raccoons Ohh, so you think you can stop my flow, Mrthejazz? You can't stop my flow!!

Best Alternate Namespace Article

The category which is strictly for alternate namespace articles (i.e. UnBooks, HowTo, UnNews, Why?, UnPoetia, UnScripts, etc.).

Username Entry Comment
Guildensternenstein UnPoetia:Paradise Abridged My mini-epic in parody/homage to John Milton's. Hopefully I'll finish in time.
It's Mrthejazz... a case not yet solved. 05:31, May 11, 2010 (UTC) User:Mrthejazz/Howto: Staple toast to a wall Hello!
User:Padimir Padoffski User:Padimir_Padoffski/HowTo:Succeed_in_American_politics Done. and with only 2 george bush jokes
Ch00bakka UnScripts:Everyone Loves Rasputin (Episode One)-- Sorry, but created before the competition / in main space / may have been edited by others. WHY???PuppyOnTheRadio 05:43, May 14, 2010 (UTC) In Soviet Russia, article submits you!
RAHB User:RAHB/UnTunes:We're Having An Orgy Everyone is welcome!
Skinfan13 user:Skinfan13/UnNews:Greenland Declares Independence from Denmark, World Doesn't Care Just made this on a whim, figured I might as well enter it.
withoutalltoes User:Withoutalltoes/HowTo:Shit Yourself I don't really advocate public defecation :)
P.M., WotM, & GUN, Sir Led Balloon Baloon(Tick Tock) (Contribs) 18:50, May 19 UnNews:US Congress tired of calling corporations up for lectures one at a time; summons entire American economy for a group hearing Suck my presidential cock, bitch!

Best Rewrite

For articles which are rewrites of existing articles.

Username Entry Comment
Skinfan13 User:Skinfan13/PLS My soon to be epic rewrite of Captain Morgan.
Hyperbole User:Hyperbole/Sparta Because Sparta is not a fucking movie.
Black_flamingo11 User:Black_flamingo11/vending machine This isn't a movie either.
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