Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/Homework can cause more than Papercuts

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edit Homework can cause more than Papercuts

This is my First time writing an article on the site, looking for any tips, revisions, advice etc. Comments are greatly appreciated! Thanks in advanced Volatile 18:07, 22 January 2009 (UTC)

Outhouse   Tagstit   doesn't believe in new fancy-pancy toilet systems with running water and all. Just a hole in the ground with a lil' cover will do. Now gimme' your article and I'll be done in a few minutes.

While you are welcome to review this, I suggest you find another article in need of help so that we can clear the ever growing Pee Request list.

Humour: 2 Alright, before you get your hopes down, you should know that all scores are easily fixable and there is only MAJOR problem. The major problem falls under the humor section. The problem is randomness. The main problem may in fact be in the concept though but most of your humor is as random as hell anyways! Reading through it there is a majority of random stuff, and only a small fraction of writing on actually the question asked by the Why?. There is jokes on Hannah Montana, Hitler, and even September 11th. You need to get rid of most of that, if not all of that if you want it to survive VFD. Concentrate your ideas and find jokes more on humor in order for it to be relevant and therefore funny. Most random humor ends up sounding stupid. For help, go to HTBFANJS
Concept: 2 This concept is very weak. First of all, it is Why?: Homework can cause more than papercuts. This would seem to think the reader is going to read about how homework can cause boredom and a waste of time. Instead, you don't include anything about that at all, and instead talk about random stories you have made up about homework. Stick to your topic! Don't go off unless if it is very rare and for a point. Next, this topic in itself is weak. It sounds like an angry 6th grader who hates homework and decides to make fun of it. You need to choose a topic that is fresh and original. This will improve your humor as well as concept. For your next article, I suggest putting thought into it, and knowing what you are going to do. Then, be relevant to your topic.
Prose and formatting: 4 Ill be quick here. Your article is just a wall of text. It is messy and has no headers. You must add headers in order to clean up your article by typing in ==(Section Name)==. This will help the neatness of your article, and make it feel more professional. There were not many spelling errors but the style in which you write is not very consistent, and encyclopedic.
Images: 0 No pictures, you need to add them to improve the look and feel, as well as to improve the attraction of your article.
Miscellaneous: 2 Averaged
Final Score: 10 This isn't as bad as it seems! Just choose a better topic and writing style and everything will improve itself. If you need anything I am happy to help on my talk page. Good luck!
Reviewer: --Tagstit 09:20, 24 January 2009 (UTC)

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