Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/Berverly Hills Tales

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edit User:Thekillerfroggy/UnBooks:Beverly Hills Tales

Here lies a spoof of Canterbury Tales, set on the west coast. It's far from complete, I'd just like to know how it's doing after two verses in half-assed on and off iambic pentameter. --Littleboyonly TKFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK Oldmanonly 02:01, 7 June 2007 (UTC)

Added moar verses. --Littleboyonly TKFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK Oldmanonly 23:40, 12 June 2007 (UTC)
Humour: 7 Hard to judge. I think this will work well. I imagine it's difficult to fit into metre and rhyme and yet be funny. So far the tone, and the fact its a parody, provide the most humour. There's a lot of potential with the characters - the 15-year-old is well done - and I imagine with their stories as well. Actual references to the Tales will be hard for most people to get, so you'll probably find a more general approach will be easier as you go along - you included several references in the intro, which some people will appreciate. I especially liked the bums' "liquor" (though for Chaucer this meant "liquid," but that's okay). The problem is that if you try to do too much it will be harder to fit in the best possible humour.
Concept: 10 This has a lot of potential, and is a great idea, if a mammoth undertaking.
Prose and formatting: 8 It would be good to have an audio version. Sometimes the metre is hard to read, especially when you try to fit in extra syllables. You're using a rhyming dictionary? - otherwise you definitely should. "Pilgrimages" and "engagements" is sure forced, though in general you've done well with the rhymes. You could put in more links. Grammar and spelling are good, though it would be much more impressive in Middle English.
Images: 3 Well...I guess in time you'll improve this. You don't need tons of pictures if this is going to be long; the odd good one dotted here and there with good captions is better than too many that waters down the effect.
Miscellaneous: 6 The score would go up once you've done more.
Final Score: 34 I'm looking forward to reading more. Then I'll expect you to do all of Paradise Lost.
Reviewer: Sir Roger 04:01, 28 June 2007 (UTC)
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