Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/Andy Kaufman
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Only needs a quickie. --21:50, June 4, 2011 (UTC)
- Said I would. (talk) 00:41, 27 June 2011
|Humour:||2||ASDFLJasdjlkoidjkARJLKAASDsjdfn Sorry, Lyrithya told me her cat could get this one. I knew it wasn't a good idea.
You're a very mean person. Did you know that? You do now. You're a mean, nasty person. You're probably adopted too, because your parents don't even love you. If you didn't catch what I said, this article is pretty much impossible to review as it's very much like the Milton Babbit article that you got featured thrice. I'm giving you two scores on this section, and maybe the others as well. For the review score in the little box you get a 2. Why a 2? Is it because I hate you? Well..yes it is. But there is another reason. Beyond the "hey look, it's an andy kaufman article written in his style" factor, there really isn't too much actual comedy here. That being said, your second score is a 9 for the way that you did the entire article like he'd do one of his...routines. The one point off is for the ending where it seems like you either ran out of ideas or just got tired of writing. Right now it's a bit of an abrupt ending and seems more like an outline of what you were going to write next.
To get the "actual" humor score up I'd recommend adding in links that take some of the more strange words and link them to things that sound the same. For example, I think one of the words was "victuals" which, of course means vitals, or food, but you could link it to something like "victory" or w/e. Other than that I can't really think of anything else, but good job with the "article written in the style of that person" thing.
|Concept:||10||Concept, great. Execution, excellent. Don't really know what to say here, you obviously knew what you were doing. I guess I should again point out that the ending is abrupt, but I already said that. Moving on...|
|Prose and formatting:||8||I should give you two scores, but whatever. There are a couple spots where the novel itself could be broken into a couple more lines. For example, the paragraph about Jim telling people about his witch story could probably be broken in two at the "Jim always kept that five-center piece round his neck ..." line just to make it not look like a giant brick of text. Again, ending is a bit abrupt, you could flesh it out a bit just to make it not seem like it ends in the middle of his monologue. Maybe actually have part of the third chapter then have it trail off at a boring part until the Two hours later...
The main thing, though, is the fact that the article is utterly devoid of links which is highlighted by the fact that the majority of your pictures aren't colored. This makes your article look a bit dead. Even having those little blue words helps a lot toward making your article look better, although I'd try to get at least one more color picture as well.
|Images:||8||Most of these are really quick fixes. Like I said above getting another color picture would really help with the look of this article, but that is optional as adding links would do the same thing without potentially disrupting anything. The pictures, for the most part, are great, but there are a couple things I think you should fix.
The first picture is rather small for how long the caption is, and since an intro section leads itself to white space I think you should make the picture at least a little bit bigger as it would make the caption not extend as far down as well as make the text itself not quite as long. This is pretty much the same case as the picture of the gang of boys in chapter two. The caption for that pic is extending really far down, and there is a bit of white space that could be cleared out by making the picture bigger. You have spots that aren't necessarily begging for pictures, but you could fit one in if you felt you found a good one.
The captions for all of these pictures are great, even if the ending of the first one is a bit confusing. I wouldn't change them unless you yourself find it necessary.
|Miscellaneous:||10||To balance out that 2 above|
|Final Score:||38||Did I mention you're a terrible person?|