Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/Ming Dynasty parchment
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|Humour:||4||Just not many jokes. Either that or I am stupider than even I thought. (This is quite possible.)|
|Concept:||5||The difficulty of building an article around a spurious archaeological document is one thing, and adding the caveat that the document will be unreadable by most readers adds to the difficulty. See endnotes.|
|Prose and formatting:||8||Well-written.|
|Images:||0||No images. Find some nice mustachioed gent for the archaeologist, and some paintings of a Ming emperor or two.|
|Miscellaneous:||7||Interesting, but I dunno about it.|
|Reviewer:||----OEJ 13:51, 12 September 2008 (UTC)|
I am sorry but personally I think this needs considerable work. Here is what the reader gets from translating the Chinese.
"So, do you think you are pretty smart all the Chinese people. Here is the news. You are not. Not even a long shot. As for all this reading and all, you should stop now, because it's annoying me. Most definitely. However, I am glad, because you are reading. This is good teeth. Yes, I guess I have little carried away. Your service box for your computer has been successfully replaced by the penis. Such a long time, suction hole! If not, you are a user's search module."
"Therefore, you think you very attractive intelligent Chinese all? Here is a news. You. Even does not have a long-term photography. As for this all reading and all, you should stop now, because of its irritating me. Most affirmed. But I am very happy, because you are read. This is the good tooth. Yes, I suspected that I obtain a spot to lift from the scene. Your block's service has succeeded the substitution penis for yours computer. Such long, attracts the hole! If does not have, you are a user's search module."
There are two difficulties I see here.
First, it takes reader effort to copy the text and go to a site to have it translated. Readers are notoriously lazy -- they want to sit on their butts and be entertained, not make an effort.
Second, if they do go to the trouble of translating the Chinese it turns out to be a bit incoherent and not too funny anyway.
The English part of the article is mostly pretty straightforward and quite short.
I might suggest considerable work on the English body of the article. It should be long enough to stand alone and entertain readers even if they don't bother with the translation of the Chinese. You might think about satirizing the Chinese dynastic system, pretentious archaeologists, and/or scholarly research into trivial and obscure archaeological topics. But I would strongly recommend making the article longer and funnier.
Also, I would link to the real Google translation service and not to the Uncyc article on Google translate. If the reader is inclined to make the effort to translate the Chinese, linking to the Uncyc article is not helpful. And I might rewrite the Chinese to be more relevant and funnier -- a parody Viagra spam, or the famous Nigerian financial spam. Or something.
I'm sorry this review is turning out so negative. It is of course only my opinion, and I am a famously cretinesque fellow. Others may read the piece differently.
Good luck with this; it is a very challenging concept. ----OEJ 13:51, 12 September 2008 (UTC)