Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/silver

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edit silver

It sucks and I can't be arsed to make it not suck. Could you be a dear and tell me how to make it not suck for me so that I can expend as little effort as possible? Assuming I ever even get around to it, that is... 1234 ~ 16px-Pointy Major Pleb Sir Lyrithya AthyriaIsarraHaydrahlienne - 'Destroyer of the Wiki' - MUN OUN CUN KUN DUN GUN *shifty eyes* (zombiebaron) • (dr. skullthumper) • (roman dog bird) • (nachlader) • (frosty) • (more zombiebaron) • (talk) • (stalk) • (block) • (log) • (list) • WotMUotMRotMPotMUGotM x4 • SotMFFSNOMMotMBFF x2 • GSA x2 • PSFiyCMDTop3 x3 • Top10VFH x15 • VFP x3.5 • HoSTAWHMCPEEINGPRSPCURCΥΣΣICZB -- 23:16, 7 January, 2011 (UTC)

Humour: 5 Topic seems a little tough to turn humorous, but at the same time, there were some good parts I saw. From the Quicksilver Scandal down, it got kind of funny. Became sort of a head-spinner from the liquidifying to silver, etc. part. The 'discovery of silver' was pleasantly humorous, especially about being blinded and finding bodies in the ditch. The crowbar bit at the end was funny, but you need to expand on that. Perhaps talk about an accident that happened with the crowbar or the discovery of a new element called crowsilver, or something. Like I said before, its seems hard to make silver a humorous topic, especially in the beginning. I feel like if someone just sat down and stared at the beginning section, the humor would just pop out, like a monkey banging out the complete works of Shakespeare or something like that. I'm sorry I can't clarify, the silver font hurts my eyes a bit...
Concept: 7 Concept is fine, get the idea of silver, silver, and more silver. Not much to say here.
Prose and formatting: 6 Good Prose and formatting. However, some of the sentences are running together and It feels a little crammed at some points, but your feelings and emotions on this may differ from mine.
Images: 4 Image-wise, I think you could perhaps use an extra image, perhaps of the Abyssinian's being blinded? or something, it's up to you. Now then, in regards to the present pictures. I feel that the first picture needs to be changed. It may just be me, but this particular picture seems pointless. Perhaps silver bars would serve a better purpose of presenting silver? The second picture seems good, I found it relatively humorous. The third picture is like the first one to me, a little pointless. I understand the idea you're going for, but...it isn't placed right and it's not the best picture for it.
Miscellaneous: 6 I have respect for anyone who dares to traverse the writings of colors for articles, purely because that stuff is a pain to make funny. All in all, made a good attempt, but falls short of a frontline article. I think maybe an additional section, perhaps like 'silver in the modern world' and use that as an opportunity to make jokes. Maybe talk about the movie I, Robot and how its the silver of the robots that makes them deadly, or something.
Final Score: 28 My general feeling about this article is mixed. On one hand, its a tough topic, on a another, you do make some good advances towards making it funny. I really feel that this is a kind of article you just have to sit down with and stare until you get something good at the end of the day, and maybe with some help from someone else. Look towards adding a section and putting a punchline or joke in the beginning, otherwise the reader will lose interest fast like how I kind of did. I hope my critique helps you out in some way and that this article eventually gets an award or some form of recognition. And sorry if it doesn't do any of that for you. Good luck
Reviewer: --Sir Oliphaunte (განხილვა)  Georgia-flag-on-soccer-ball-vector 05:20, January 10, 2011 (UTC)
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