This article just didn't make me laugh. Gratuitous celebrity references, blatant exaggerations, and utter randomness is all fine, but there wasn't any point. It's like the author threw them in because they knew funny things have that sort of stuff in it. What this article needs is a point. See next box.
Anti-Ugly Pills... It's got potential. Suggestions: Make the article a snarky commentary on the value of beauty in America. Write about: Are ugly people harmful? Should they be hunted for sport? Are there any other ways of taking the pill? What are the ingredients of the pill? How does it work exactly? Is life expectancy decreased? Has anyone ever died from overuse? Do users eventually turn into hunks of plastic and lose all brain function? Is this the origin of Paris Hilton? ...And so on. Like I said, there's potential, but just not now.
Prose and formatting:
This is very bland stuff: The same sardonic, hyperbolic ramblings I've seen so many times. Why not freshen it up by writing from the point of view of the inventor of the pill, or a cosmetics company, or the ugly kid, or even Paris Hilton? Anything to make it interesting.
There's not too much to improve this one, in my opinion. Only thing I can think of is finding ONE REALLY HIDEOUS doctored photo. So hideous it'll make you laugh. Oh, or someone who's overdosed on the Anti-Ugly Pills.
Just the rough average score.
Make this article not just silly, but cleverly sarcastic about the role of beauty in our culture.