Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/HowTo:Be a Loyal Employee

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edit HowTo:Be a Loyal Employee

Cajek and I did another writing contest of some sort. This is the page I wrote with his suggested title. --THE 22:32, 8 April 2008 (UTC)

Humour: 9 i thought this was good! playing on those people that drive themselves into the ground by overworking to impress a boss. it was really funny. the ultimate in self destruction; too much self improvement (someone must have said that before me...).
Concept: 8 very good concept it works really well as everyone wants to be a good employee but you can be too good. like i said, and like most of these How Tos, the selfdestructive aspect is funny.
Prose and formatting: 9 almost perfect your spelling and grammar et al, is fine and the article flows well from one thing to another. there really is almost nothing you can improve on. although maybe some of your headings are a bit long, things like "give everything you own to your boss" could just be "give everything to your boss" it makes it more streamlined, trim the fat basically.
Images: 5 you've only got the two and i think that an article this long could maybe use another. the one at the top isn't especially funny (and i am assuming you meant "Employee" not "Customer"(if you did mean customer that's just confusing)) and up at the top it's kinda out of context, if you must keep it move it to the "Refuse pay" section. the gif though i thought was really funny. if you do add another pic try and get a pic of those life-size lego houses and claim that you can indeed live of company produce, obviously, add this to the "Only purchase items made by your company" section.
Miscellaneous: 7.75 (averaged other scores)
Final Score: 38.75 this is a very good article and really all that needs sorting out are your images and then i'd be happy to put this up for VFH
Reviewer: --orian57 16:01, 9 April 2008 (UTC)
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