Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/Never on Sunday

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia

Jump to: navigation, search

FAQ

edit Never on Sunday

If you take this please review it on a Monday, a Monday, a Monday, that would be very very good. Or review it on a Tuesday, a Tuesday, a Tuesday, in fact I wish you would. Or on a Wednesday, a Thursday, a Friday, or any other day this Fall. But Never on a Sunday, a Sunday, a Sunday, don't work on it at all. Aleister 19:00 15 11

I think I'll review this... on sunday.
Unless I do it sooner, anyhow. ~ Pointy *shifty eyes* (talk) • (stalk) -- 20101127 - 00:14 (UTC)
I think you'll love it, you'll love it, you'll love it, and quote it in your sleep. Or you may hate it, may hate it, may hate it, and throw up on your seat. Thanks for reviewing it, subduing it, imbuing it, and making it unique. And when it's finished, it's finished, it's finished, many a reader will wail, gnash, and weep. Al 00:40 27 11 p.s. Please let me know how many flash links it needs. Thanks!
Well, it's certainly interesting, from what I've seen so far. Did you add flash? You could... not add flash... remove any it has... *kitty eyes* ~ Pointy *shifty eyes* (talk) • (stalk) -- 20101127 - 00:45 (UTC)
No flash, just joshin' you, poking you in the ribs. It does need at least one more pop-up though, it has two now and one of those is a classic if I may say so myself /thank you (bows) thank you (bows again) Aleister 1:15 27 11
Just put in the third pop-up, this one in the last section. lol. Another classic if I may say so myself /bows again, doffs hat, yet another bow, thank you thank you Aleister 1:32 lol 27 11
MMm, 'kay. You know, the saying how many popups there are is actually a pretty good idea - so easy to miss them, otherwise. Wish I'd thought of that when I'd badgered flamingo into reviewing that one of mine; I think he missed the dead hamster completely.
Anyway, I'm definitely going to work on this, now. ~ Pointy *shifty eyes* (talk) • (stalk) -- 20101127 - 01:59 (UTC)
Thanks! What I've tried to do on pop-ups is try to link to four or five words, at least a longer link than usual and one that looks random if viewed as an article link. That seems to make it noticable and may get a pointy at and be seen. That last one still has me lol. Thanks again. And I do find your reviews very useful, in whatever state they're written in! Aleister 2:04 27 11
Mmm, longer is a good idea... and good, good.
And shhh! This is a library! Anyhoo, I'm actually doing this, now. Really. I swear. ~ Pointy *shifty eyes* (talk) • (stalk) -- 20101127 - 03:55 (UTC)


Concept: 7 Oh, right... concept. Before I forget to do this completely. Did I mention at some point that I didn't write this in order? Well, I am now. Pardon the repetition, and the confusion. Because this is kind of important, and stuff. At least, I think it is. And this has a very interesting conceptually angley pointy thingy, indeed... only problems would lie with the alienation of folks who would be insulted (although presentation can and will and does make up for a fair amount of that here) and folks who just don't find religiosity stuff that funny. But nobody cares about them.

Some bits confused me, but I'll just throw those in with the section-by-section bit, which I'll throw in the humour section to make it look like I did every part of this review.

