Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/The Color Problem

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edit The Color Problem

Any and all comments gratefully received by this rather pointless n00b... Its rather British centric in some of it's "jokes" so would appreciate any comments about that, also if anyone cares to help with the formatting and spelings I would be grateful. MrN Icons-flag-gb HalIcon.png WhoreMrn.png Fork you! 20:55, 21 November 2007 (UTC)

Humour: 9 It's brilliant. The first paragraph felt a little rushed and didn't seem to connect to the rest of the article as a whole, but for the most part it weaved together brilliantly, even through the eyes of a filthy American like myself. I especially liked 'keep colors seperate', 'red shift', and 'let's call the whole thing off'.
Concept: 10 It's great. An original concept with peckable execution.
Prose and formatting: 5 In some areas the sentence structure and grammar is lacking, and the article gets a little jumbled after the thing about Micheal Jackson. Some of the pictures are at fault for this. Maybe go through it reading aloud to see if there's anything you can smooth out a bit.
Images: 6 Some of them just seemed thrown in there, but some were used extremely effectively. I liked the captions on the 'Red shift' and 'Potato-Tomato' images, but I don't feel that the images 'Smashspeckys' and 'American1' added to it. It's completely up to you, however. I'm sure the article will do just fine without the revisions I've suggested, if you don't want to work on it anymore.
Miscellaneous: 7 Overuse of the passive voice makes me sad. However, jokes make me happy! Great, now look what you've done.
Final Score: 37 I'm new to Uncyclopedia, not an expert, so this is just a newbie's oppinion. But if you ask me, It'll be perfect if you just fiddle with the sentence fluency.
Reviewer: --Komodo Gallant
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