Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/Metal Gear Solid 4

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edit Metal Gear Solid 4

Yeahright 17:44, 18 June 2009 (UTC)

Needless to say, I'm just the guy to get this. —Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 21:31, 18 June 2009 (UTC)
Just rewrite it, Guildy. I was reeeeeeeeeally anticipating this from you, and this idiot jumps in front and takes it. ~~Sir Fightstar Rocks! CUN 22:08, 18 June 2009 (UTC)
Humour: 4 First off, you're obviously a fan of my articles, as you copy them pretty blatantly. This also seems to be your first article, and let me tell you something, it's a hell of a lot better than my first article (though still not very good, unfortunately).

Anyway, since I was planning on eventually doing this, here are some things I was going to do:

  • Have cutscene and gameplay subheaders of the different act sections. This way you can juxtapose the absurd amount of cutscenes with the small amount of gameplay.
  • Have a themes & symbolism section, as there is actually a great deal of it in MGS4, including funny things like homoeroticism and sexual innuendo.
  • Avoid stupid gamecruft, like "Raiden pwns stuff," etc.

I could tell you more, but that would be telling you to essentially write the article how I would've, and that's a poor review. Instead, I will conclude this section by saying some of the stuff you do have is conceptually sound (the game is ridiculous, the Mk. II is totally fucking useless, there's no reason Snake should even be on this mission, etc.), but it reeks of gamecruft and (as we will soon see) really poor grammar. Fix this.

Concept: 10 I'm more-or-less obligated to give you a ten here, because you copy my articles. If I know two things, it's that 1) Metal Gear is awesome, and 2) I'm awesome.

In all seriousness, one of the key conceptual things about my articles you either totally missed or ignored in favor of doing something else is the fact that, in all of my articles, Snake is "infilitrating" them, I.E. his mission is to read the article he is a part of, hence the difference between the codec calls and the actual "article" text. You don't do this, or, if you're trying to, you don't make it very apparent. Not that this is a problem; just because you largely copy me doesn't mean you have to completely copy me, but if you're not pursuing that same angle, then it begs the question of "why include Codec stuff at all?", unless you are, in fact, just completely copying me, and doing a very poor job of it.

Prose and formatting: 2 There's a plethora of really minor and major spelling mistakes, and these have to be fixed. That, and you could probably afford at least one more major section. Finally, the article should be titled "Metal Gear Solid 4: Guns of the Patriots," because that's the full title of the game.
Images: 6 All your images are fairly standard, though many of them are extremely small, which is bad. It's better to have three or four well-sized pictures than seven that are the size of my little pinkynail, you know?
Miscellaneous: 5 You get ten points here because you copy me, and then lose five of those ten points because you copy me.
Final Score: 27 I would be more than willing to help you fix this up. If you're interested, hit me up on my talkpage. If not, you're more than welcome to tackle this on your own, too. Regardless of my beliefs otherwise, I don't own everything Metal Gear-related on this site, and you're more than welcome to take this in whatever direction you want.
Reviewer: Unführer Guildy Ritter von Guildensternenstein 22:15, 18 June 2009 (UTC)
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