Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/Reading, Berkshire

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FAQ

edit Reading, Berkshire

Frog 13:50, 23 July 2008 (UTC)

I'll review this, fo now, enjoy Noel.--Sycamore (Talk) 11:02, 1 August 2008 (UTC)
Fielding
A Free Coupon
For a bumming session with Noel Fielding
Humour: 5 Thought there nothing that really jumps forward as being exceptionally funny, it may be the case that it fairly closed to anyone outside of the south east.

The whole things a little messy, combined with this there nothing a too out of the ordinary here, in fact it looks like a huge chunk has been sporked form wikipedia. Because most of the sections are all very similar with little or no break in tone or style the article does not read so well, and to be honest is not all that funny for anyone outside of Reading. A good example of a regional article is Glasgow - you've got the whole Sean Bean thing/Mordor thing which opens an essentially closed topic out. There’s nothing here which does that. I did not find many of the Gags like the "three B's" or Fermented cat piss all that funny, these cold be funnier Its just that they lack enough context of individuals or history to give them any satirical context. For there to be more humour, perhaps a little more rounded ideas of historical context, more notable characters etc images which give an impression of the place, preferably in a negative light.

Concept: 5.5 Very local, this topic is destined to be a bit isolated. I think that if you brought in some more pertinent reference to the outside world instead of lame gags about Busta Rimes there could be a lot more possibility. I can't in any kind of honesty say this is a great concept, however you've handled it the least appealing of ways: local centric gags that allude so little to an outsider. You can be local centric in some ways, but the humour has to convey a little better and in fact should be quite focused on the place, not just things that go on there, but the look, tone and overall atmosphere would need to be conveyed a lot better for this article to work.
Prose and formatting: 6 Red links, not enough blue ones[1]. the sections are a little too wikipedia, perhaps a retelling of local folklore in Cquotes or something would liven the whole thing up:
Cquote1 Never ye come to Reading or else ye be bound to a foul home and life Cquote2

—Bishop Bimboo, Pastor of Reading, Berkshire

There’s also a fair amount of poor grammar, for example the CARLSBERG bit seems a little too silly, Similarly though its a little on the ransom side, a consistent parody of the topic should be the goal - not random reference to just anything. Similarly it’s important to have some wacky humour - it’s a question of a having a balanced Focused article

  1. and references Just like this
Images: 4 Only the one, formatted badly, up load a JPEG file and align right to around 250px. When seeking new ones would focus on having some development though them, perhaps historically to today for Parody effect, just a random one of the place without humorous captions will add little to the article.
Miscellaneous: 5 Not too great, bit it's got potential if you have a bit of a rethink and tidy it all up, get some more images etc.
Final Score: 25.5 I hope I've been helpful, should you need anything else, just leave a not on my talk page:)
Reviewer: --Sycamore (Talk) 12:20, 2 August 2008 (UTC)

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