Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/Good Old Days

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edit Good Old Days

I rewrote some sections of this article and added some more. Icons-flag-pi Pirate Lord__Sonic80 (Yell  •  Latest literary excretion) __ 02:10, August 2, 2010 (UTC)

Ok ill actually do thise one. I don't know what the rules are, but give me a day, two tops. --Happymonkey39 LAZARWeegeeheadbobinDomo kun dance1 Dah Meme Master 05:59, August 2, 2010 (UTC) Booking cleared, anyone can do this one now. --ChiefjusticeWii 09:17, August 9, 2010 (UTC)

Ok this is way overdue...and i got banned for not doing this so i guess i really should get cracking... --Happymonkey39 LAZARWeegeeheadbobinDomo kun dance1 Dah Meme Master 23:56, August 14, 2010 (UTC)


Humour: 8 Before I begin I must simply say, congratulations. There are two things I usually hate in articles. One is that there is too much information thus having no humor. The other is when people mention nazi..since I'm jewish. But you my friend had both and yet still made me laugh!

Now of course, there were still problems, and the truth is that there was too much info, but somehow you did get humor in there. Heres a breakdown to make it easier for you.

Intro

  • WHOA...that quote is HUGE. Too big, yet still funny...huh...to tell you the truth I don't know if you should keep it or disintegrate it. I mean it's funny, and yet too long, I'd say the best move would be to shorten it so that you get the joke out there but don't scare people away with this gigantic quote right at the start! And for good lord sake, change the link from Oscar Wilde to Leroy Jenkins! You do know who he is right?
  • ...Did you use blue text or something? I mean not only are there TONS of quotes but there all...pointless. Heres what you got to know. Quotes are good. Too many quotes are bad. Funny quotes are great. Too many funny quotes...well there is no such thing. These words should not be linked. When you link words like bad and good you have to link funny things like this: bad good...or something like that, it depends on your sense of humor. But it's still ok to link normal words, in fact I sort of encourage it. But like I said, not words that are boring, words that people would actually check out the articles on. And red links are not a bad thing, especially if it's a joke. Like so: FML.
  • I did like your confusion, because now is better than then, meaning then was better than then's then but not nows then. I find that funny... yet it does give some people headaches.

Copeting Theories of Old Day-related Goodness

  • Ugh I don't mean to offend in any way here, but this part really really isn't that funny. That is because of one of my golden rules...facts aren't funny. Funny facts are funny. This part just goes on and on and on about stuff that doesn't have any humor behind it. In my opinion I would say this whole part actually has to be re-written or even replaced...but somehow keep the angry old white man, WHITE POWER, and the cancer quote...wow that sounds weird to anyone else that reads this...

What Made those days better than these days?

  • Thank the lord you made this! It's absolute genius. Somehow you even made racism funny! I don't know how but you did...great job on this one.
  • Out of the four, the great depression is the weakest. It needs more jokes and lest facts about markets. Maybe a few funny links would help it.
  • There isn't actually much I can say about this part because it was so perfectly done...only way to make it better is to actually add another section. Maybe something on music? Movies? Radios?...if you haven't caught on yet, i mean entertainment/media. Be sure to mention record players if you do make this section.

Death of the good ol'days

  • A good thing to do is go out with a big bang, this was more of a "dynamite Stick" rather than a "Nuke" so to speak. I like the quote, but there really should be more. Another paragraph would do it, but I truly can't say what. I absolutely love your last line however. GENIUS!


Overall great job. I would only say to add more jokes here and there. Don't ever make an article here just facts, theres a place for that, it's called Wikipedia

Concept: 9 GREAT JOB! In most cases, people don't seem to take advantage of their articles name...thus meaning, bad job. You did take advantage of it big time. Now the main thing you are missing is something i thought was obvious...when i was a boy.

When i was a boy is a very famous line among elderly people. And it's quite similar to the good old days in fact it is the good old days to them. You should have made reference to this line many times. Hell, that could have been on of the theories!

You could have also mentioned things like colorless or games like hopscotch. Those typical old people stereotypes.

Prose and formatting: 10 Clean, no spelling or grammar mistakes in sight. Page is organized neatly and well. No need for a score under ten!
Images: 8 1st Image:

This one is great, it's a good quality picture of junk, with a cleaver caption!

2nd Image: Not quite sure what the caption is saying...who is captain orange? But hell the picture suits the article...so i would say to keep the picture but defiantly change the caption

3rd Image: This image is not needed. It's caption is not that funny and the picture itself isn't either. Lets face it, old Asians look funnier that old black dude, i would blame the karate kid for that.


I like how you didn't spam the page with picture, and that you also didn't do the opposite and have no pictures at all. But the last picture should be replace, something shout go there, but not that picture. I understand it's supposed to go with the racism topic, but it's really not necessary.

Miscellaneous: 8.75 Did the typical thing and averaged the scores.
Final Score: 43.75 One thing i have to say is about the quotes. I may have only mentioned it in the intro, but what i said there goes for the full article, there are too many pointless quotes, and too little humorous ones.

But congrats, you did one hell of a job. After the quote adjustments and the small other touch ups I would say to put it up for VFH

...wait...this wasn't yours...ugh I wish i knew that *facepalm*. Well what you wrote were all the funny parts, so great job.

And for a final tip, I think that the article should actually be called "Good ol' Days" or is it "Good 'ol Days"...either way, i think that would just plain sound better. Up to you.

And yes if you were wondering, I made this one extra long because of the wait i put you through...well sorta.

Reviewer: --Happymonkey39 LAZARWeegeeheadbobinDomo kun dance1 Dah Meme Master 00:54, August 15, 2010 (UTC)
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