Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/Aiden

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edit Aiden

A page that is necessarily existent; I just hope it's good too. User:MrMetalFLower/sig

is being reviewed by
Your Source for Fine Scented Pee
And Whatever Else Comes Out Of Him

I've never heard of this band, but I hope that won't matter... I'm on a roll reviewing stuff today. --  Le Cejak <-> 16:03, 11 November 2007 (UTC)

Humour: 5.3 avg of all the sections.
  • Intro [6]

Actually, the intro was pretty funny however (A) it's short, (B) you should've introduced the narrator to us (the 15 year old girl) and (C) you need to introduce the band to us!! (B) Remember, the main character of this article should be the 15 year old girl explaining Aiden to us. Introduce us to her. (C) It's no guarantee that we'll know what you're talking about. Please introduce the band, it's members, it's albums, and that one magazine to us.

  • 1 24th July, 2006 [8]

Again, funny and the narrator becomes active here.

  • 2 30th August 2007 [8]

Above average reading affair in this section.

  • 3 31st August 2007 [6]

You lost me. You're bringing in too many different things that the avg reader (me?) wouldn't know about. What is Kerrang? Who is wiL?

  • 4 1st October 2007 [6]

Too short. You should probably merge this section with others.

  • 5 2nd October 2007 [5]

Yeah, you should merge these sections. Is this supposed to be a diary? I just now realized that. I'm dumb.

  • 6 3rd October 2007 [5]

Ooh, you just copied 24th July, 2006. Poor form.

  • 7 4th October 2007 [3]

Well, uh... SEE YA LATER! HAVE FUN IN NYC LOLZ! ...Is that what you want me to say? Cuz it's too damn short and it makes no sense.

Concept: 8 Band idea (6=nearly adequate) + narrator with character writing on her Myspace (+2). Please give us more info on (1) the narrator and (2) the band. Don't stick so much to Emo stereotypes.
Prose and formatting: 7 Adequate. Is it supposed to be a journal?
Images: 7 Adequate pictures.
Miscellaneous: 6.8 avg of all your other scores.
Final Score: 34.1 Follow my advice:
  • Merge those sections or (better idea) make them longer.
  • Explain the band more for those of us who haven't listened to them.
  • Go more in depth into the 15 year old girl's character.
Reviewer:   Le Cejak <-> 16:24, 11 November 2007 (UTC)
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