Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/Long Sentences

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edit Long Sentences

I`m pretty sure that this article will fail this Pee Review-thing, not sure, but who is really sure these days? Anyway, I want a nice and honest review from this my article, let`s see what happens; roses or just bad language?

OMG!!! It`s Cat the Colourful, Jesus Christ!!! 14:30 15 June 2011 14:30, June 15, 2011 (UTC)

Right. EpicAwesomeness (talk) 15:15, July 3, 2011 (UTC)
Humour: 6 Well, it's kind of a novelty, a one-joke wonder, this article is. The main source of entertainment is the fact that it's made up of - who'da guessed it - long sentences. It's a bit funny at first but then it, well, goes down a bit, and becomes a kind of rush to get in jokes and long sentences at the same time. Soon the narrator guy begins commenting on the fact that he's succeding in writing this. Like: I have thought this question something like millions of wasting times, and still I think it`s very brilliant, awesome, cool, frozen, beige, pink, superb and even a bit cool. Yes, I used just few seconds ago two sentences, listed funny words and even repeated myself saying cool two times, am I good, huh? Now, this may just pass if it's a one time thing and the first part is more orderly, but this first/second person theme just kind of flows through the article and eventually loses some of its punch. You might want to consider trying to make it a bit more encyclopedically written, with ony two or three coments about the length of the sentences in the article itself.
Concept: 5.6 The concept is more than a bit obvious. Still, it has quite a bit of potential in it (see humour).
Prose and formatting: 6.89 This article's 'voice', so to speak, fluctates from slightly dry to flat out conversational, and it would be best if you chose between one or the other. What's more, the sentences do get a bit, well, ugly, in order to keep them long. You really may want to rethink the sentence structures here. Another thing, when each sentence finishes, it's like the end of a new paragraph. You may want to stretch out some of the topics further. No real spelling mistakes as far as I can see, although some grammar mistakes may be present. If you can, run it through Word and do a spellcheck.
Images: 6.75 The only picture here is of 'Kitler' and that has absolutely nothing to do with long sentences. Luckily, the description not only makes a point of this, but goes on to question this and goes off on a completely unrelated tangent, which is funny but may just drag on a wee bit too long.
Miscellaneous: 6.3 Used the Pee template.
Final Score: 31.54 Well, this certainly needs some work to be truly good but I will admit that this article has lots of potential. Kudos to you, Cat.
Reviewer: EpicAwesomeness (talk) 15:15, July 3, 2011 (UTC)
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