My newest article. Some news this time.
Seunketchup88 07:53, 25 February 2008 (UTC)
Alright, this isn't completely terrible. But it's not pretty. By Cajek's scale, this article falls into the 5 range. The humor is probably the weakest part of this article. It's not very well written, something I normally addresss in the Prose section, but as it pertains to humor as well I'm going to make even more of a fuss about it here. Writing like that just isn't that funny, it's only going to make you look very noobish. (believe it or not) Try to draw from your original concept, which seems to be the Mitsubishi thing. More car jokes are more than adequate for an UnNews article of this length.
I'm really having some trouble scoring you in this category. While I think this is a great idea for an article, I just can't give you points for your execution. If it were purely on the idea, then this would be a 7. If it were on your execution, it would be another 5. I averaged the two to equal this score. This is a definite rewrite, simply because I see a great idea here that was poorly written. I'm not asking you to make up anything new, you've got a great concept staring you in the face. Just follow it up with more jokes about the car.
Prose and formatting:
Ghastly. I really have a hard time giving you any points at all for an article this ugly. Your prose is, well, who are we kidding? There is none. It's just more of this gangsta jarble mixed with noobspeak that I've seen in the other articles of yours that I've reviewed. You know my thoughts on the way you've been writing articles, so I don't think it would be doing either of us any good if I continued to try to drill it into you. But until you learn how to be funny and not just stupid, don't expect this score to be any higher. That goes for any respectable reviewer on this site who may come across one of your articles, not just me.
The one image you have is okay. Looks like you did it yourself (from the upload history) and that you did a pretty bad job of it. It's okay to not be good at image editing, because thankfully we have potatochoppers on call if you ever need anything. And they do it for free! Try requesting an image next time rather than trying to battle it out yourself.
It seems like you've been getting a little better as far as having a good concept to follow. You set it up at the beginning (sort of) and then take off running in the opposite direction. Also, your writing could use a great deal of improvement. Keep practicing, this article writing business takes a long time to get good at. Hell, I've been here on and off for well over a year now and I still don't have a single feature. It's hard to write a good article. I'm glad you're using Pee Review to allow us to help you get better at it!