Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/CREDIT CRUNCH (QUICK)
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18.104.22.168 19:32, 14 September 2008 (UTC)
- I'll review this, For now enjoy Noel with this free coupon. — Sir Sycamore (talk) 11:19, 30 September 2008 (UTC)
For a bumming session with Noel Fielding
|Humour:||5||You asked for a quick review; I think the formatting looks a little listy, and maybe not enough research, irrelevant scientology references hamper the article.
Feels listy and lacks focus, it needs to be trimmed down to make it funnier with closer reference e to the topic rather than just random stuff like Tyra Banks, Gordon Brown trying to get off with Jodi marsh etc. None of the jokes come across to well, too random throughout. Written in third person which is good, lacks impact however as it goes off in tangents.
|Concept:||7||Relevant to the currant affairs, a good topic to write an article on, fairly weak handling here. I think a more close parody of the actual credit crunch rather random stuff will work better.|
|Prose and formatting:||5||Red links, listy, irrelevant references, poorly put together, needs paring down and more work on formatting. Some links are in correct like "Nigerian fraudsters"|
|Images:||5||Pretty weak, no major impact for the article in this department, the third one is awful. Nothing major here; stick to fixing the writing and then worry about images|
|Miscellaneous:||6||Not great needs cleanup and content re-working|
|Final Score:||28||This was my first "quick review" I hope it has helped, I would advise trying to work a little more on it and resubmitting it for an in-depth review. Should you have questions, don't hesitate to leave a not on my talkpage.|
|Reviewer:||— Sir Sycamore (talk) 16:45, 1 October 2008 (UTC)|