Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/Six Hats
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Pup 23:24, 28 June 2009 (UTC)
- I'm reviewing. Okay.
- It should be done by tommorow.
- Okay - first thing is to obviously drop the length... Pup
- It should be done by tommorow.
|Humour:||8.4321||Intro - The reference (no.2) was good. But maybe you would like to describe who this "Michael Hewitt-Gleeson" and "Eric Brienstock" are. Makes it clearer. Alternatively, you can make it funny by saying something like the Michael guy is a plastic surgeon. I know, it's random, but you get it?
References - Most of them were okay, made sense, those "not-meant-to-be-funny-but-okay-anyway" type of references. Some of them were funny, like "Don't try and argue with me! Really! I know how to use big words like onomatopoeia, so "Woof!"" though I know what onomatopoeia is. You just used it. Anyway, just shorten some of those reference thingies. It's wayyy too long. And looks wayy too weird, and some are Ooh! A butterfly! way to irrelevant.
Parallel thinking - Is the "An individual thinking alone will come to an argeement A group thinking together will come to an argument." part a quote? Because if it is, you should say something like "As what Dr. Bono said, "An individual thinking alone blah blah blah."" it makes the format look nicer. I know this is in the wrong section, but whatever.
Stragetgies thing - Yah, good. Food is important for hats to work properly. I liked this section. The "Example programs" is good as well, having a perfect balance of hats. But you forgot Indigo for the "colors to paint the rainbow". And grey. And erm, turquoise.
Types of hat - Great lists. Especially the Blue hat classroom lists. Wonderful. Humorous. Well, has the potential, at least.
Application Method - The copyright infringement is well, good. But maybe you can "accidentally reveal it". Something like "Nope, I won't tell you that it requires Cheese Fries mixed with Cheddar BBQ doritos for it to happen." Something like that.
|Concept:||7.49876543||Yes, good potential. Maybe you can keep including references to the grey hat. Not literal |
|Prose and formatting:||6.1626364656||Generally - Too many references. Maybe a few references like those on SysRq's talkpage are fine, but a mass overflow of references and useless ones like "Seven!" and "Six! No, Seven!" are not required. Maybe you can cut off some of them.
Underlying Principles - The part "...as a result de Bono came..." should be "...as a result, de Bono came
Parallel thinking - Ah. But why is it not in caps? It should be "Parallel thinking" and not "parallel thinking". And the sentence "...teachings of de Bono they wouldn't be able..." should be changed to "...teachings of de Bono, they wouldn't be able..." with the comma.
Types of hat? - I think it's meant to be "Types of hats" not "Types of hat". Right? Oh, and the references aer making the article look ugly.
|Images:||7.912345||Book Image - The book text is not clear. Maybe you can use a GIF pic. It looks so blurrrrry.
Andromeda Image - Why is it located like, just below the "white hat" section? If you have made a mistake, just correct it. But if it's meant to be something like that, align it properly. Maybe you should use
Blue hat pic - Good, Napoleon willl be delighted.
Others - Yah, fine. Meant for the article, a moderate amount of humor and well, facts.
|Final Score:||37.5058468956||Good article. My preview says 37.something, so it's a pretty good article. one of my highest scores.|