Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/A Note from your Killer
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Eh, I wrote this last night. I finished it up this afternoon. Try not to be to hard on it, I haven't written an article for a while.
Attempt to Enjoy.
Kglee 19:58, 14 October 2008 (UTC)
For a bumming session with Noel Fielding
- Well..., anytime now... (Sorry for Impatience) --Kglee 22:04, 15 October 2008 (UTC)
- What do you mean, "try not to be too hard on it"? It's an article, not a fanfic. If it's not up to par then it shouldn't be on here. Anyway, I think that the italics are a little too much. It makes me not want to read it. I'm sure I'm not speaking for just myself. Cut down on that. Other than that, it's creative, and fine, I guess. I'm sure it would even be hilarious to a few people. ~ // Lunaquois 22:11, 15 October 2008 (UTC)
|Humour:||6.95||Strong stuff here, VFH material. The prose could be sharper and more sinister; it seems over jokey at the moment which makes it less funny than it could be.
|Concept:||7||Great idea, and a decent execution, not complaints here, I think a bit of honing and sharpening would not be a bad Idea, I would alter the conclusion an some f the formatting. I have no major issues with this, I feel it works well - I personally would vote for it on VFH (after a few adjustments) - I think others would as well, it’s a good idea done well.|
|Prose and formatting:||6||I discussed some merging and some in joke reduction previously, I’ll do so again now - other things were the merging of the first section and the third and fourth sections. This is a major gripe I have is the conclusion, I dislike the large image at the end and a weak conclusion - you build up the right kind of tension, keep taking the Viagra throughout will improve the article and not cause a sudden deflation at the end. There were a few spelling errors, I fixed the ones I could see, but maybe have it checked over be amore reliable source. I don't usually like the username template, good use here though, and through a good prose and formatting is present.|
|Images:||6||Good, The aforementioned last one, they all fit well and the captions work well also and act well into a cohesive whole - good stuff here, I would change this.|
|Miscellaneous:||6.5||Good stuff, I would change the end and make a few adjustments - otherwise this is a very good article - major complaints.|
|Final Score:||32.45||I hope I was helpful - I do often take a little longer to review as I'm often attending other matters on the site or in the meatspace, I hope there was no major inconvenience. Should you have any questions/queries do not hesitate to leave a note on my talkpage:)|
|Reviewer:||--20:43, 16 October 2008 (UTC)|