Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/UnBooks: USA ROCKS!

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edit UnBooks: USA ROCKS!

No gimmick. Just a short story I wrote. Tinymooose.gif » Sir Savethemooses Grand Commanding Officer ... holla atcha boy» 17:23, 7 April 2008 (UTC)

Humour: 9.7 This is almost, almost perfect humour (oh, wait, it's American themed, humor then) in my opinion. Th eonly reason I'm not actually giving this a ten is because I feel nothing is ever a ten on a wiki. The first couple of paragrpahs set up the rest of the article extremely well, and also including such lines as "unless I planned on getting a job (which I didn't)" which are just pure greatness. The story moves on very well, and is, may I say, gripping. I especially liked the line "because Sutton was an opportunistic businessman who literally would rip your heart out at the slightest misstep", because it's the kind of thing that isn't out of place with some of the shopkeepers I know. The problem that the story introduces, while slightly guessable, is no less humourous because of it, and it builds into a great climax when going back to the shopkeepers. If anything, it lands on something of a cliffhanger (sequel?). If I'm perfectly honest, this is a lot better than most proper books today.
Concept: 7 This, while not the best concept ever (a book about someone who lost the chance to make a whole lot of filthy lucre) is still rather good. UnBooks in painfully underdeveloped here, and something like this could be the perfect tonic for that. Of course, in a good writer's hands, even just a good concept can be twisted to the point of pure brilliance. Which is exactly what's happened here. If I'm perfectly honest, I don't really see how you can improve this. At all. (Except for a featured template, obviously).
Prose and formatting: 10 Absolutely perfect here, even moreso than in the humour section. Absolutely perfect spelling and grammar, nothing wrong with the formatting whatsoever (and with a nice use of different styles of formatting, to boot), images in the right place, yadda yadda yadda. You're experienced enough to not need this section anyway, as someone with a bazillion features generally knows what they're doing around here.
Images: 8 Nothing wrong here, as expected by the rest of the scores. The images themselves, while not brilliantly funny (not that they need to be with this class of writing), tie in with the actual article superbly. The images are madeby the captions here - they are like little intermissions of the articles that are just as good as the main act. Just like everything else, nothing I would change here.
Miscellaneous: 8.7 n/a
Final Score: 43.4 This is bloody brilliant. Absolutely brilliant. The best UnBook I have read on the site (not that that's that good a thing) by far, and just a great article. I couldn't do better if you gave me six months to be honest.
Reviewer: –—Hv (talk) 8/04 19:55
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