Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/Brute

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edit Brute

Hope this article would have a better review than my other one. Oh, and the big picture, I did that on purpose. Iwillkillyou333 02:50, 23 February 2009 (UTC)

Outhouse   Tagstit   doesn't believe in new fancy-pancy toilet systems with running water and all. Just a hole in the ground with a lil' cover will do. Now gimme' your article and I'll be done in a few minutes.

While you are welcome to review this, I suggest you find another article in need of help so that we can clear the ever growing Pee Request list.

Peeing, I did a full review of this and my computer crashed, so this is a summary of what I wrote. If you don't consider it in-depth, just tell me and I will redo it.

Humour: 2 You stick too much to namedropping. When you mention things such as Chuck Norris, Bruce Willis, and Master Chief, this hardly adds humor. Also, you stick to much to injokes, most of which, have been run to the ground. To save this, get rid of ALL of that, and do not go into namedropping or injokes.
Concept: 1 The concept is what kills your humor. You are trying to write on something that has been run to the ground. Grues are in millions of articles, have many templates, and are even the topic of many games. Please, please, do not make any more. This is just expanding on grues by saying there is a supergrue called brutes. This ISNT funny. Please stick with non grue topics. Your other topic, First! was MUCH better because it was more original, and relied more on humor than grues.
Prose and formatting: 3 There were many problems here which I will summarize in a list:
  • Get rid of the beginning picture, it isn't funny, and messy.
  • Just read your stuff man, there are some grammar mistakes which jump off the page.
  • Get rid of the counters, they aren't funny and are messy.
  • Spread out your pictures and put them on both sides of your page.
  • Get rid of the lists, they aren't funny and make everything messy.
Images: 5 Decent, the pictures add NO humorous value, but aren't random like the rest of your article. Either switch them out to make them funnier, or add funnier captions. Again, remove the giant picture, it isn't funny, and VERY messy looking.
Miscellaneous: 3 Averaged
Final Score: 14 Sorry for the briefness, my computer crashed and I had a full review unsaved. If you want my thoughts a bit more elobarated upon I could add to this, but you should fix up what I have said first before anything. I consider just starting over with a new topic. If you have any questions feel free to ask me on my talk page. Good luck!
Reviewer: ~SirTagstitVFHNotMPEEINGCPTRotMBFF 17:35, 24 February 2009 (UTC)

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