Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/jury

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edit jury

silicson 10:34, 16 January 2009 (UTC)

I'll take a look. --Tagstit 17:04, 16 January 2009 (UTC)

Humour: 4 I was very confused here. The entire part of your last article was taken from a website. If that is true, then this is very unoriginaly and therefore loses alot of points for humour. I am new here though and if that is something people commonly do here I am sorry for taking off points for that, but this is the first time I have seen this in Pee Review. Another thing is that this was VERY random. It tried to hard for jokes and didn't have many funny parts. There isn't much more I can say about this though. Many points could be recovered if you were the original writer and it wasn't so random, but more directed to a theme so to speak. Another thing is that things like "ver-dick" isn't very funny, it just seems childish.
Concept: 5 I guess a courtroom argument about possible punishments has the POTENTIAL to be funny, but you barely reach any here. Bulk your article up a bit. Not every line HAS to be funny, and in fact, making some serious parts in turn, makes your article funnier. Again, your article needs to be directed to a theme though and it has a weak one, which is just a jury thinking it can choose a horrible sentence. Improve that more.
Prose and formatting: 2 This was a nightmare as far as prose wise, and completely destroyed any potentially funny things. I will be brief and just name a few things that you should consider looking at. First, the pictures bunch up at the top so it messes it up. Second, the words after the very large picture in the middle create a large ugly whitespace because of the distance. You need more of an introduction than a quote. Finally, this could use a MAJOR spell check, because many words don't have spaces between them and spaces are very inconsistent.
Images: 4 The pictures aren't bad, but what they do to the article is. The pictures aren't laugh out loud, but they do help move the article along. Consider moving them and changing their size to improve the look of your article and as mentioned in format, don't bunch them up at the top, or anywhere for that matter. Space them out!
Miscellaneous: 5 Averaged, plus a point because your still new. ;)
Final Score: 20 Ya, this article is destroyed, you can still do a few things to save it. First, you NEED to make it look better. Second you need to get rid of that part from the other site. Finally, build your article up! Thats it. Good Luck!
Reviewer: --Tagstit 17:27, 16 January 2009 (UTC)
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