Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/Go karts (quick)
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Srevihc 12:29, 25 September 2008 (UTC)
|Humour:||6||Had some funny stuff, but suffers from a bit of a random feel. Also, it is (as you probably know) rather underdeveloped.|
|Concept:||7||Good topic for an article.|
|Prose and formatting:||7||This is hard to rate, as the article is intentionally goofy: "...the seeds of their ownage had been knitted" is silly, you can't knit seeds, but that's OK.|
|Images:||0||Find some images.|
|Miscellaneous:||7||I hope this succeeds.|
|Reviewer:||----OEJ 14:14, 25 September 2008 (UTC)|
OK, even a silly article written in a goofy style needs to have some length and a standard structure. I've written several intentionally goofy articles, and each has at least three sections organized into the usual introductory summary followed by more specific sections. For your piece I standardized the quote at the beginning and added categories at the bottom, but you should organize some sections and whatnot.
I would recommend you create an introductory section. It could simply consist of:
- "Go karts can be anything, from a 29 wheel drive thumbtack to a jet powered pot noodle. Either way they all have to have six wheels to qualify as a go kart."
Or you could expand that just a bit: "Go karts are motorized thingumbobs specialized for driving through thickets and bogs and tea-rooms. They can be anything, from....etc."
Then create a History or Origins section starting with "The go kart was invented by an Eskimo thousands of years ago...".
Finally, you should have a Go Karts in the Modern Era section at least, in which you can describe modern usage, pwnage, innovations, and renovations.
Optional expansions could include odd topics like Famous Users and their Favorite Go Karts, Breeding Go Karts for Fun and Pwnage, The Role of Mud, or any other goofy shit that strikes your fancy. But do expand the piece.
Finally, some general advice: Make the piece as logically consistent as you can. There seems to be a bit of randomness in the narrative of the original elephant on wheels with an engine and the later statements about go karts living on landfills and raping Yorkshirewomen to produce George Bush. What I'm thinking here is that while a six-wheeled elephant is silly and everyone likes to beat up on George, it doesn't work well as a stand-in for talking about real go karts and the madmen who drive them. Unbridled fantasy is OK, but the best jokes often consist of reality folded like origami into an unexpected shape. So I would counsel you to think about how you want to incorporate and satirize reality in the piece.
And get some pictures. Seriously. It should be easy to photoshop a bunch of wheels onto an elephant or a vehicle and make it look all gnarly and vile and dank.
Good luck --
----OEJ 14:14, 25 September 2008 (UTC)