Humour: 8 ...
  • Introduction - Strong intro, that. Don't assume we're familiar with popular culture, though...
Wait, this doesn't even really lead into the main article, though. It's related, but the transition is so abrupt.
The know 'virgin' notion within this is pretty funny. Thought I'd point that out.
  • The Game of Tag - So is the 'it' the one that has to go buzz? Well, knock, really... but otherwise, what is this? Or was it just a random thing that happened? But then what was the it?
  • Cheese on Pizza - why do so many things get lost? Any theories? But the whole Judas thing confuses me. Peraps it's just lack of familiarity with the lore... could you use links for explanations, perhaps?
And why did whatever happened please onlookers?
  • The invention of Baseball - this Mary really is the epitome of the stubborn, motherly woman... who just happens to be a rather popular whore and mother of Jesus, to boot, eh? Anyhow, the notion of her giving them a stick and a ball amuses me.
Notion of her 'fucking their brains out,' though, is a little... it's so much. I dunno.
  • Peanut Butter and Jelly Sandwiches - seems so practical, though whimsical. Literally. Apparently people liked them, eh?
  • Good penmanship - What an odd series of events. And Peter's subsequent more improbable series of events demands a link or something to whatever it is to which you are referring.
Okay, that quote is just horrible. Well done.
Also, I like this use of a wok.
  • Modern Air Travel and Space Flight - Hmm... consequences, eh? Long term, at that... like a bloody butterfly effect.
Why was Jesus so angry, though? He had been trying to get his mum to service them before, but to no avail... seems a strange turn.
  • Banknotes - made me laugh when I finally noticed what you'd called this, here... nice. Certainly took me long enough, though...
Prose and formatting: 5 Well, as is my wont with your stuff, I of course took the liberty of giving it a proofreading. Aaand, as is not so unusual either, I also had no idea what was intentional or not, so I just left it... so how convenient that I happen to also be writing a review this time, eh? Don't answer that. Seriously. Don't.

Grammars stuff:

  • 'Old movie classic' - you mean one specifically? If so, how about a link? Oooh, you have one later... hmm. Okay. Yes, I'm just doing this part as I go.
  • 'Pay for us now and at the hour of our sweat.' - if that's intentional, good play on words, except it doesn't entirely make sense, grammatically...
  • Cheese on pizza section - the phrase makes for a bit of a run-on sentence, I think. Or does it?
  • Some of your sentence structure annoys me. Like you have too many clauses in commas - why not move them around so less are in the middles of sentences? I'd do some of that myself, but my brain's not working. Although I may have anyway. I can't remember.
  • The transitions between the sections themselves are... choppy. It's a list, section, section, section, section... but why are they in the order they are in? How do they reasonably go from one to the next? What's the logical shift of ideas? Did I mess up any of the transitions on accident? Oops...
  • For that matter, are you paralelling something? I mean, structure-wise? Such that each is following after the structure of some religious thingy, or some such... and was I going somewhere with this question? Eh, something about consistency, I think. Between the sections. Consistency... or not. Consistency can be good.

I like how you end every section with 'Amen'... you could even link each amen to something amenny or something. That might be good. Or not. I dunno.

And it all gets bigger as it goes, doesn't it? So that's the ordering of the sections? Seems to work pretty well, esepcially the last one getting so huge that... eh. Hugeness. I mean... well, it works rather well, I mean. Not hugeness, though. Broadness? Bedth? Span? Does it really matter?

Well, eh. Isn't this the worst unwanted proofreading you've ever gotten? On the plus side, you're also getting this terribly assembled prose section of a review... oh, the irony.

Images: 7 As ever, you do have a way with pictures. Fortunately, I'm very good at complaining and can thus come up with something to say, anyway. It might even wind up helpful, but don't count on it.

Thumbs:

  • Mary herself - I can see why you were against captioning this one. Says it all already. Has some issues I might like to take up with the painter, but that's another matter...
  • The pizza - ack! I missed a comma! It needs a comma. Looks tasty, though... bit small; silly people, uploading images like that... seen any bigger ones around?
  • The angel - I know I tend to complain about things being too big a lot, but this is too big, both for the quality of the image itself - the thing was saved rather terrible, and shows some major compression artefacting, and just for smaller screens. On my laptop, it takes up over half the width of the article, which just seems excessive.
Problem is, I'm not understanding what's actually going on here - what's going on here? She met an angel on a ledge, or something? This may make more sense to me later.
  • The space plane - no witty caption? Aww...

Pop-ups:

  • But they're all at the bottom of the article... poor top of the article. Ballance would be nice. Wish I could suggest something, but you know your way around the images of this place better than I do.
  • Sandwich - yum. Why do you have it displaying at greater than optimal size, though?
  • Angel - image within an image... well, a caption, anyway. Now that I would not have thought of, but it does fit. The similarity is a mite uncanny, too.
  • Angry Jesus - Niiice.

Hmm... yup, three. Seems to be all of them.

