Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/Selective Inbreeding

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edit Selective Inbreeding

The biggest of my three PLS entries. I'm interested in taking this one to VFH along with Evelyn, so review quickly and comprehensively if possible. --Littleboyonly TKFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK Oldmanonly 01:42, 12 February 2008 (UTC)

Humour: 7 There are some really good nuggets in there, especially the three S's, but it does seem to tail off a bit in funnyness at the end, which seems more random than the excellent first half of the article.
Concept: 9 I really like science-type puns. Don't know why. This is an extremely good concept.
Prose and formatting: 10 I wish every Uncyc article was this well formatted, there'd be much less work.
Images: 8 Easilly identifiable, funny images. The second one in particular just sums up the article: simple but effective. The Simpsons edge gives less knowlegeable readers an insight into the subject matter while still giving them a few laughs.
Miscellaneous: 8.5 n/a
Final Score: 42.5 The ending of this just needs to be worked up a bit (I would personally move the Creationism section up a bit, it seems out of place, but meh), and this should be good-to-go.
Reviewer: –—Hv (talk) 28/02 22:29

THANK YOU! I'm terribly sorry for the ending, I was in a terrible rush to finish because I wanted to have time left for other PLS entries. I suppose I could block people now or something. --Littleboyonly TKFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK Oldmanonly 22:32, 28 February 2008 (UTC)

Since you asked for a better explanation about the ending: It just seems like it goes off onto another subject (Creationists) at random, and it leaves the reader thinking "How did we get here". It's a good idea, it just needs doing a bit more subtly. It's still better than most, though. –—Hv (talk) 29/02 15:37
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