Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/Aromanians

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edit Aromanians

Hovereel 12:26, 16 May 2009 (UTC)

...

Humour: 7.44 First Paragraph - A bit too detailed, not eye-catching enough. Maybe expand it a bit to make it less like a Wikipedia article and more like an Uncyclopedian article.

Aromanians can trace their origins... - This paragraph was a bit random but it was funny. The broken latin part was the funniest. The tense was a bit shaky - it should be "as the country was flat" and not "as the country is flat". It would be correct if it was a statement/reported speech but this is direct speech. For the rocket part you should include something about Chinese - they invented rockets.

When in the 19 century the wave of nationalism... - Funny, but you should include something about why the Aromanians were valued. So as to make it more convincing.

Famous Aromanians - For Lord Byron, don't so lord. That's no midget! Don't say "not gay" either. Say "straight". It's more to-the-point.

Generally - I must say, this was a good piece of work. I laughed so many times :D

Concept: 7 Has potential, maybe you should accent on the part "Contrary to popular belief, Aromanians are not the opposite of Romanians. " and expand the concept. I felt the article was very funny. It made me laugh.
Prose and formatting: 4 Paragraphing - Not really very good. It seems that the intro consists of those three lengthy paragraphs. Maybe you can make another section as "history" an include the content from paragraph 2 onwards, about the "Aromanians can trace their origins". It would look a lot better and I do think it would be more organized.

Red Links - The plethora of red links are very very distracting. Either remove them or replace them. ([[article|display_text]] works too.)

Images: 2 No images, but on account of the funny article, I'll give a 2.
Miscellaneous: 5.1 Averaged.
Final Score: 25.54 Could be better, if not for the images and the red links. But it was seriously funny; little errors.
Reviewer: The la Zhel 14:55, 16 May 2009 (UTC)
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