Miscellaneous: 7 Normally when I'm on here, this out of it, at this time of the morning, I'd be doing something to get myself banned... but reading this article as it is already is a whole lot better than a ban. Yes. Which means it's good, or something. Which is my overall impression, or something. I should actually fill in the numbers now... there. I think I tried to make them make sense, and not just put sevens everywhere. Er... I like sevens? Sorry. Did I mention I don't really like scoring these?
Final Score: 34 Um... you'll probably want to come talk to me after I've slept this off - then you'll be able to get some sort of intelligent explanations. Apologies for this mess of a review. I'll try to make up for it. On monday. At midnight. Because then it will be okay. (Or in 5-10 hours, for that matter.)

On the off chance that this does make any sort of sense and contains useful comments/information/disparate ramblings, however... um... wow? I think all this really needs is some wheedling some of the flow bits and smooth out the overall flow... wait, no. Other way around - keep it all making sense, and work on the overall flow? Yeah... it has humours for those that would appreciate this sort of thing at all, I think, and rather well, at that.

Reviewer: ~ Pointy *shifty eyes* (talk) • (stalk) -- 20101127 - 09:05 (UTC)
7
Bloink
Concept
The idea, the angle, the grand funny of the article...
Oh, right... concept. Before I forget to do this completely. Did I mention at some point that I didn't write this in order? Well, I am now. Pardon the repetition, and the confusion. Because this is kind of important, and stuff. At least, I think it is. And this has a very interesting conceptually angley pointy thingy, indeed... only problems would lie with the alienation of folks who would be insulted (although presentation can and will and does make up for a fair amount of that here) and folks who just don't find religiosity stuff that funny. But nobody cares about them.

Some bits confused me, but I'll just throw those in with the section-by-section bit, which I'll throw in the humour section to make it look like I did every part of this review.

8
Bloink
Humour
The implementation, how funny the article comes out...
...
  • Introduction - Strong intro, that. Don't assume we're familiar with popular culture, though...
Wait, this doesn't even really lead into the main article, though. It's related, but the transition is so abrupt.
The know 'virgin' notion within this is pretty funny. Thought I'd point that out.
  • The Game of Tag - So is the 'it' the one that has to go buzz? Well, knock, really... but otherwise, what is this? Or was it just a random thing that happened? But then what was the it?
  • Cheese on Pizza - why do so many things get lost? Any theories? But the whole Judas thing confuses me. Peraps it's just lack of familiarity with the lore... could you use links for explanations, perhaps?
And why did whatever happened please onlookers?
  • The invention of Baseball - this Mary really is the epitome of the stubborn, motherly woman... who just happens to be a rather popular whore and mother of Jesus, to boot, eh? Anyhow, the notion of her giving them a stick and a ball amuses me.
Notion of her 'fucking their brains out,' though, is a little... it's so much. I dunno.
  • Peanut Butter and Jelly Sandwiches - seems so practical, though whimsical. Literally. Apparently people liked them, eh?
  • Good penmanship - What an odd series of events. And Peter's subsequent more improbable series of events demands a link or something to whatever it is to which you are referring.
Okay, that quote is just horrible. Well done.
Also, I like this use of a wok.
  • Modern Air Travel and Space Flight - Hmm... consequences, eh? Long term, at that... like a bloody butterfly effect.
Why was Jesus so angry, though? He had been trying to get his mum to service them before, but to no avail... seems a strange turn.
  • Banknotes - made me laugh when I finally noticed what you'd called this, here... nice. Certainly took me long enough, though...
5
Bloink
Prose and formatting
Appearance, flow, overall presentation...
Well, as is my wont with your stuff, I of course took the liberty of giving it a proofreading. Aaand, as is not so unusual either, I also had no idea what was intentional or not, so I just left it... so how convenient that I happen to also be writing a review this time, eh? Don't answer that. Seriously. Don't.

