Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/Nutella (2nd submit)

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia

Jump to: navigation, search


edit Nutella

The last one was complete crap, and was in no way helpful. I have not edited it. I need an honest in-depth opinion. I can't beleive Jasper Ain't dead yet! I'm happy too, sire. DR2 ASA or Nutella? Decide. Talk to meh. 17:14, 27 July 2008 (UTC)

Humour: 3.2 It's entirely random, and has nothing whatsoever to do with Nutella. The gratuitous swearing does not automatically make something funny. The ADD thing has been done way too much, but it may have worked if you did it in a remotely funny way. This isn't Family Guy. Try to stay on topic just a little.
Concept: 6 I know how delicious Nutella is. We all do. But right now, you're making the actual subject look like an afterthought. You have to TELL ME why Nutella deserves its own article.
Prose and formatting: 7 Get rid of the redlinks and bolded warning at the beginning, and it'll be awesome.
Images: 2 The Spongebob fish pic adds nothing. Once you get rid of that, all you'll have is a jar of Nutella. Which is on-topic, but not funny.
Miscellaneous: 2 It's too short! You have to lengthen it. I'm gonna be straight with you, what you have now is a crappy, unfunny article, that, although mercifully short, has almost no potential. You'll have to do a total and complete rewrite. Gut it, rewrite it, and then come back to the Pee Review ... er, toilet...
Final Score: 20.2 It needs a LOT of work, kiddo. LOTTA work.
Reviewer: HNT♥♥ Look at this|Look at that |now it's time to sit & chat 21:54, 27 July 2008 (UTC)
Personal tools