Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/HowTo:Drive a train (nth review*; quick)

From Uncyclopedia, the content-free encyclopedia

< Uncyclopedia:Pee Review
Revision as of 19:24, August 22, 2008 by Hyperbole (talk | contribs)

(diff) ← Older revision | Latest revision (diff) | Newer revision → (diff)
Jump to: navigation, search

FAQ

edit HowTo:Drive a train

*Where n equals 3 or 4, I can't remember, it's been ages since last time.

So Cajek foolishly piqued my interest in this, what I feel is my best article, again. I think I know where it's at, just want a quick review to make sure. ―― Sir Heerenveen, KUN [UotM RotM VFH FFS SK CM NS OME™] (talk), 18/08 12:37

Masaru

PEE REVIEW IN PROGRESS

Hyperbole is engaged in the dual processes
of giving you his opinion and pretending you care.
Humour: 7.5 Okay, a quick review it is.

I like it. Honestly, it's a little sloppy in places, but it's got some good jokes. I liked "and you realise that one of the train's metal wheels has, frankly, blown the fuck up." And I liked the general concept that driving a train is more complicated than rocket science, despite the fact that in reality, a monkey could probably do it. Also, some of the jokes hiding behind links were pretty amusing. I also enjoyed the idea that the train went to both Liverpool and Alabama, although "Mars" might have been overkill. Liverpool, Alabama and Tokyo might have been funnier. Or Ouagadougu.

A few thoughts: first, there's no indication of when the train actually started moving. That should be fixed. Second, I'm not sure about all the references to time intervals. They seem redundant and not that funny. Also, the Polish jokes seem... weird. I can't figure out why they're in there.

Concept: 7.5 Good concept, as I said. One thought: is this really a "HowTo"? It seems almost more like an UnBook, being written in the second person and containing a narrative and everything.
Prose and formatting: 5.5 There are a few problems with the prose and formatting. At some points, especially at the beginning, the article is modulating between the past and present tense. In terms of formatting, some of these paragraphs are way too long and get a little tedious.
Images: 8 Not bad, especially the last one.
Miscellaneous: 6 Six, for kicks.
Final Score: 34.5 Your article has been quick-reviewed. I hope this was in any way helpful. Cheers!
Reviewer: Tinymasaru.gifpillow talk 19:24, 22 August 2008 (UTC)
Personal tools
projects