Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/HowTo:Understand a Lady Gaga Music Video (quick)

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edit HowTo:Understand a Lady Gaga Music Video

Hey everyone! Just wrote this article on a whim after reminiscing on this year's VMAs. Just want to hear your guys' input, so it can be a good, nice quality Uncyclopedia article.

--βia§ EATS <insert name here>es all the time :) 22:41, November 8, 2010 (UTC)

I think I can get this one pretty soon. --Tophat headless 23:02, November 13, 2010 (UTC)
Humour: 5 Well... There as much as I hate to say it, this article isn't that funny. Which is too bad because it has a great idea. More on that later. Now that's not to say it's bad, it could just use some work. So first there's the introduction. Which I found to be the funnest part of the whole article. Which is good, because it's obviously the longest part of the article. So the first joke I saw there was the part about children spontaneously combusting. Which made me laugh and laugh. I really can't tell you why it was soo funny, it just was. Anothere thing I would like to talk about is these two jokes: The first one was the MS disorder joke. The second one went with the first one, it was the one about doctors prescribing Valium, Xanax, LSD or hard liquor. The difference between those two jokes is this: I disliked the first one, I found it stupid and unfunny. But I liked the second one. I found that one funny because it was like the exact opposite of what any doctor would do. Also just because of the nature of most lady gaga music videos. I think most of your jokes would go over better if you played on that more. But like I said before the introduction is the best part of the article. So next is the part is "STEP 1: Get Over the Fact that What you Just Witnessed Probably Wasn’t Legal to Film in the First Place". In my humble opinion The first paragraph whas just summing up the "Bad Romance" video. It needs more content! Anyway, the second and third paragraph about waching the video again. I found to be fine. The next part was "STEP 2: Actually Analyze the Video for Symbols Now". which was really just pictures. Which would be fine, if you actually interpreted any of them. Also even worse you just spelled out the video again. Which as we know from earlier is bad. Next was "STEP 3: Google the Symbols for Information" which is actually not that bad. All I really have to say about it is this: It needs more non list content. Then came "STEP 4: Analyze the Data and Make Conclusions". Which I found (not to be mean) useless. Not the whole section just the content in it. Well crap... That sounded weird. Ok bottom line: Keep the section rewrite the content. Reason being: it almost spells out all the jokes made in the previous section. It is ok to be subtle, it won't kill you. I promise! So maybe you could talk about how to analize the data, instead of what result the reader will get. As a great uncyclopedian once told me: "The most important part of a How to is the How to part.". So then comes your closer: "Congratulations! You've Done it!". Nothing really wrong with this part. I actually kinda like it.
Concept: 9 Great concept! It has lots of promise. It's just the execution that needs a little work.
Prose and formatting: 6 Well I put a 5 here because I really don't know. I'm really not that good at typed grammar and punctuation myself. But I did catch a couple "grammar violations". Put here into a nige little list:
  • You said "It causes small children to spontaneously combust. Violently.". And frankly I don't believe "Violently" is a full sentence.
  • Also saying "Violently." after "It causes small children to spontaneously combust." is a bit redundant. Just saying.
  • At one point you said: "Luckily, I, a completely". Well I don't think there needs to be a comma after "Luckily".

If you want your article(s) to have better grammar and punctuation there is an uncyclopedia proofreading service. Other than that I have nothing else to say. I thought your secions were in good order. So good job I guess.

Images: 6 I thought they were fine. Not great, but fine. I guess the last image could bee a little lower, so it's actually next to the text it goes with.
Miscellaneous: 6.5 I averaged your score here.
Final Score: 32.5 So all in all not a bad article. Needs some work, but I think it coud become a really good article. 32.5 Not bad at all. So now I must say goodby, and happy editing!
Reviewer: --Tophat headless 02:19, November 14, 2010 (UTC)
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