Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/User:WarWalrus/What to do when gypsies steal your carrots

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edit User:WarWalrus/What to do when gypsies steal your carrots

Don't be confused if you see who originally made this. I've just changed my account.--WarWalrus (talk) 23:50, April 2, 2012 (UTC)

WarWalrus (talk) 23:50, April 2, 2012 (UTC)

I like it. Expect in 24 hours or my name isn't Olipro. I mean Oliphaunte. --OliOmniOmbudsman Dumbo 22:52, April 28, 2012 (UTC)
Well as Oliphaunte has failed to post his review within the 24 hour time frame he allotted for himself, I hear-by claim this review for myself. -Grammarnazilogo Fe+3 AlFe+2 01:58, May 1, 2012 (UTC)
Humour: 8 I did enjoy the read. Here's my point by point dissection of it.
  • Intro-Concise and to the point.
  • Body
  • Step 1-Realistic with some nonsense thrown in. I might consider swapping out "although many people just kill themselves" with something less extreme and leaning more toward non sensible.
  • Step 2-Realistic (again). I'd swap out "mortally injured" with something more non sensible ([again] again)
  • Step 3-You can add a few more people to your raiding party before it turns into listcruft. I'm not a fan of the "Sandwich holder"- just too random.
  • Step 4-I'm not entirely certain how dark gypsy magic makes it "complete pillock" to wear jeans= seems a bit dumb. Also I'm unsure how the nurse costume would be waterproof. I am going to have to try the top hat thing with one of my friends though...
  • Step 5- Putting the gypsy in the house threat doesn't have an obvious meaning so it sounds a bit dumb- I figured out what you meant but a clarification might be in order. I don't see the need for the random sandwich breaks either... in this article I mean- anytime is a good time for a sandwich break!
  • Conclusion-Concise and sets up the possibility for a sequel- I like it.
Concept: 10 Thank you for finally giving me a step by step for this! Believe it or not this has happened to me before... twice.

If you haven't already thought of it, then I'll be the one to say that this should end up under the HowTo namespace.

Prose and formatting: 6.78 I noticed numerous spelling and grammatical issues throughout (including multiple spellings of "gypsy")... I might correct them but I reserve the right to be a dick and just point them out to you and then proceed to bug you to fix them :D
Images: 8.5 The images could be more creative but for the purposes of this article they work just fine.
Miscellaneous: 8.3 I just averaged your scores... Whoopity-do-da!
Final Score: 41.58 This is a fine article you have written here. I look forward to when it hits mainspace. Thanks again ([{again} again] again) for a good read.
Reviewer: -Grammarnazilogo Fe+3 AlFe+2 03:20, May 1, 2012 (UTC)

Thanks --WarWalrus (talk) 15:00, May 1, 2012 (UTC)

My apologizes Mr. WarWalrus, I have been slacking lately with reviews. It's a trend that I am trying to fight, I'm sorry I failed again with yours. --OliOmniOmbudsman Dumbo 00:42, May 2, 2012 (UTC)
No Worries Oliphaunte. I'm sure our paths will cross again. --WarWalrus (talk) 17:48, May 2, 2012 (UTC)

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