Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/OG Loc

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edit OG Loc

I made this article about a character in Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas; needs some help, though... 124.83.16.150 12:24, 27 November 2007 (UTC)

I got it. --Sir Under User (Hi, How Are You?) VFH KUN 17:06, 2 December 2007 (UTC)

Humour: 2 Right, there isn't much. Sorry to be so blunt, but there you go.
Concept: 3 Here's a tip - although we have quite a few game-related articles on here, we don't like 'em much. They tend to get called "Gamecruft", and do badly on VFD. Game articles hence start at a disadvantage.
Prose and formatting: 4 Well, there's not too much of it, for a start, and what's there has a few red links, and plenty of quotes, and a list. None of those things go down too well around here either. However, on the positive side, it's formatted well enough, and there are no problems with the spelling.
Images: 3 Well, there aren't any. So that's an average of the other scores as per the rules.
Miscellaneous: 3 And that's another average of the other scores.
Final Score: 15 See comments below.
Reviewer: --Sir Under User (Hi, How Are You?) VFH KUN 17:46, 2 December 2007 (UTC)


OK, first up: don't get discouraged by the score. You knew it needed work, that's why someone stuck an ICU tag on it. and ICU articles are ones that attract marks like this. Here's a little advice to help:

  1. Read HTBFANJS. We go on about it a lot, but it is helpful, and it really can give good pointers to how to improve an article. Some of the best writers on here read it every time they start a new article.
  2. Next: lose some of the quotes, and the list. Too many quotes suggest you haven't actually got much to say, and lists are real warning signs on here. You need to have more content, and if you do have a list, it has to have a point.
  3. I also recommend looking through Uncyclopedia:Best_of at some of the articles. Look for game related ones - there aren't many, but the ones on there should show you how to do it, or give you some ideas. Look at other articles as well, particularly the biographical ones, they might give you some thoughts about how to structure things, and how to add content.
  4. Concept is key. Always try to have a good concept before you write an article. Don't just pick a subject and start writing, hoping funny will happen, you have to plan a bit, have an idea where you're heading, maybe a punchline to build up to, or a running gag that underpins the article. Maybe you can use it as a sideswipe at the tired and clichéd stereotype characters you find in games, or you could satirise rap culture through the conventions of gaming? Basically, don't just think person + kitten huffing reference + a couple of made-up facts = funny.

That's some general advice to get you started. If you get a good idea for it, and get started, but need help making it work or expanding it enough, give me a shout on my talk page and I'll see what I can do.

Finally, this is just my opinion, others are available, and good luck! -Sir Under User (Hi, How Are You?) VFH KUN 17:46, 2 December 2007 (UTC)

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