IMHO, this is funny as Hell. The mix of truth and truthiness is good, in that without knowing better, they are hard to distinguish. This was fun to read, and I laughed out loud twice... that's not easy to induce.
The reference to Nancy Kerrigan was almost, but not quite, over the top... congratulations on pulling that off! I can think of no way to make expand on the concept without ruining the article.
Prose and formatting:
The writing is readable, has a good flow, topics are well presented and orderly, logical. There is a clear theme and story from start to finish, with no holes. Using so many one-liners, while keeping the overall theme coherent is an impressive feat.
There are plenty of, but not too many, images. They all work well within the article, and are funny in their own right. The only little thing is placement is a bit awkward.
The numerous directions this article takes, yet still manages to remain consistent, impresses me a whole bunch.
I feel badly that I can't say more about this work. I honestly have nothing bad to say about it, except it's just a bit akwardly formatted. I would tighten up the paragraphs, alternate pics on left and right sides, and that's about it. Excellent effort, merits feature IMHO.