Grammars stuff:

  • 'Old movie classic' - you mean one specifically? If so, how about a link? Oooh, you have one later... hmm. Okay. Yes, I'm just doing this part as I go.
  • 'Pay for us now and at the hour of our sweat.' - if that's intentional, good play on words, except it doesn't entirely make sense, grammatically...
  • Cheese on pizza section - the phrase makes for a bit of a run-on sentence, I think. Or does it?
  • Some of your sentence structure annoys me. Like you have too many clauses in commas - why not move them around so less are in the middles of sentences? I'd do some of that myself, but my brain's not working. Although I may have anyway. I can't remember.
  • The transitions between the sections themselves are... choppy. It's a list, section, section, section, section... but why are they in the order they are in? How do they reasonably go from one to the next? What's the logical shift of ideas? Did I mess up any of the transitions on accident? Oops...
  • For that matter, are you paralelling something? I mean, structure-wise? Such that each is following after the structure of some religious thingy, or some such... and was I going somewhere with this question? Eh, something about consistency, I think. Between the sections. Consistency... or not. Consistency can be good.

I like how you end every section with 'Amen'... you could even link each amen to something amenny or something. That might be good. Or not. I dunno.

And it all gets bigger as it goes, doesn't it? So that's the ordering of the sections? Seems to work pretty well, esepcially the last one getting so huge that... eh. Hugeness. I mean... well, it works rather well, I mean. Not hugeness, though. Broadness? Bedth? Span? Does it really matter?

Well, eh. Isn't this the worst unwanted proofreading you've ever gotten? On the plus side, you're also getting this terribly assembled prose section of a review... oh, the irony.

7
Bloink
Images
The graphics themselves, as well as their humour and relevance...
As ever, you do have a way with pictures. Fortunately, I'm very good at complaining and can thus come up with something to say, anyway. It might even wind up helpful, but don't count on it.

Thumbs:

  • Mary herself - I can see why you were against captioning this one. Says it all already. Has some issues I might like to take up with the painter, but that's another matter...
  • The pizza - ack! I missed a comma! It needs a comma. Looks tasty, though... bit small; silly people, uploading images like that... seen any bigger ones around?
  • The angel - I know I tend to complain about things being too big a lot, but this is too big, both for the quality of the image itself - the thing was saved rather terrible, and shows some major compression artefacting, and just for smaller screens. On my laptop, it takes up over half the width of the article, which just seems excessive.
Problem is, I'm not understanding what's actually going on here - what's going on here? She met an angel on a ledge, or something? This may make more sense to me later.
  • The space plane - no witty caption? Aww...

Pop-ups:

  • But they're all at the bottom of the article... poor top of the article. Ballance would be nice. Wish I could suggest something, but you know your way around the images of this place better than I do.
  • Sandwich - yum. Why do you have it displaying at greater than optimal size, though?
  • Angel - image within an image... well, a caption, anyway. Now that I would not have thought of, but it does fit. The similarity is a mite uncanny, too.
  • Angry Jesus - Niiice.

Hmm... yup, three. Seems to be all of them.

7
Bloink
Miscellaneous
Anything else... or not...
Normally when I'm on here, this out of it, at this time of the morning, I'd be doing something to get myself banned... but reading this article as it is already is a whole lot better than a ban. Yes. Which means it's good, or something. Which is my overall impression, or something. I should actually fill in the numbers now... there. I think I tried to make them make sense, and not just put sevens everywhere. Er... I like sevens? Sorry. Did I mention I don't really like scoring these?
34
Bloink
Final score
~ Pointy *shifty eyes* (talk) • (stalk) -- 20101127 - 09:05 (UTC)
Um... you'll probably want to come talk to me after I've slept this off - then you'll be able to get some sort of intelligent explanations. Apologies for this mess of a review. I'll try to make up for it. On monday. At midnight. Because then it will be okay. (Or in 5-10 hours, for that matter.)

On the off chance that this does make any sort of sense and contains useful comments/information/disparate ramblings, however... um... wow? I think all this really needs is some wheedling some of the flow bits and smooth out the overall flow... wait, no. Other way around - keep it all making sense, and work on the overall flow? Yeah... it has humours for those that would appreciate this sort of thing at all, I think, and rather well, at that.

Personal tools
projects