The Uncyclopedia Legal Department has, by the immense deductive power in its immediate disposal, noticed that the article has a lewd, reasonably underhanded or questionable reference to a certain John D. Lifeless. We have notified the remaining family members of Mr. Lifeless of this, and it is now in their discretion whether to pursue legal action or not.
The author(s) of the article should note that the department is in position to suggest optional courses of action to the estate.
Therefore: The authors of the article are strongly advised to leave a sizable amount of freshly minted cash, in a brown paper bag, in the large trash can in the corridor of Uncyclopedia Legal Department as soon as possible. This article, and the trash can, will be monitored closely until further notice.
This notification was delivered according to statute 17, paragraph 38: On devices of collecting funds in dire straits.