Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/Cosby Canard

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edit Cosby Canard

Your editorial and humoristic skills will be thanked and favoured explicitly by yours truly. --AmericanBastard 04:06, 31 December 2008 (UTC)

Humour: 5 The humor is there but it takes a lot of work to find it because of the prose and formatting (see below). The history section starts with randomizer dates and numbers, which has the tendency to make everything else look like it was written by a bunch of Manatees. (see "South Park" episodes 1003-4) The quotes at the bottom are either unnecessary or out-of-place as well.
Concept: 8 I love the concept, you can drive a truck through it! It works much better than "connery canard" because Cosby has a universal appeal for imitation amongst stand-up comedians.
Prose and formatting: 5 You're killing yourself here! First off, the opening "general definition" section should be shortened by moving your syntax example (2nd paragraph) to the syntax section and marry the information. Syntax should be the second section after the general definition. The entire History section just looks like a sore thumb amongst the mechanical definition sections of the canard. Very Important: I'm sure you're aware of the term "listy", right? There are no lists in this article but I feel like I've been subjected to a bunch of little lists and that's because your sentences are overloaded with verbal twists and turns. If it's a difficult read for me, It's safe to say that joe-six-pack won't make it through this article. The language is flamboyant and overly proper so it's appeal may be limited to collegiate English minor or better.
Images: 5 Very conservative here. The 1986 scandal information needs to be married. Take it off the thumb and place into the page space. We need one creative photo here. Maybe someone reacting to the canard after it being received at an improper moment with an inappropriate canard?
Miscellaneous: 5 There's that 5 again. It's good enough to stay in mainspace but it's bad enough to be just another article that "Coulda been a contender. Coulda been somebody, instead of a bum, which is what It is" (On the Waterfront 1954) You're being too technical in this article and need to simplify the language. Replace the lengthy English lesson with a graphic that breaks down a canard example with pointers....much funnier. Try to write like you're talking to joe-six-pack, it'll help.
Final Score: 28 One should only have to jump verbal hurdles while studying for a technical degree, not while reading a funny-page. I think the whole basis is fine but I've been put-off by the execution. Mind you, I'm old enough to remember seeing Fat Albert cartoons first-run on American TV and ripping on Cosby is A-OK with me.
Reviewer: --DRStrangesig5 Sherman Fingertalk  21:50, 7 January 2009 (UTC)
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