this is the second rewrite of this article that I have submitted. Please give any ideas for amelioration. Also, am I overusing pee review? --Darwin of suburbia 11:38, 13 August 2007 (UTC)
Some quite funny bits. Especially liked the references to androginous Japenese emo children and "shipwrecked". The UK A-levels bit was pretty good as well. Less random humour, such as "The remaining 2% of the population were disembodied organs and as such could not express interest in the world not understanding them." Overall, much better than most stuff on Uncyclopedia, but nowhere near as good as the best articles...
Not as keen on the subject as the last reviewer. I hated the film! I guess this article aint for me
Prose and formatting:
Written not so badly. Could be better, but could be (much!) worse.
The images work for me, but the table thing at the start is a bit dodgy. Takes up too much of the page (but has some quite funny bits in it). Any way it could be reduced in width?
DO NOT give up on this article. Keep going with the Pee reviews. Not an admin, or even a regular contributor, so can't say too much, but you won't get banned for "over using the pee-review system", especially not in good faith.
You're getting there! One more re-write. The average article is huffed in about 30 seconds. The average novel takes about 7 re-writes. You do the math!!