Uncyclopedia:Pee Review/A Message From An Uncyclopedia Hater

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Revision as of 15:48, May 23, 2009 by Saberwolf116 (talk | contribs)

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edit A Message From An Uncyclopedia Hater

Made for boredom. The bad typing is a result of me typing faster than I can (WHICH I DID ON PURPOSE) DoNotWant - [talk] 14:54, 23 May 2009 (UTC)

Humour: 4 Uhh...huh. Well, I can tell you're trying to sound like a pissed off user, but I had two huge problems with that: first, it was nearly impossible to understand. I know you're trying to sound stupid, but when an article takes effort to read, it usually isn't funny. Second, it's too short, and you get a bit listy in the middle. It's going to be tricky expanding this, because you only really have one joke here, so you might want to ask around on tips for this. Right now, it's not very funny because it's incoherent.
Concept: 4.5 Well, there are a of couple things wrong with your concept: first, while you may or may not be aware of this, there is already a rant similair to this: Uncyclopedia is the Worst (if you're gonna expand on this, look to that for examples). The good thing about that article is that it's a rant, but it's an understandable rant, and it's kind of funny at the same time. Second, like I said above, your article is kind of a one trick pony.
Prose and formatting: 3 I know it's intentionally bad, but I can't give this a high score. There's a difference between making an idiotic rant and just making something incomprehensible. If you want a good idea of how to make your prose less than perfect, i'd recommend taking a look at HowTo:Build the Perfect Sandcastle. Notice how the narrator sounds stupid, but you can also understand him? That's the kind of thing you should strive for with this article. Also, in your second section you have a list. Lists are usually dull and boring, so i'd recommend taking that section and making it into a paragraph.
Images: 4 Sexy, but still unrelated to the rest of the article. I think the best image you could probably put here would be the picture of a baby crying (to represent whining) or maybe a trash bag with the same caption you have for your current image- Britney Spears flipping the bird doesn't really relate to Uncyclopedia.
Miscellaneous: 4 My overall grade of the article.
Final Score: 19.5 There's nothing wrong with making a good rant about Uncyclopedia, but you have to make your rant sound like someone would actually say that- i'm fairly confident no human being can spell that bad if they speak fluent English. As stated above, rewrite your article so that your want sounds intelligible and stupid at the same time- I.E. spell words right, but forget puncuation. Something along the lines of "Hello my name is <insert name here> sorry for mi bad speling im only sevn yrs old". Also, add a few more relevant images, and expand your article.

Bottom Line: Make your rant coherent, and expand it a bit. Good luck! =)

Reviewer: Saberwolf116 15:48, 23 May 2009 (UTC)
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