Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/Babies: The Ugly Truth

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edit Babies: The Ugly Truth

created whilst I was an IP and briefly editted when I bothered to make an account, I was informed that Pee Review is often a good idea so I figured I'd give it a go and see what this article could do with improving.. Mammon 15:29, August 31, 2010 (UTC)

Humour: 6 The first part very much funny. After we leave the introduction, not so much...
Concept: 8 I like it. It is combining the babies are evil with the exposing a terrible lie and danger to society
Prose and formatting: 4 At the introduction, the style of this article truly shines, not only being funny, but being a PERFECT match for what I would expect from the title. As soon as the intro ends, style is killed. It not only completely changes (most cases very bad in general and ruining the feel of it), but changes for a worse style than we had before. I personally completely despise the question and answer style it has in almost every case. There are a few exceptions, but this isn't one of them. However, your grammar and spelling are almost perfect in the beginning (check the capitalization in one of the sentences though it was wrong, and I'm much too lazy to fix it).
Images: 5 needs moar pix! Also, I feel like the comment under the only picture detracts from the feel of the article at the beginning, which is sad as that is where this thing really shines. One picture I can think of off the top of my head is the photoshopped one where a baby looks like a demon, kinda scary actually. It's [File:Evil_baby.jpg]
Miscellaneous: 5 The number of letters in the word penis
Final Score: 28 This article could be so good, and starts off so well. Then it crashes right as it is about to take off from the runway. If the entire article was like the introduction part, I'd totally put your article on VFH. While I can't think off of the top of my head any ideas on how to expand this article after removing the bad part, it really does need more content. I think you could save some of the content in the first couple of headers if you rewrote them, but the last too suck donkey dick aren't that great. I would maybe add some information on the history of how the lie of babies was created. I like the baby picture 'proof' counterargument (though it being invented by science doesn't seem to match well). If I can come up with any ideas to further help you I will post them on your talk page or something.
Reviewer: -- Soldat Teh PWNerator (pwnt!) 22:28, Sep 1
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